Newbie here...and lots of help needed!

charlie

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WTB, great post, thank you.
 
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Dutchie

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PeatFeat said:
Dutchie,
It seems to me like you may be suffering from some form of "adult selective eating" (google it). I feel like most of us on this forum have suffered from some degree of this in our quest towards health. My concern is that your obsession with food and health is actually making you unhealthy. Restricting yourself of entire food groups can lead to deficiencies over time. Also, if you feel guilty when you do eat something "unhealthy" it can have a worse effect on your health than the food actually does. After reading your posts, I fear your problems are more psychological than physical. One thing I've learned is the internet can be a dangerous place and it's important not to go overboard on some of the information floating around. The most important skill we can have is learning to listen to the feedback from our body instead of aimlessly following all of the dogmatic ideologies about food and health being spread around. Food is a very important part of health but there are many more factors as well.

I was never selective regarding foods,but ate what I liked...kinda....but turned out I was (am?) always drawn to the wrong foods,stuff that probably feed wrong gut bacteria. From a fairly young age I became chubby/lightly obese and not really that energetic,warm or whatsoever...I also never,really starting in my teens, had a really feminine figure (small boobs,most fat on my belly(and probably even looking bigger bc of bloating) and lower back, flat kinda saggy ****,bigger upper legs,very round/double chinned puffy face, male-like hairgrowth 'sideburns'/beard/chest/breasthair,hairy legs :oops:) .....so I never felt attractive at all and very insecure.
That was when I decided I needed to start exercising/Cardioing in the gym which got totally out of hand eventually and then after a long winding road ended up discovering about the Lyme(which according to my therapist should be gone already...but still suffering from funghi/yeast/Candida....) and 75 food intolerances,the worst all the foods I love(d) to eat on a daily basis; wheat/grains,dairy,nightshades and some other foods/veggies. When I dropped all these foods I immediately lost weight...and actually became/am underweight and am just scared,in my anxious moods, that I'm gonna get fat again like I was in a not-so female manner,still have 'foodissues' not normal eating pattern etc.


So....that is how one get's 'issues'; scared by the pas regarding bodycomp/energy/trusting oneself with foods as in history (current state?) of being drawn towards the wrong stuff,all the contradictory health dietary advices regarding macro's&foodgroups..exercising types,sitting too much/watching tv etc. vs obesity/diabetes,weight/fatgain in general,IFing etc.
Also I get very anxious/fearful/restless when I feel energetic and/or warm and really feel 'I have to do something/move/workout'....as if some kind of semi-unsubconscious system kicks in 'with some alarming feeling that something bad is gonna happen'.

@WilltoBelieve It's a very long deepthought post....but I'm not sure I understand what you're trying to say.:s
 

WilltoBelieve

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Dutchie said:
"@WilltoBelieve It's a very long deepthought post....but I'm not sure I understand what you're trying to say.:s"

I'm passing out I'm so tired , so this'll be a jumbled post... but it's my time to write, since Charlie gave me a thumbs up!

Well... I was trying to give you some heartfelt encouragement... also, to encourage you to use every bit of your heart and soul and mind to work towards freedom, strength, and stability...
to break out of whatever bondage or dogma or rule is weighing on you and possibly preventing you from doing what is right (using all your powers to try to do what is best for you according to every bit of info from your senses, your heart, and your mind)
I want to share a spirit of hope to overcome the impossible, and a spirit of truth --- which also is at the core of the Ray Peat diet.

I am male... but I have had the same issues that you talk about in your last post.
(well you know- it's been said " a man without a beard is like a woman with a beard")

I had to confront myself, at one point I had to accept that I was becoming fat...
(actually, after I started my own farm I just started becoming so fat and sick... I took extreme measures and almost killed myself trying not to die... at one point I fasted for 30 days with just water.... well, free fatty acids aside, I won't judge it as wrong, but I sure wouldn't advise it to anyone ever.)
My options were running out... so much exercise and starvation, my face was getting strange red blotches on it, and my bones were just terrible. I felt at that point that if I put weight on my left leg it would just break my hip bone right off and come apart.

Wow... it was a scary time for me.
I experienced also two major pychological feelings:
When I was getting fat, and I was eating lots of animal foods (too much is no good--- and if you have a bad thyroid than you have to eat almost none) I would get a strange feeling like what you mentioned - something bad is going to happen ... I also had this feeling.... like a lion was following me and going to eat me for dinner, like death was following me...

When I would starve or eat as a vegan/mcdougal (try mcdougal if you want to burst you hindside with excess fiber) /esselstyn/fuhrman style I would recover (but with each try I would recover less, and finally not at all--- ): I would start to feel like my spirit was drifting away from my body... like If I fell asleep I might not wake up.

(Two problems that cannot be argued against : too much, and too little- of any needed thing, too much is no good, and too little is no good.... very tough for any diet guru to get out of THAT problem: like Voderplanitz ha ha)

My father also in his time, he could not figure out what was happening to him.... he was young, 36. But he couldn't figure out of his deterioration.... doctors told him it was in his head.
Within weeks he was dead. (sorry about the rhyme). Autopsy showing it was not in his head at all, it was in his veins, in his gut, in his heart... bad thyroid, pufas, etc.

I got the idea alread back then (I was 12)... "we're not in kansas anymore", the doctors are no help, the priests are no help, the schools are no help, the president is no help, the whole culture is no help.... we're on our own. (well not totally... I've gone to doctors here and there for blood tests, etc... but their advice was never very thoughtful)


It's so easy to take our lives for granted, and I have many friends who have died.... mostly of ignorance, and from having their own sense of self preservation taken away from them by the Institutions and authorities (the doctors, etc) that are continuously singing us lullabies and taking away all the possibilities.

My one friend was so brilliant, yet he believed the doctors who told him everything will be ok, and he didn't sense any danger, or the fact that while our culture and the media gives us a sense of security it is actually quite deceptive (we can stop at paranoia, yet avoid being naive). I was watching his pictures on facebook, at the same time as I was dealing with my own worst life experiences... Dead at 35... The pictures showed it coming right before everyone's eyes. But the doctors said "don't worry you're fine...." so he didn't "worry".

I'm not trying to create fear or panic... but the reason I'm alive and he isn't is because I took things into my own hands (believe me I did a lot of praying too) having already witnessed my father get the boot by the doctors, I had a heads up. (Everyone told me too "just don't worry... have another mcdonalds cheesburger". )

Many things that Ray Peat has pointed out take a good deal of time to understand...
I had to think about some articles for months before I could really understand and make sense out of it.

So if you feel the heat coming around the corner (danger...) you'll have to try things before just based on trust.

This is what I'm trying to say: value your life so much that you will do whatever it takes to preserve it and improve it. People who have easy lives and no problems won't understand you... but never mind them.

If you have a lead and a hope then try it!
Here's my lead:
If you can, get a soda siphon, a co2 cartridge, and some balloons get a quick help before you sort out all the other issues.
Get good fruit.
Get some Vitamin D (not cod liver oil) and use it.
Get some Jarlsberg cheese from a health food store.
Get some buckwheat groats if you need a grain... otherwise get sweet potatoes or regular potatoes... like you'll read about here.
Go outside as much as possible and do easy outside work, or walk around (easy- no stress, no lactate buildup)

AS for me I need a grain that's where I differ here.... I can't eat wheat barley and rye... rice has no vitamins... oats are a little heavy for me to eat regularly... so I eat buckwheat pancakes (buckwheat, water, salt)...

If you eat cheese for a few days and not meat, your body can clear out excess ammonia and get relief from serotonin overload, etc.

Or if that's not for you, than try another lead.

What I want to say is : what you think is right... by all your effort, striving, thinking and feeling... do it. And if you think you should do nothing, then do nothing. But then really just do nothing so well and strongly that you get quickly tired of it and move on to the action.

The hard part: if you think you've "tried everything" then just try something else, gotta keep trying things, (that's what I meant about will power to try again after many failures: now that's where you're probably at---- thinking you've tried everything, so you will now have to try everything else.... and if you still haven't succeeded, then you'll have to try the rest after that, etc.)

Okay... enough sermonizing...

Just make sure you stay alive and don't go have a stroke or something...

Also: There's room for bald men in this world...
So there's room for a few hairy women too, no problem.

Okay whatever is written is written here goes the submit button. No offense, I only mean well.
 
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Dutchie

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WilltoBelieve said:
Dutchie said:

I had to confront myself, at one point I had to accept that I was becoming fat...
(actually, after I started my own farm I just started becoming so fat and sick... I took extreme measures and almost killed myself trying not to die... at one point I fasted for 30 days with just water.... well, free fatty acids aside, I won't judge it as wrong, but I sure wouldn't advise it to anyone ever.)
My options were running out... so much exercise and starvation, my face was getting strange red blotches on it, and my bones were just terrible. I felt at that point that if I put weight on my left leg it would just break my hip bone right off and come apart.

Wow... it was a scary time for me.
I experienced also two major pychological feelings:
When I was getting fat, and I was eating lots of animal foods (too much is no good--- and if you have a bad thyroid than you have to eat almost none) I would get a strange feeling like what you mentioned - something bad is going to happen ... I also had this feeling.... like a lion was following me and going to eat me for dinner, like death was following me...

My one friend was so brilliant, yet he believed the doctors who told him everything will be ok, and he didn't sense any danger, or the fact that while our culture and the media gives us a sense of security it is actually quite deceptive (we can stop at paranoia, yet avoid being naive). I was watching his pictures on facebook, at the same time as I was dealing with my own worst life experiences... Dead at 35... The pictures showed it coming right before everyone's eyes. But the doctors said "don't worry you're fine...." so he didn't "worry".

Many things that Ray Peat has pointed out take a good deal of time to understand...
I had to think about some articles for months before I could really understand and make sense out of it.

This is what I'm trying to say: value your life so much that you will do whatever it takes to preserve it and improve it. People who have easy lives and no problems won't understand you... but never mind them.

If you have a lead and a hope then try it!
Here's my lead:
If you can, get a soda siphon, a co2 cartridge, and some balloons get a quick help before you sort out all the other issues.
Get good fruit.
Get some Vitamin D (not cod liver oil) and use it.
Get some Jarlsberg cheese from a health food store.
Get some buckwheat groats if you need a grain... otherwise get sweet potatoes or regular potatoes... like you'll read about here.
Go outside as much as possible and do easy outside work, or walk around (easy- no stress, no lactate buildup)

AS for me I need a grain that's where I differ here.... I can't eat wheat barley and rye... rice has no vitamins... oats are a little heavy for me to eat regularly... so I eat buckwheat pancakes (buckwheat, water, salt)...

If you eat cheese for a few days and not meat, your body can clear out excess ammonia and get relief from serotonin overload, etc.

Or if that's not for you, than try another lead.

What I want to say is : what you think is right... by all your effort, striving, thinking and feeling... do it. And if you think you should do nothing, then do nothing. But then really just do nothing so well and strongly that you get quickly tired of it and move on to the action.

The hard part: if you think you've "tried everything" then just try something else, gotta keep trying things, (that's what I meant about will power to try again after many failures: now that's where you're probably at---- thinking you've tried everything, so you will now have to try everything else.... and if you still haven't succeeded, then you'll have to try the rest after that, etc.)

Okay... enough sermonizing...

Just make sure you stay alive and don't go have a stroke or something...

Also: There's room for bald men in this world...
So there's room for a few hairy women too, no problem.

Okay whatever is written is written here goes the submit button. No offense, I only mean well.

@WilltoBelieve Thanx....I know you mean no harm with your posts:)
You seem like a very nice man....and very cool that you have your own farm!

"This is what I'm trying to say: value your life so much that you will do whatever it takes to preserve it and improve it. People who have easy lives and no problems won't understand you... but never mind them."

From a fairly early age I never had it 'easy' so to say and was prematurely forced into 'an adult world' in regards to dealing/handling stuff,so I've been on&off therapy from age 10. I guess that's part of(the mental part,though I'm sure there's a physical part for it too just don't know what it is anymore) the 'whacked out danger-survival-mechanism" that kicks in for no reason whenever things are going well/life is calm.

As for valueing life......I actually don't value it anymore as I'm keep being stuck in these emotional/mental swings (and during the racing anxious/depressive moments in this food vs. exercise vs. scared to become fat-cycle) and really don't know what I want anymore,as that also tends to shift with my whacked out moods/fears etc., and apart from that I'm busting my **** off to get a paid physical job preferrable outside but no such luck....as the unemployment is very high over here,I lack appropriate skills/degree,I'm schooled too highly,I'm too old,I'm female......I've heard it all numerous times. Years ago, I was trapped in this cycle of immense fear of dying out of nothing,for no reason and now I really don't care anymore just hope that'll be not too painful.
You mentioned the example of your friend's 'ignorance' and I'm truly sorry for that....but currently I feel like "God,I wish I were ignorant regarding everything like back in the days and just taking all the weird sh*t for granted like they told me to" bc now I'm trapped in this horrible cycle of 'knowing more/better' yet wanting to feel 'normal' and briefly doing so by eating wrong stuff in huge quantaties (actually I don't know what's wrong anymore) while not being able to just eat 3 meals a day....

There's also so much stuff out there regarding Candida&Estrogen&Progesterone(Candida&parasites feed on Sugar,Estrogen,Progesterone,fats,proteine,iron,magnesium,yeast....basically it robs one of virtually everything),Leaky Gut,hypo&hyperthyroidism(of which both the symptoms are a lot alike)

Basically body composition/leanness/fatgain at certain areas (I only love to have some more in my boobs) are all said to be metabollically/hormonal related (apart from exercise)....I just don't know anymore which rabbit sh*thole to start tackling the first...
 

kettlebell

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Hi Dutchie,

You have been given lots of useful informative supportive info now. So! less talk more action! Just start right now. You will learn as you go along. No one ever got anywhere by just talking about their issues and what they could do about them. Stop dwelling on how bad things are and take some positive steps.

Last thing I want to do is sound rude or mean but you need to make some changes, whether you like them or not for better health and you need to do it RIGHT NOW. I eat liver but hate it. I eat oysters but they make me want to be sick. I know over time I will get used to it and then start enjoying it. After I have eaten those things I feel the positive benefits of the nutrient content AND I feel pleased with myself that I had the discipline to do it which boosts my self esteem. It makes me realise I am responsible for me right now and I am in control, no one else.

Discipline: Doing what you need to do when you need to do it regardless of your mental state.

Start practicing discipline as many others around here do. We all falter and have bad moments but we pick ourselves back up, refocus and crack on. You will find you will falter less and less.

Get started!

When you have done some positive stuff moving in the right direction you will have some more questions and lots of helpful people here to answer them, people who are further along the road to recovery than you, people who unshackled those chains of negative habits and slowly but surely learned from their mistakes and are now rapidly moving in the right direction. You have some catching up to do ;-)

Best of luck

KB
 

kiran

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kettlebell said:
Discipline: Doing what you need to do when you need to do it regardless of your mental state.

Start practicing discipline as many others around here do. We all falter and have bad moments but we pick ourselves back up, refocus and crack on. You will find you will falter less and less.

Btw, sugar helps with discipline. Just so you know.
 
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Dutchie

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How does sugar help with discipline?

I've been a hard selfdisciplinarian my entire life,which also tired me out. What I actually always struggle with is finding and maintaining balance in everything
 

kiran

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Dutchie said:
How does sugar help with discipline?

I've been a hard selfdisciplinarian my entire life,which also tired me out. What I actually always struggle with is finding and maintaining balance in everything

Have you heard of ego depletion?

That's the idea that willpower is a finite resource.

http://youarenotsosmart.com/2012/04/17/ego-depletion/

...right after breakfast and lunch, your chances of getting paroled were at their highest. On average, the judges granted parole to around 60 percent of prisoners right after the judge had eaten a meal. The rate of approval crept down after that. Right before a meal, the judges granted parole to about 20 percent of those appearing before them. The less glucose in judges’ bodies, the less willing they were to make the active choice of setting a person free and accepting the consequences and the more likely they were to go with the passive choice to put the fate of the prisoner off until a future date.

The glucose correlation is made stronger by another study by Baumeister in 2007 in which he had people watch a silent video of a woman talking while words flashed in the lower right-hand corner. The subjects’ task was to try as best they could to ignore the words. The scientists tested blood glucose levels before and after the video and compared them to a control group who watched the video without special instructions. Sure enough, the people who avoided the words had lower blood glucose levels after the video than the control group.
 

charlie

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Kiran, that is very interesting. Thank you for posting that.
 
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Dutchie

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kiran said:
Dutchie said:
How does sugar help with discipline?

I've been a hard selfdisciplinarian my entire life,which also tired me out. What I actually always struggle with is finding and maintaining balance in everything

Have you heard of ego depletion?

That's the idea that willpower is a finite resource.

http://youarenotsosmart.com/2012/04/17/ego-depletion/

...right after breakfast and lunch, your chances of getting paroled were at their highest. On average, the judges granted parole to around 60 percent of prisoners right after the judge had eaten a meal. The rate of approval crept down after that. Right before a meal, the judges granted parole to about 20 percent of those appearing before them. The less glucose in judges’ bodies, the less willing they were to make the active choice of setting a person free and accepting the consequences and the more likely they were to go with the passive choice to put the fate of the prisoner off until a future date.

The glucose correlation is made stronger by another study by Baumeister in 2007 in which he had people watch a silent video of a woman talking while words flashed in the lower right-hand corner. The subjects’ task was to try as best they could to ignore the words. The scientists tested blood glucose levels before and after the video and compared them to a control group who watched the video without special instructions. Sure enough, the people who avoided the words had lower blood glucose levels after the video than the control group.

It says glucose,which don't necessarily have to mean sugar but can be just some form of carb....:)
 

kiran

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Dutchie said:
It says glucose,which don't necessarily have to mean sugar but can be just some form of carb....:)

ofc, but sugar works the best. :D
 
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Dutchie

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kiran said:
Dutchie said:
It says glucose,which don't necessarily have to mean sugar but can be just some form of carb....:)

ofc, but sugar works the best. :D

I'm still on the fence if sugar is that good for me.....though it might be different if I'd actually got my act together/dare to face my fears&anxiety and started making&eating homemade meals at home.....and at least use a type of sugar with some nutrients still left in it,like coconut/palmsugar.....
 

BingDing

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Dutchie said:
kiran said:
Dutchie said:
It says glucose,which don't necessarily have to mean sugar but can be just some form of carb....:)

ofc, but sugar works the best. :D

I'm still on the fence if sugar is that good for me.....though it might be different if I'd actually got my act together/dare to face my fears&anxiety and started making&eating homemade meals at home.....and at least use a type of sugar with some nutrients still left in it,like coconut/palmsugar.....

Not to worry, Dutchie, I bet almost everyone has had that debate with themselves. Lord knows how many diet cokes I've had, thinking sugar was bad. The music never stops, we live and learn.

There is a long thread here about Ray Peat eating, it's one of the friendliest and supportive online discussions I've ever seen. There are some posts from diabetics who found the sugar didn't have any effect on their blood glucose. That's from gals who check their blood glucose multiple times a day, and they were surprised by the readings because it's contrary to everything they had been told.

Peat appeals to me because his fundamental premiss in unassailable. Aerobic energy production in the mitochondria of every cell (except red blood cells) is the gold standard of energy and health. That's glucose + O2 => CO2 + 17 ATP molecules per cycle (ATP=energy used inside the cells). Everything Peat advises is about keeping that reaction active and strong.

FWIW, I still vote for magnesium as the first hole to dig yourself out of. There is no down side and a huge up side. At the risk of being blunt, and not intending any offense, trying it a couple times and not liking how it made you feel is sort of lame, IMHO. You have the stuff, 25 sprays spread over as much skin as possible, preferably after a hot bath or shower, every other day for six weeks would be a fair test.

I just checked, the latest line in Las Vegas is 5 to 2 that you're going to be healthy in less than a year. I put $100 on you, Dutchie, don't let me down!
 

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