Drank a bit of alcohol when I was stressed, did my errands and felt great!

[VitoScaletta]

Very stressful and scary time for me today... I have a fear of being thrown out of my educational institutie. I was feeling very suicidal, lots of ***t in my life... Took a few swigs of alcohol and I haven't felt this type of good in a long time... I addressed, although very irresponsibly, my issue at hand which was texting some very authoritarian and dreadful staff member from the institute. It was irresponsible because I depended on my mom and asked her for help in what to write.
Then I felt like going out, and decided to go to the store. When I was picking the fruit at the store I was actually thinking about the fruit and not what's going on behind or around me, when I usually stumble at what I'm doing when there's people around, and listen to what they're saying.
I was more courteous and willing to help other people. I was more receptive but on the things that matter. My words got our easier. This sounds like victimhood but I really felt like a normal person.

I felt a tiny bit less able when it came to defending myself or seducing women. But otherwise, I felt like I had a weight lifted off my chest and I was free to roam the world.


I don't know if this experience could mean that my mental situation is fixable naturally. That state I was in was simply incredible in-terms of anxiety. It's a significant problem in my life and takes away a 1/3 of my energy when I'm outside... Going out like this was incredible. How do I approach this situation?

 

[joaquin]

Very stressful and scary time for me today... I have a fear of being thrown out of my educational institutie. I was feeling very suicidal, lots of ***t in my life... Took a few swigs of alcohol and I haven't felt this type of good in a long time... I addressed, although very irresponsibly, my issue at hand which was texting some very authoritarian and dreadful staff member from the institute. It was irresponsible because I depended on my mom and asked her for help in what to write.
Then I felt like going out, and decided to go to the store. When I was picking the fruit at the store I was actually thinking about the fruit and not what's going on behind or around me, when I usually stumble at what I'm doing when there's people around, and listen to what they're saying.
I was more courteous and willing to help other people. I was more receptive but on the things that matter. My words got our easier. This sounds like victimhood but I really felt like a normal person.

I felt a tiny bit less able when it came to defending myself or seducing women. But otherwise, I felt like I had a weight lifted off my chest and I was free to roam the world.


I don't know if this experience could mean that my mental situation is fixable naturally. That state I was in was simply incredible in-terms of anxiety. It's a significant problem in my life and takes away a 1/3 of my energy when I'm outside... Going out like this was incredible. How do I approach this situation?

The lure of booze. First it feels good, and then... "At the last it biteth like a serpent, and stingeth like an adder" Proverbs 23:32

 

[Hans]

This sounds like victimhood but I really felt like a normal person.

Doesn't sound like victimhood at all. You're not blaming your circumstances.

I felt a tiny bit less able when it came to defending myself or seducing women.

That's most likely because you felt more relaxed and less driven to do those things. Not a bad thing.

I don't know if this experience could mean that my mental situation is fixable naturally. That state I was in was simply incredible in-terms of anxiety. It's a significant problem in my life and takes away a 1/3 of my energy when I'm outside... Going out like this was incredible. How do I approach this situation?

Alcohol is strong GABA-ergic, which is giving you this benefit. A decade ago I had the same issue. Could socialize or have a good time without alcohol. I was shy, wired, self-conscious, afraid, etc. Alcohol made me feel normal and able to have a good time.

Likely in your case, glutamate is dominating GABA, which is making you feel on edge all the time. It's possible that your sympathetic nervous system is dominating your parasympathetic nervous system.

Zinc, magnesium, theanine, bacopa, taurine, etc., are all inhibitory compounds with GABA-ergic effects.

I fixed myself by eating a nutrient-dense diet, doing exercise, getting lots of sunlight, and facing my fears. Diet played the biggest role here ofc.

 

[Brundle]

Funny that you mention about being able to focus on the fruit at the store rather than the voices around you. I have the same experience with GABA raising substances like alcohol or Phenibut.

It seems to provide the energy needed to focus, the energy to ignore distracting noises and even intrusive thoughts. The thoughts arise, but are easily ignored. Whereas in an anxious state, you are forced to give them attention even though you don't want to.

Like Peat said, it takes energy to relax.

 

[Runenight201]

Very stressful and scary time for me today... I have a fear of being thrown out of my educational institutie. I was feeling very suicidal, lots of ***t in my life... Took a few swigs of alcohol and I haven't felt this type of good in a long time... I addressed, although very irresponsibly, my issue at hand which was texting some very authoritarian and dreadful staff member from the institute. It was irresponsible because I depended on my mom and asked her for help in what to write.
Then I felt like going out, and decided to go to the store. When I was picking the fruit at the store I was actually thinking about the fruit and not what's going on behind or around me, when I usually stumble at what I'm doing when there's people around, and listen to what they're saying.
I was more courteous and willing to help other people. I was more receptive but on the things that matter. My words got our easier. This sounds like victimhood but I really felt like a normal person.

I felt a tiny bit less able when it came to defending myself or seducing women. But otherwise, I felt like I had a weight lifted off my chest and I was free to roam the world.


I don't know if this experience could mean that my mental situation is fixable naturally. That state I was in was simply incredible in-terms of anxiety. It's a significant problem in my life and takes away a 1/3 of my energy when I'm outside... Going out like this was incredible. How do I approach this situation?

Red Flags all over the place and if you don't seriously address this you're in for hell imo. Because an experience like this is going to want to lead you to consume alcohol again anytime you're feeling overwhelmed, just know that eventually this will stop working and instead actually make things worse. Take Hans advice and fix yourself. If you can get out of this environment while working on yourself I'd do that as well. Minimize all external stressors while building yourself back up. When you are strong you can battle with the snakes in the garden.