A Rant: Do You Ever Just Feel Like A Faulty Model And The Odds Are Stacked Against You?

[thisoldtown1978]

30 now. Was balding at a very very early age, too young and uninformed to reassess my health, extremely sensitive digestion, remember having times of really stressful feelings when I was a kid, stressful relationship with parents, no great friends growing up, low energy, grumpy, anxious, always nervous, never really been happy in myself.

Feel like I'm trying everything and my body just feels like it's resisting at every turn. Still skinny fat now matter how much I work out, still bald, digestion so sensitive, still anxious, still an overthinker.

But I try to be a really good person. I always listen, I always help where I can.

Sometimes, being conscious of your health really sucks, and can really be emotionally painful.

Just as a disclaimer, I don't always feel this way! Usually fairly positive, but every now and again, it gets to me. Just wanted a place to let it out.

Thanks.

 

[cyclops]

yeah man, I feel you and also feel for you. But there really is something to positive thinking and not falling into a victim mindset, which is so easy to do. We have to do our absolute best to not let negativity sink in. Always do the best you can. Find something you really like to do and do the ***t out of it. Eat the best you can. Meditate. Do all good healthy things for yourself, take care of yourself and love yourself. Keep your mind and actions positive and proactive -- do this so often and all the time so it becomes and almost an effortless habit. And yeah sometimes its great to be able to let it out and express negative feelings and emotions to someone, I dont think its healthy to keep it in out of fear of judgement if you've been feeling down -- we're all human and all get down and feel defeated at times - it seems the world lacks compassion and empathy at times. But try to get back to positivity and being proactive and doing healthy and engaging things asap, so you can do your best to feel good.

 

[methylenewhite]

30 now. Was balding at a very very early age, too young and uninformed to reassess my health, extremely sensitive digestion, remember having times of really stressful feelings when I was a kid, stressful relationship with parents, no great friends growing up, low energy, grumpy, anxious, always nervous, never really been happy in myself.

Feel like I'm trying everything and my body just feels like it's resisting at every turn. Still skinny fat now matter how much I work out, still bald, digestion so sensitive, still anxious, still an overthinker.

But I try to be a really good person. I always listen, I always help where I can.

Sometimes, being conscious of your health really sucks, and can really be emotionally painful.

Just as a disclaimer, I don't always feel this way! Usually fairly positive, but every now and again, it gets to me. Just wanted a place to let it out.

Thanks.

I'm the same plus chronic depression and rare skin disease. No balding.

 

[Arnold Grape]

30 now. Was balding at a very very early age, too young and uninformed to reassess my health, extremely sensitive digestion, remember having times of really stressful feelings when I was a kid, stressful relationship with parents, no great friends growing up, low energy, grumpy, anxious, always nervous, never really been happy in myself.

Feel like I'm trying everything and my body just feels like it's resisting at every turn. Still skinny fat now matter how much I work out, still bald, digestion so sensitive, still anxious, still an overthinker.

But I try to be a really good person. I always listen, I always help where I can.

Sometimes, being conscious of your health really sucks, and can really be emotionally painful.

Just as a disclaimer, I don't always feel this way! Usually fairly positive, but every now and again, it gets to me. Just wanted a place to let it out.

Thanks.

You should check out DFW’s commencement address at Kenyon College (This Is Water), and also, hang in there! I have also felt prone to a specific preset, although by and large I have had a decent life, when you objectively examine the facts. I do think that environmental factors that include food and its role in forming hormones largely determines emotional outlook — which is malleable, primarily based on what you’re eating. Therefore, you should try to adjust environmental factors enough to tilt negative concepts as much as possible.

 

[TheBeard]

30 now. Was balding at a very very early age, too young and uninformed to reassess my health, extremely sensitive digestion, remember having times of really stressful feelings when I was a kid, stressful relationship with parents, no great friends growing up, low energy, grumpy, anxious, always nervous, never really been happy in myself.

Feel like I'm trying everything and my body just feels like it's resisting at every turn. Still skinny fat now matter how much I work out, still bald, digestion so sensitive, still anxious, still an overthinker.

But I try to be a really good person. I always listen, I always help where I can.

Sometimes, being conscious of your health really sucks, and can really be emotionally painful.

Just as a disclaimer, I don't always feel this way! Usually fairly positive, but every now and again, it gets to me. Just wanted a place to let it out.

Thanks.

Have you
1) taken antibiotics at a young age?
2) tried testosterone recently to see if your symptoms get alleviated?

 

[hei]

Most of the time. I have never been very lean. Not when I did nothing and was skinny, not when I weighed 65kg (still skinny) and was cycling 25km a day and doing some bodyweight exercise, not when I weighed more and was lifting weights regularly and eating more or less. My body seems to preferentially lose muscle when calories are restricted and gain fat when they aren't. I feel pretty fragile and have never been able to follow an exercise program for more than a few months without incurring some kind of injury that undoes everything. I still can't sleep well, have flaky skin all over my body and seborrheic dermatitis on my scalp and face. I'm not a handsome man, have had little social contact for most of my life, been nervous and anxious for as long as I can remember, always had horrifically bad motor skills to the point that I think some developmental disorder must be involved.
I have never noticed any particular connection between my diet and mental state or physical condition, apart from that eating a diet consisting mostly of fast food leads to feeling pretty run down and a couple of foods give me the runs a bit (tomato paste, wholegrain wheat with fat [pasta pesto, wheat biscuits with whole milk]). But I have gone long periods with and without eating gluten/dairy/potatoes/tomatoes/fruit juice/"goitrogenic vegetables" and probably various other things, without ever noticing any general or particular change to how I feel whether they're included or excluded.
Supplements mostly do nothing for me; using a multivitamin when my diet isn't great improves my sleep a bit and makes my hangnails heal (it worries me that they seem to indicate nutrient deficiency for me, as I had them chronically throughout my childhood and adolescence).
The only things that have really changed are my physical condition (much worse as a result of exercise than it would ever have been without it) and that over time I have learnt that things are mostly outside my control.

 

[GreekDemiGod]

Careful your inner dialogue. The Law of Attraction is always in action. You just re-affirmed bad things for yourself in this post.

 

[LUH 3417]

Careful your inner dialogue. The Law of Attraction is always in action. You just re-affirmed bad things for yourself in this post.

So by that logic the entire world is summoning a viral outbreak that is limiting basic freedoms? Come on

 

[TheBeard]

So by that logic the entire world is summoning a viral outbreak that is limiting basic freedoms? Come on

Being extreme and sarcastic won't prove him wrong

 

[LUH 3417]

Being extreme and sarcastic won't prove him wrong

How am I being extreme and sarcastic? I am using an analogy to prove my point.

 

[thisoldtown1978]

yeah man, I feel you and also feel for you. But there really is something to positive thinking and not falling into a victim mindset, which is so easy to do. We have to do our absolute best to not let negativity sink in. Always do the best you can. Find something you really like to do and do the ***t out of it. Eat the best you can. Meditate. Do all good healthy things for yourself, take care of yourself and love yourself. Keep your mind and actions positive and proactive -- do this so often and all the time so it becomes and almost an effortless habit. And yeah sometimes its great to be able to let it out and express negative feelings and emotions to someone, I dont think its healthy to keep it in out of fear of judgement if you've been feeling down -- we're all human and all get down and feel defeated at times - it seems the world lacks compassion and empathy at times. But try to get back to positivity and being proactive and doing healthy and engaging things asap, so you can do your best to feel good.

Thanks man. I definitely need to work on the meditating and mindfuless. I'm actually a really positive and proactive guy. I run my own business which is doing well, and in my social circles I'd probably be characterised as the upbeat one.

But just as much, when I'm alone or bored, I'm prone to long overthinking sessions that get far to analytical and abstract, and I believe I might be underestimating the impact this can have on my health.

Thanks for your advice.

 

[thisoldtown1978]

I'm the same plus chronic depression and rare skin disease. No balding.

Sorry to hear that mate. Have you experienced any relief from your skin disease since implementing any Peat ideas?

 

[thisoldtown1978]

You should check out DFW’s commencement address at Kenyon College (This Is Water), and also, hang in there! I have also felt prone to a specific preset, although by and large I have had a decent life, when you objectively examine the facts. I do think that environmental factors that include food and its role in forming hormones largely determines emotional outlook — which is malleable, primarily based on what you’re eating. Therefore, you should try to adjust environmental factors enough to tilt negative concepts as much as possible.

Thanks, I'll definitely check it out. I think that's what's frustrating. I do wholeheartedly believe it's a result of my environment, but the real challenge is piecing that puzzle together. And with our environment being so messed up these days, with synthetic hormones and chemicals and EMFs etc, it's almost impossible to get it just right. Which brings me to the point - if you're not a very robust human being who can handle some stressors once in a while, it really feels like an uphill struggle. And I'm starting to think that this is a consequence of poor early life circumstances weakening or undermining the human organism.

 

[thisoldtown1978]

Have you
1) taken antibiotics at a young age?
2) tried testosterone recently to see if your symptoms get alleviated?

1. Yes, I believe I did take antibiotics for something when I was growing up. Maybe once or twice. I'll ask my parents. Why?

2. No, but recent tests showed my testosterone as quite high, and also my SHBG as high. What makes you think this would alleviate symptoms?

 

[Auslander]

30 now. Was balding at a very very early age, too young and uninformed to reassess my health, extremely sensitive digestion, remember having times of really stressful feelings when I was a kid, stressful relationship with parents, no great friends growing up, low energy, grumpy, anxious, always nervous, never really been happy in myself.

Feel like I'm trying everything and my body just feels like it's resisting at every turn. Still skinny fat now matter how much I work out, still bald, digestion so sensitive, still anxious, still an overthinker.

But I try to be a really good person. I always listen, I always help where I can.

Sometimes, being conscious of your health really sucks, and can really be emotionally painful.

Just as a disclaimer, I don't always feel this way! Usually fairly positive, but every now and again, it gets to me. Just wanted a place to let it out.

Thanks.

You say you "try to be a good person". Im currious why you said that, i.e. what relevance you see in this in connection with what troubles you. Maybe you dont need to try to be a good person. I know a lot of happy &ssholes. Including myself. I honestly dont think being a good person is a predisposition for happiness. Especially if you have to "try".

 

[TheBeard]

1. Yes, I believe I did take antibiotics for something when I was growing up. Maybe once or twice. I'll ask my parents. Why?

2. No, but recent tests showed my testosterone as quite high, and also my SHBG as high. What makes you think this would alleviate symptoms?

An unaltered microbiome usually makes for a properly functioning neurotransmetter system.

If your test is high there is probably no benefit in trying supraphysiological levels

 

[thisoldtown1978]

Most of the time. I have never been very lean. Not when I did nothing and was skinny, not when I weighed 65kg (still skinny) and was cycling 25km a day and doing some bodyweight exercise, not when I weighed more and was lifting weights regularly and eating more or less. My body seems to preferentially lose muscle when calories are restricted and gain fat when they aren't. I feel pretty fragile and have never been able to follow an exercise program for more than a few months without incurring some kind of injury that undoes everything. I still can't sleep well, have flaky skin all over my body and seborrheic dermatitis on my scalp and face. I'm not a handsome man, have had little social contact for most of my life, been nervous and anxious for as long as I can remember, always had horrifically bad motor skills to the point that I think some developmental disorder must be involved.
I have never noticed any particular connection between my diet and mental state or physical condition, apart from that eating a diet consisting mostly of fast food leads to feeling pretty run down and a couple of foods give me the runs a bit (tomato paste, wholegrain wheat with fat [pasta pesto, wheat biscuits with whole milk]). But I have gone long periods with and without eating gluten/dairy/potatoes/tomatoes/fruit juice/"goitrogenic vegetables" and probably various other things, without ever noticing any general or particular change to how I feel whether they're included or excluded.
Supplements mostly do nothing for me; using a multivitamin when my diet isn't great improves my sleep a bit and makes my hangnails heal (it worries me that they seem to indicate nutrient deficiency for me, as I had them chronically throughout my childhood and adolescence).
The only things that have really changed are my physical condition (much worse as a result of exercise than it would ever have been without it) and that over time I have learnt that things are mostly outside my control.

Sorry to hear that. Sounds like you're having a tough time. At least you've identified some things that have negative effects on your health? In fact, the positive impact this diet has had on my health has come from what I'm avoiding, not what I'm taking in more of. I think this is the oft forgotten side of the equation. Hope you find some answers.

 

[GreekDemiGod]

How come you are not more confident with high T levels? Something doesn't add up.

 

[thisoldtown1978]

You say you "try to be a good person". Im currious why you said that, i.e. what relevance you see in this in connection with what troubles you. Maybe you dont need to try to be a good person. I know a lot of happy &ssholes. Including myself. I honestly dont think being a good person is a predisposition for happiness. Especially if you have to "try".

I understand why you're curious about that; reading it back I thought it was strange that I felt the need to write that. I think it's because I often go out of my way to be a positive and helpful person even when my health makes me feel like retreating or lashing out at people. I understand there's a need to look after yourself first and foremost, but also there's a lot of unkindness in the world, and the least I can do, even if I'm in ***t health, is make a positive atmosphere for others. Don't get me wrong, I'm not some Disney character going around whistling and doing good deeds for strangers. But I try to be consistent and considerate. Maybe it comes from a fear that if I'm in poor health and an ***hole then...I've got nothing...?

 

[thisoldtown1978]

How come you are not more confident with high T levels? Something doesn't add up.

I know, beats me. Don't get me wrong; I'm not a shrew, I'm a pretty bullish guy most of the time, and hairy AF lol, and do what I think I should do. But I still have anxiety around my life and where I'm going and getting older. I get frazzled, if you get me. But I'm still confident. Don't know if I've explained that well.

Or it's getting converted to estrogen? Pretty sure my last tests said estradiol as fine though...

Don't know man. I'm confused too.