Long time no see RP forum! 
So I drink caffeine. Doesn't have to be a lot, maybe 90 mg. Then I focus my energy on positivity, so it doesn't make me more negative (which I think is normal for neurotics). The result is completely normal with higher physical and mental energy and better mood.
I don't notice anything initially, on some occassions I wasn't aware of caffeine content. Caffeine gives me energy and also relaxes me mentally. But later, I notice these kinds of things:
Drowsiness and sometimes sleep (I usually try to sleep during this time)
Belief that other people are in the room (especially after a dream) I don't see them, but believe that they are responsible for me feeling uncomfortable on the bed, or they could be going about their own errends, etc. I don't actually see them, I just stayed in a place with roommates for many months and I'm used to that.
Belief that I am completely someone else (only happened once, and right after awakening from a dream in this state)
Paranoia (Happened once that I heard noises and thought someone sneaked into my room or would)
Ridiculous degree of weakness (I'm usually weak, maybe due to demotivation, and caffeine initially helps a lot. But this is the degree that walking a few meters is something I don't like the thought of. Bending over to pick something up is hard to do)
Bad coordination (Mine is already bad, but this state makes it worse)
Objects rippling or moving when I stare at them. I could see a doorknob in a bathroom shifting upward each time I looked at it. Curtains still appear to move though I could make this thread.
Repetitive and meaningless thought patterns
No response to more caffeine. If this is a crash, then why doesn't more caffeine fix it? I usually drank some soda with smaller amounts of caffeine, to no avail.
No improvement from any supplement I currently have.
No improvement from heat or a hot shower
No improvement from protein, sugar, sodium, aspirin, or water.
Meaningless laughter and eccentric behavior (this was from two years ago)
Head fantasies going wild, sometimes to the point of losing awake awareness, but losing memory of what happened, so it seems like I slept, but it seems to have been too short for that.
Stupidity (I am clumsy in general, and caffeine temporarily makes me function better, but then it reverses and my brain is mush)
Exasperation of original problems which caffeine temporarily cured. My legs are less restless and achy when I take caffeine. I also get less cold goosebumps, am more relaxed, etc. But later the symptoms are even worse than before.
Ear plugging and tingling hands (got tingling hands today after drinking a coffee. Ears plug if I haven't drank caffeine in some time)
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I speculated it's low potassium, but I used to drink tons of OJ and got negative responses. However, I had chronic diarrhea from it too, which may have depleted potassium.
In any case, I have not encountered the degree of the symptoms I had in the past, and my potassium consumption is low.
Low magnesium- Possibly?
Low copper or zinc- Possibly?
Anemia- My hemoglobin and other parameters actually got WORSE after moving to the mountains, which I worry is the reason that I got much weaker than before. However, I had weakness even with elevated parameters, and caffeine had bad effects. Plus, my veins are nice and large, and my face has no loss of complexion.
Thyroid- T3 doesn't seem to do much, in fact caffeine initially acts better, particularly if I focus the energy so it's positive. But unfortunately a bag with mine was stolen.
Will I be able to somehow use caffeine like a normal person (or like when I was a preteen/teen) and eliminate the weird "crash" or whatever it is? I would be extremely disappointed if that weren't the case. It works great at first, when the effects wear off, then everything seems to be worse than before any caffeine. It would be very hard to get by with weakness in the situation that I'm in.
Any suspicions as to what may be wrong will be appreciated.
So I drink caffeine. Doesn't have to be a lot, maybe 90 mg. Then I focus my energy on positivity, so it doesn't make me more negative (which I think is normal for neurotics). The result is completely normal with higher physical and mental energy and better mood.
I don't notice anything initially, on some occassions I wasn't aware of caffeine content. Caffeine gives me energy and also relaxes me mentally. But later, I notice these kinds of things:
Drowsiness and sometimes sleep (I usually try to sleep during this time)
Belief that other people are in the room (especially after a dream) I don't see them, but believe that they are responsible for me feeling uncomfortable on the bed, or they could be going about their own errends, etc. I don't actually see them, I just stayed in a place with roommates for many months and I'm used to that.
Belief that I am completely someone else (only happened once, and right after awakening from a dream in this state)
Paranoia (Happened once that I heard noises and thought someone sneaked into my room or would)
Ridiculous degree of weakness (I'm usually weak, maybe due to demotivation, and caffeine initially helps a lot. But this is the degree that walking a few meters is something I don't like the thought of. Bending over to pick something up is hard to do)
Bad coordination (Mine is already bad, but this state makes it worse)
Objects rippling or moving when I stare at them. I could see a doorknob in a bathroom shifting upward each time I looked at it. Curtains still appear to move though I could make this thread.
Repetitive and meaningless thought patterns
No response to more caffeine. If this is a crash, then why doesn't more caffeine fix it? I usually drank some soda with smaller amounts of caffeine, to no avail.
No improvement from any supplement I currently have.
No improvement from heat or a hot shower
No improvement from protein, sugar, sodium, aspirin, or water.
Meaningless laughter and eccentric behavior (this was from two years ago)
Head fantasies going wild, sometimes to the point of losing awake awareness, but losing memory of what happened, so it seems like I slept, but it seems to have been too short for that.
Stupidity (I am clumsy in general, and caffeine temporarily makes me function better, but then it reverses and my brain is mush)
Exasperation of original problems which caffeine temporarily cured. My legs are less restless and achy when I take caffeine. I also get less cold goosebumps, am more relaxed, etc. But later the symptoms are even worse than before.
Ear plugging and tingling hands (got tingling hands today after drinking a coffee. Ears plug if I haven't drank caffeine in some time)
==========
==========
==========
I speculated it's low potassium, but I used to drink tons of OJ and got negative responses. However, I had chronic diarrhea from it too, which may have depleted potassium.
In any case, I have not encountered the degree of the symptoms I had in the past, and my potassium consumption is low.
Low magnesium- Possibly?
Low copper or zinc- Possibly?
Anemia- My hemoglobin and other parameters actually got WORSE after moving to the mountains, which I worry is the reason that I got much weaker than before. However, I had weakness even with elevated parameters, and caffeine had bad effects. Plus, my veins are nice and large, and my face has no loss of complexion.
Thyroid- T3 doesn't seem to do much, in fact caffeine initially acts better, particularly if I focus the energy so it's positive. But unfortunately a bag with mine was stolen.
Will I be able to somehow use caffeine like a normal person (or like when I was a preteen/teen) and eliminate the weird "crash" or whatever it is? I would be extremely disappointed if that weren't the case. It works great at first, when the effects wear off, then everything seems to be worse than before any caffeine. It would be very hard to get by with weakness in the situation that I'm in.
Any suspicions as to what may be wrong will be appreciated.
