Suggestions For Borderline?

Frankdee20

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I had a loved one think this is possible with me. I have many traits of Borderline personality for a male. Does anyone have suggestions on what can help ? Supplements or otherwise ? Low GABA ? I drink way too much. Low Dopamine ? Novelty seeking in general. The stupid push pull thing in Relations with people.
 

Dhair

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Were you abused as a child? I am only asking because this seems to be common among people with BPD. Schizophrenia too.
 

Frankdee20

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Were you abused as a child? I am only asking because this seems to be common among people with BPD. Schizophrenia too.

No, but the home life early on was highlighted by bickering, drama queen mother, depression was strong in my dad, really awful parents. No self esteem was ever developed. Now in adulthood, I must function with out any.
 

Frankdee20

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I just want to believe that I can overcome some patterns and try to have as optimal a life possible. The drinking and mental health issues need my best efforts to overcome
 

Frankdee20

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Thanks. The only thing I haven’t tried is NDT or simply Thyroid. But mental health issues often are the gateway to drinking for me.
 

Frankdee20

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Oh yeah, I should be trying progesterone for the GABA Effect. Pregnenalone was too inconsistent
 

Tarmander

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I think of borderline basically as an emptiness that is managed by the person through drama and excitement. Kind of like, when exciting things stop happening, there is extreme discomfort. You constantly need the next thing or you do not feel alive. I think the fact that you acknowledge that you have these tendencies is a really great thing as you have a chance of actually changing. I would do a few things

-I would watch many Youtube videos on borderlines and their behavior. The more you know about borderlines and how they are, the better. I would also watch videos of people who have had relationships with borderlines and what that does to them. Here are some channels with info on borderlines:
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCXNNG0ej_6rU9SxCZ4dyq6w/featured
Sam Vaknin

There are many other videos if you just search borderline personality disorder

-Boredom is like borderline's kryptonite. I would put yourself through things that you find boring, and lean into the pain of it. This will somewhat renew your dopamine receptors, and you will need less drama to get the same high. In other words, people will find it less terrible to be around you. In fact, pursuing things that are objectively not bad, (i.e cooking, cleaning, doing chores, taking walks, writing thank you notes), but which you find very boring and painful, is going to be your way out of this.

Be very careful in taking things that raise dopamine as whatever you do while dopamine is high becomes rewarding, and you will want to repeat it. If you are out causing drama and exciting yourself, and then take some dopamine agonist on top of that, you are setting yourself up for real dopamine depletion problems down the line.

-Get your sleep schedule fixed, eat breakfast and meals regularly. Getting up and go to sleep at the same time every-night will be painful and unexciting. The more you can go through the pain of discipline, the better you will be in the long run. Stop drinking, and go through that pain. Just stop doing things that give you pleasure and excitement and get to know yourself when you are not high.

Does any of this sound feasible?
 

Frankdee20

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I think of borderline basically as an emptiness that is managed by the person through drama and excitement. Kind of like, when exciting things stop happening, there is extreme discomfort. You constantly need the next thing or you do not feel alive. I think the fact that you acknowledge that you have these tendencies is a really great thing as you have a chance of actually changing. I would do a few things

-I would watch many Youtube videos on borderlines and their behavior. The more you know about borderlines and how they are, the better. I would also watch videos of people who have had relationships with borderlines and what that does to them. Here are some channels with info on borderlines:
An Ear for Men
Sam Vaknin

There are many other videos if you just search borderline personality disorder

-Boredom is like borderline's kryptonite. I would put yourself through things that you find boring, and lean into the pain of it. This will somewhat renew your dopamine receptors, and you will need less drama to get the same high. In other words, people will find it less terrible to be around you. In fact, pursuing things that are objectively not bad, (i.e cooking, cleaning, doing chores, taking walks, writing thank you notes), but which you find very boring and painful, is going to be your way out of this.

Be very careful in taking things that raise dopamine as whatever you do while dopamine is high becomes rewarding, and you will want to repeat it. If you are out causing drama and exciting yourself, and then take some dopamine agonist on top of that, you are setting yourself up for real dopamine depletion problems down the line.

-Get your sleep schedule fixed, eat breakfast and meals regularly. Getting up and go to sleep at the same time every-night will be painful and unexciting. The more you can go through the pain of discipline, the better you will be in the long run. Stop drinking, and go through that pain. Just stop doing things that give you pleasure and excitement and get to know yourself when you are not high.

Does any of this sound feasible?

You hit the nail on the head. Yes.
 

Frankdee20

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What herbs can help with depression that are Peat friendly ? SJW, Rhodiolla ?
 

Tarmander

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You hit the nail on the head. Yes.

Good. Your parents sound like crap, I am sorry for that. I would think of this as being the loving parent to yourself that you never had. Which means you have to help make the table each night for dinner, go to bed on time, get your homework done before going out to play, that kind of thing. Your parents did not give this to you when you were more malleable. That really sucks because now you have to do it when you are older, and that is harder. You can make it easier by doing Peat things as this supports your younger metabolism, kind of gets your into the child mind which is more amenable to the types of changes you need. I would test out certain herbs, cyproheptadine, niacinamide...for depression. Then I would take the least amount you can get away with where you will not tear yourself and your life to pieces. Then overtime work on leaning into the depression and sadness and lowering the dose of these things that help you get by.

For example, I really leaned on niacinamide for sleep and emotional regularity for the better part of two years. In that time, I worked on lowering stress and getting into a better environment, and I do not need niacinamide anymore to get by. I would find something like that for you that is not alcohol or other drugs that rob you overtime of your youthful metabolism. I hope that helps man.
 

Frankdee20

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Good. Your parents sound like crap, I am sorry for that. I would think of this as being the loving parent to yourself that you never had. Which means you have to help make the table each night for dinner, go to bed on time, get your homework done before going out to play, that kind of thing. Your parents did not give this to you when you were more malleable. That really sucks because now you have to do it when you are older, and that is harder. You can make it easier by doing Peat things as this supports your younger metabolism, kind of gets your into the child mind which is more amenable to the types of changes you need. I would test out certain herbs, cyproheptadine, niacinamide...for depression. Then I would take the least amount you can get away with where you will not tear yourself and your life to pieces. Then overtime work on leaning into the depression and sadness and lowering the dose of these things that help you get by.

For example, I really leaned on niacinamide for sleep and emotional regularity for the better part of two years. In that time, I worked on lowering stress and getting into a better environment, and I do not need niacinamide anymore to get by. I would find something like that for you that is not alcohol or other drugs that rob you overtime of your youthful metabolism. I hope that helps man.

Priceless. TY.
 

Frankdee20

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The more I watch videos about BPD the more amazed I get how I may have this. The whole thing with interpreting lack of immediate attention from someone as rejection; the mental lows that come from relationships; pushing people away to see if they’ll reject me, when in fact it’s the last thing I want; the whole lashing out and apologizing, it’s disgusting and pathetic.
 

Blossom

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The more I watch videos about BPD the more amazed I get how I may have this. The whole thing with interpreting lack of immediate attention from someone as rejection; the mental lows that come from relationships; pushing people away to see if they’ll reject me, when in fact it’s the last thing I want; the whole lashing out and apologizing, it’s disgusting and pathetic.
It's only disgusting and pathetic if you don't try to change. Try to be compassionate with yourself.
 

Frankdee20

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It's only disgusting and pathetic if you don't try to change. Try to be compassionate with yourself.

Thanks. Yeah, I need to buy insurance, or pay out of pocket for DBT sessions.
 
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