Enjoying sad things?

[FrostedShores]

Why do people enjoy sad things? What's going on in the brain when a person listens to sad music or watches a sad movie? And from a mental health perspective, which is preferable: to spend most of your time enjoying sad, negative things, or to be entirely anhedonic and not able to really enjoy anything?

I've gone through a long bout of anhedonia that is finally waning. I'm enjoying things again, but all the things I'm enjoying are sad or negative in some way: sad music, sad tv/movies, sad books, etc. I can't seem to get any enjoyment out of positive things...

Is this just a personality quirk? Or could it be related to other things, such as low dopamine or high estrogen or something along those lines?

 

[Makrosky]

Why do people enjoy sad things? What's going on in the brain when a person listens to sad music or watches a sad movie? And from a mental health perspective, which is preferable: to spend most of your time enjoying sad, negative things, or to be entirely anhedonic and not able to really enjoy anything?

I've gone through a long bout of anhedonia that is finally waning. I'm enjoying things again, but all the things I'm enjoying are sad or negative in some way: sad music, sad tv/movies, sad books, etc. I can't seem to get any enjoyment out of positive things...

Is this just a personality quirk? Or could it be related to other things, such as low dopamine or high estrogen or something along those lines?

"Sad things" as you call them have their own kind of beautiness that you cannot appreciate if "happy". And viceversa.

Soul looks for completeness.

If you are all the time sad, then that is another story. It is called depression and to fix it... well, the forum has 348923 threads about it with great advice. Keep reading :)

 

[FrostedShores]

"Sad things" as you call them have their own kind of beautiness that you cannot appreciate if "happy". And viceversa.

Soul looks for completeness.

If you are all the time sad, then that is another story. It is called depression and to fix it... well, the forum has 348923 threads about it with great advice. Keep reading :)

Thanks for your reply. To be clear, I'm not depressed. I'm truly enjoying myself. Just curious why I'm attracted to more negative things, as opposed to positive things. I'm aware of the research on negative thinking and how detrimental that can be, so I was wondering if that extended to enjoying sad things in general.

 

[redsun]

Why do people enjoy sad things? What's going on in the brain when a person listens to sad music or watches a sad movie? And from a mental health perspective, which is preferable: to spend most of your time enjoying sad, negative things, or to be entirely anhedonic and not able to really enjoy anything?

I've gone through a long bout of anhedonia that is finally waning. I'm enjoying things again, but all the things I'm enjoying are sad or negative in some way: sad music, sad tv/movies, sad books, etc. I can't seem to get any enjoyment out of positive things...

Is this just a personality quirk? Or could it be related to other things, such as low dopamine or high estrogen or something along those lines?

Its normal to feel sad sometimes and when we do, its normal for humans to want to experience something (music, movie, etc) that they resonate with at that time and for that short moment it may be "enjoyable". But if you voluntarily only consume depressing/sad media and cannot enjoy positive things like that means you enjoy your misery. You enjoy feeling misery, sadness, despair, hopelessness which means you are depressed and you warped your mind into thinking negative things are good and something to enjoy. Even if you dont think you are depressed, you are likely hiding that from yourself. Its not a personality trait.

Often these people are not even capable of reacting in anger to a situation or event that may warrant it. They only react in weak negative emotions like sadness and depressive behavior. This can be a sign of a very weak physical body due to ill health or bad thinking habits and thought processes that basically have distorted an individual's worldview.

 

[FrostedShores]

Its normal to feel sad sometimes and when we do, its normal for humans to want to experience something (music, movie, etc) that they resonate with at that time and for that short moment it may be "enjoyable". But if you voluntarily only consume depressing/sad media and cannot enjoy positive things like that means you enjoy your misery. You enjoy feeling misery, sadness, despair, hopelessness which means you are depressed and you warped your mind into thinking negative things are good and something to enjoy. Even if you dont think you are depressed, you are likely hiding that from yourself. Its not a personality trait.

Often these people are not even capable of reacting in anger to a situation or event that may warrant it. They only react in weak negative emotions like sadness and depressive behavior. This can be a sign of a very weak physical body due to ill health or bad thinking habits and thought processes that basically have distorted an individual's worldview.

Interesting. I experienced severe depression throughout my teens and into my twenties; perhaps that experience warped my view of things. What I'm experiencing now doesn't feel like the severe depression I experienced before, but maybe you're right; maybe it's just a mild form of depression that I didn't interpret as such.

 

[redsun]

Interesting. I experienced severe depression throughout my teens and into my twenties; perhaps that experience warped my view of things. What I'm experiencing now doesn't feel like the severe depression I experienced before, but maybe you're right; maybe it's just a mild form of depression that I didn't interpret as such.

Your right it is probably more mild now compared to before. But what I did in this situation was stop all forms of media that may perpetuate this cycle of negative emotions. No music, no movies, whatever it is that is sad, depressing, demotivating, reinforces a sense of hopelessness and futility. Cold turkey never expose yourself to these things again for a very long time and only entertain yourself with uplifting, happy, exciting, exhilarating, motivating media.

Also find some form of hobby or activity that you genuinely enjoy. Its impossible to change when you constantly expose yourself to sadness in some way or another.

 

[FrostedShores]

Your right it is probably more mild now compared to before. But what I did in this situation was stop all forms of media that may perpetuate this cycle of negative emotions. No music, no movies, whatever it is that is sad, depressing, demotivating, reinforces a sense of hopelessness and futility. Cold turkey never expose yourself to these things again for a very long time and only entertain yourself with uplifting, happy, exciting, exhilarating, motivating media.

Also find some form of hobby or activity that you genuinely enjoy. Its impossible to change when you constantly expose yourself to sadness in some way or another.

Thanks for the advice. I've actually been looking into doing an extended "dopamine detox" - no screens, no electronics, no media.

 

[redsun]

Thanks for the advice. I've actually been looking into doing an extended "dopamine detox" - no screens, no electronics, no media.

Unless you plan on never using electronics again I dont see the point. But thats just my opinion. I also dont see how that would help your enjoyment of negative media. Yes you remove all negative media but also that would mean positive forms of media as well.

 

[FrostedShores]

Unless you plan on never using electronics again I dont see the point. But thats just my opinion. I also dont see how that would help your enjoyment of negative media. Yes you remove all negative media but also that would mean positive forms of media as well.

My thought process was to remove media altogether, then slowly introduce positive media. The only negative, sad things I'm exposed to are from media and technology - my life outside of media and tech is pretty good. I've also heard "dopamine detoxes" can help to essentially reset your pleasure centers; not sure if this is valid, but I see no reason to not give it a shot.

 

[redsun]

My thought process was to remove media altogether, then slowly introduce positive media. The only negative, sad things I'm exposed to are from media and technology - my life outside of media and tech is pretty good. I've also heard "dopamine detoxes" can help to essentially reset your pleasure centers; not sure if this is valid, but I see no reason to not give it a shot.

If you want to do that I say go for it.

It is valid. But your body's dopamine activity always responds to novelty and also becomes used to whatever releases dopamine from chronic exposure. If I stop media for like a week or two, my body we'll be more sensitized to release dopamine in response to it once I start again but eventually it will become used to it again. Same goes for caffeine withdrawal and getting back on caffeine and other stimulants.

So no matter what you do habitually, the body is always going to adapt to whatever it is. So you may be sensitized after abstaining but that goes away with time again. The trick to dopamine and to improving the overall mental state is to always do something new, look for novel experiences, try new things, work towards long term goals, complete simple goals that are novel to you. The brain rewards you for seeking novelty.

I am not saying don't try media detox. But you should also keep what I said about novelty in mind. That's an important part of it. Some people do take dopamine detox too far where they detox from all forms of stimulation for so long that they start to find grass fascinating. Which is amusing and strange at the same time.

 

[Makrosky]

Some people do take dopamine detox too far where they detox from all forms of stimulation for so long that they start to find grass fascinating

I think this only happens in extreme detoxes like meditation retreats, vipassana, etc.

Normal detoxes like quitting coffee, porn and instagram I don't think can achieve that.

 

[FrostedShores]

If you want to do that I say go for it.

It is valid. But your body's dopamine activity always responds to novelty and also becomes used to whatever releases dopamine from chronic exposure. If I stop media for like a week or two, my body we'll be more sensitized to release dopamine in response to it once I start again but eventually it will become used to it again. Same goes for caffeine withdrawal and getting back on caffeine and other stimulants.

So no matter what you do habitually, the body is always going to adapt to whatever it is. So you may be sensitized after abstaining but that goes away with time again. The trick to dopamine and to improving the overall mental state is to always do something new, look for novel experiences, try new things, work towards long term goals, complete simple goals that are novel to you. The brain rewards you for seeking novelty.

I am not saying don't try media detox. But you should also keep what I said about novelty in mind. That's an important part of it. Some people do take dopamine detox too far where they detox from all forms of stimulation for so long that they start to find grass fascinating. Which is amusing and strange at the same time.

There's something almost wholesome about finding grass fascinating :P

Thank you for your response. I'll keep what you said in mind and work on incorporating more positive media.

 

[Peachy]

This is me all the way. Recently I was enjoying a happy-sounding song and thought maybe I do like happy music. But when I listened closely to the words, it was about nuclear apocalypse

 

[Cow]

If you have gone through a long bout of anhedonia and are now feeling ANYTHING, that is awesome! I had benzo induced anhedonia for 15 years and it took me two more after quitting all medication to start feeling and enjoying life again.

I resonate with sad things, too. I enjoy crying. I listen to Memories of Green (the piano riff from Bladerunner) just about every day and it makes me cry every damn time. It just cuts right to the exquisite sadness of being alive (um, or, in Rachel's case, being a replicant). I enjoy the emotion of it, and find it cleansing. But in balance, I also feel intense joy at stuff like watching a squirrel or seeing a wild poppy.

Maybe remove the labels like "sad" and "positive" and just enjoy the fact that you are feeling alive again and you happen to appreciate that "sad" music or books are often beautiful and poignant. As long as you are also experiencing gratitude and finding amusement and being inspired, and having other emotions, I don't see a problem. People naturally settle into difference places on the emotional scale, at different times in their lives. But if you are feeling "addicted" to the melancholic side of things, you can always make an effort to explore why that may be. ~Best of luck to you!

 

[ThinPicking]

I listen to Memories of Green (the piano riff from Bladerunner) just about every day and it makes me cry every damn time.

What a curious pastime miss. Blade Runner and 2049 certainly have incredible soundtracks.

Sometimes I rewatch the scene from 2049, where Joe checks his memory with Dr Stelline. She cries and says "Someone lived this, yes. This happened.".

I know there's metaphor in it for me but I'm still turning that over. 5 years later.