Christmas, Time Of The Year When People Feel Entitled To Your Money

[DaveFoster]

You caved to the "do-gooder" pressure.

They helped my dad out back in the 30s.

 

[scarlettsmum]

You caved to the "do-gooder" pressure.

 

[amethyst]

They helped my dad out back in the 30s.

Well that's nice to hear. I think the organization was more about helping people back then. Now it is a major corporation with lots of overhead.

 

[scarlettsmum]

Ha! Methinks he didn't really want to speak to hubby but did so simply to save face.

Anyway...well, ho ho ho! Good luck, and just try letting it all go. 'Tisn't the season for annoyance and letting mofo's get us down, after all. :)

Exactly and thanks, I see it all as an opportunity to practice saying NO! My husband is very encouraging rather than leaving it to him.

 

[amethyst]

Very well said. I need to work more on my assertivity, usually I just say that my husband deals with financial matters and that way I get rid of the responsibility of having to give them an answer on the spot.:) With regards to the contractor, he's got some nerve, asked for $800 in advance!! What on earth is he buying?! Can't be an engagement ring, not quite enough!! Crazy!
I agree with giving to less fortunate and I often donate nice clothes, and send money to a local charity providing homes and safe carers for children from unstable families. And I love how transparent it all is. I just can't stand faceless give me money guilt trips and people asking for ridiculous donations acting as though it's completely normal. I too crave nothing more than spending time with my nearest family by the fire, watching Xmas films and eating flour filled biscuits. And you can't put a price on that.:)

He asked for $800 without doing any work?????

 

[scarlettsmum]

He asked for $800 without doing any work?????

No, he did some work for us already, but asked for an advanced payment. This is a person who shows up when he feels like it, so not exactly certainty that he'll actually show up to do the work.

 

[whodathunkit]

They helped my dad out back in the 30s.

Jeez. How old is your dad? My grandmother was an adult of childbearing age in the 30's and she was 85 when she died 21 years ago.

 

[DaveFoster]

Jeez. How old is your dad? My grandmother was an adult of childbearing age in the 30's and she was 85 when she died 21 years ago.

He's in his eighties.

 

[whodathunkit]

He's in his eighties.

Oh wow, a real Great Depression baby. I just assumed because you're a whippersnapper that your parents were younger, too. Maybe my age.

Interesting mindset that generation has. My mother is 80. :)

 

[DaveFoster]

Oh wow, a real Great Depression baby. I just assumed because you're a whippersnapper that your parents were younger, too. Maybe my age.

Interesting mindset that generation has. My mother is 80. :)

Very; wise and holistic, but my dad's humor was not PC by today's standards. He was a funny guy though. There's never any hurry for the tree to grow to its full height. Where did it go...

I love meeting people over sixty (rather seventy, thinking this was years ago); they don't care, which makes their experiences the most unadulterated.

 

[goodandevil]

I don't hate the people who are standing outside in the cold, ringing their bells for hours upon end. They are just doing a job. Hard to find in Obama's economy But what I strongly dislike is the fact that they are placed right at the entrance to each store, where you can't avoid them. It's like they are saying you are obligated to give to my organization because it's Christmas time. Well, if you do any research into the different organizations such as Salvation Army, you realize that not every donation you give, goes to the people who need it the most. Rather, much of it goes to the organization itself. And, a good many large Christian charities are notorious for not being upfront and truthful about just where the donations they receive, go.

Don't know if the Salvation Army is catholic or not, but the Catholic church sure has a market on guilt tripping it's devoted followers.

You make a point, i thought they volunteered. I realized somewhat recently that every holdiay we get is a break from one trap, just to suck us into a other one. veteran's day, labor day, christmas, easter, we're supposed to be at church, we're supposed to be encouraging war, paying our union fee &etc. I guess we're supposed to be drinking on saturday, maybe that's the one day that's truly ours.

Anyways, protestant. this salvation army thing is interestijg, reminds me of scientology. the generalissimo rakes in a lot of cash: André Cox - Wikipedia

Salvation army is there for generous tax writeoffs. That George Foreman grill u bought in 1993? You already know that's at least $100 in 2016 dollars!

 

[goodandevil]

Well that's nice to hear. I think the organization was more about helping people back then. Now it is a major corporation with lots of overhead.

"John D. Rockefeller (JDR) created the Laura Spelman Rockefeller Memorial (LSRM) in 1918 as a way to honor and support his late wife’s charitable causes. During its decade-long existence, he donated some $74 million to the Memorial. After a few initial years of conventional charitable giving to Baptist churches and other large organizations like the Salvation Army, the Boy Scouts and Girl Scouts, and the YMCA and YWCA, LSRM began to pursue goals in the social sciences more congruent with the “scientific philanthropy” of other Rockefeller organizations.
"

 

[Regina]

Exactly and thanks, I see it all as an opportunity to practice saying NO! My husband is very encouraging rather than leaving it to him.

I live in a major city. So to get out of my house and go literally anywhere at all, I must walk through a gauntlet of panhandlers and people w clipboards asking for money.
I used to get mauled. I noted a few months after I started taking aikido that panhandlers would often make millisecond eye contact with me and then go on to ask the next person. These are the pros. But the college kids with clipboards have not developed any sensitivity to their playing field.

 

[whodathunkit]

I love meeting people over sixty (rather seventy, thinking this was years ago); they don't care, which makes their experiences the most unadulterated.

Yeah, when you hit 50 is when you begin to loosen up and not give a rat's. It's pretty cool.

George Carlin used to say that people were interesting up until about age 5,when they became boring, unoriginal, and uninteresting. Then they remained that way until they hit 50, when they'd either learned how to beat the game, which made them interesting, or they were completely defeated and effed up, which also made them interesting.

I was in my 20's when I first heard that, and I didn't get it. Now I totally do.

 

[amethyst]

You make a point, i thought they volunteered. I realized somewhat recently that every holdiay we get is a break from one trap, just to suck us into a other one. veteran's day, labor day, christmas, easter, we're supposed to be at church, we're supposed to be encouraging war, paying our union fee &etc. I guess we're supposed to be drinking on saturday, maybe that's the one day that's truly ours.

Do they volunteer? I thought they were paid. Oh I agree with you on the holidays. Well at the store I went to today, they had a new hook to get you to walk over and drop in your cash.....the guy was standing there with his cute dog Everyone was saying what a nice dog it was (it was cute, I'll admit) and then of course, they gave him a donation LOL

It's that ole doggie trick that everyone falls for, including myself

Salvation army is there for generous tax writeoffs.

Yep, definitely. I think they probably help on some level, but really, it's all about the money. Maybe it started out ok but then....well, you know how that goes in our society......

 

[whodathunkit]

when they became boring, unoriginal, and uninteresting.

LOL, sorry guys, I just realized I insulted a large swath of this board's demographics. I'm sorry. I didn't mean it that way. The main point was that getting older can be pretty cool. :)

 

[goodandevil]

Eie

 

[Dr.Winston O'Boogie]

If somebody has the 'front' to ask then I'm quite comfortable with having the front to give them a blunt 'no'.

One incident that really annoyed me was a street collector for a charity. I dipped into my pocket and pulled out a couple of pounds to donate...only to be told that this wasn't an option as what they wanted was a regular donation directly from my bank account, WTF? I just walked off saying it was a sad day when I couldn't even be charitable under my own terms!

 

[Birdie]

One thing that gets me is the periodic asking for a charity donation at the supermarket checkout. I've started asking in a sweetish matter of fact voice (I hope) how long the drive will be going on. Then, sort of sigh, and say something about looking forward to the end of it. And have an attitude of assuming the cashier feels the same... Doesn't do any good to change things, but I feel better for standing up rather than before when I said no and felt angry or guilty. I'm there to buy food!

But, with the Salvation Army (it's not Catholic btw), I want to remember my earplugs. Those bells hurt. Luckily, this year they are at one entrance so I circle around to the other one.

 

[amethyst]

What about just helping a friend or family or whoever you know who is down on their luck and give them some money to help them out, to get by. What a concept. Actually giving money to help someone in need and knowing it is going to them and them alone.That's far better "charity" than any of those rich, over-inflated organizations that need (beg for)your money to keep their big profit machines going, line their pockets and then give what little they have left over to the people who really need it.