Motivation And Art Therapy

lindsay

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This might seem like a weird post, and I may not have categorized it correctly, but here goes anyhow.

Some of you may remember me from the Peatarian site, as well as here, but I disappeared for about a year because I decided that hyper-focusing on my health problems (which were many and which I am still working through, but which have gotten better) was making me depressed. Instead of doing things, I spent all my free time looking up stuff on the internet and spending way too much of my free time inside on my computer.

So in 2015, I decided to start a daily photography project (I work part-time as a photographer). I joined a community of photo enthusiasts and every day I had a prompt which I used to create a photo. It turned out to be this amazing journey that pushed my photography and skills and also a place where I met new friends, who I hope to keep in contact with for many many years.

In many respects, I never felt better than during that year. It boosted my confidence, kept my brain active, unleashed creative potential I never knew - it was amazing and I fell back in love with my camera and the art of photography. But then my life got busier, I had more work, and as I took better photos everyday, it became this expectation (which I put on myself) that I could create a brilliant image every day - and I got very stressed about it and very tired and when the year came to an end, I said goodbye to my project joyfully and decided I would embark on photography on my own when I choose......

Which brings me to my point - there are two other dear friends of mine who I met through this photography project who also found that the daily act of taking photos was very therapeutic and helped them with their struggles and depression. All three of us have struggled with varying forms of eating disorders and addictive behaviors, and in a way photography helped replace those things with something healthier. But now that I don't have daily "homework", I find it very difficult to motivate myself to pick up my camera and in turn, I've noticed the depression and serotonin are starting to creep back in and I'm not feeling as good as I was in 2015.

So I guess I am posing this to anyone out there - especially if you are an artist and have experienced this - where did you find the balance of your medium and the motivation to work with it consistently without going crazy? :) I believe that health is more than nutrition (though I understand the value of nutrition in the equation), but nothing truly helped me like expanding the creative half of the brain and I know Ray Peat is very much a believer in the arts and the importance of art in well-being. But now that the project has stopped, I am unmotivated to pick up my camera and it's making me depressed. My digestion has become worse sporadically (which furthers the depression) and food isn't helping the way my photo project did.

I take a slew of supplements (including thyroid, which has helped me greatly), but they do nothing in comparison to a project and goal. The problem is, when I do get my camera out, I end up spending hours obsessing over one photo and I don't always have time for this. The artist brain is in me - something I never realized until this past year. I'd like to explore it more without it stressing me out to the point of crazy - LOL :)

Would love to hear others' experience and things they found helpful to motivate them to explore art, but not become OCD about it - unless maybe that's a healthy thing? I need it as an outlet, and it's a big part of my work, but I am lacking that motivation outside of work.

Thank you for reading :) And I've attached a self portrait I took for my 2015 project which sums up my feelings as of late.
 

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jaguar43

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I was thinking about this quote when reading your post.


Painters and musicians have sometimes said that they use alcohol or other drugs to help them find their "own way.- Moving against the tide of the culture is an adaptive effort, and they find some neurological support in drugs. They are right in struggling against the current of imbecile conformity to find some creative truth, but there are better ways to sustain our energy and adaptive capacity. In some cases, good food and social fairness are enough to enliven people so that drugs are not attractive,and in other cases a more specific biochemical/energetic approach is needed.

-Ray Peat


When one works too much, I think it's important to adjust supplements and nutrition to fit the needs of the work demands. As for being more creative, Making sure you feel good if you feel something is off than it may not turn out well; unless you go with the flow. But also thinking that sometimes you need a break from your activity and to do other things. Trying to incorporate other things in your work seem to work well. Larger contexts seem to work too.

But from the photo you posted, it doesn't seem like you losing much ground though.
 
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Drareg

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I think about the ideal position or close to it, I don't have the finance for this position just yet but having notes on ideas for it helps me a lot.
I'm doing work in the same line as the ideal but not as creative, just about profit, it takes energy from you ,the system is rigged to exhaust you before you get any finance. I keep an eye for a position that may allow for creativity which also helps. Keep the hope up.

I am careful not bring all my time and creativity to a position for the wrong people, I made this mistake before, many people won't give you the support you need but have no problem taking credit for your creativity.

Not having strict timelines helps in general but in this global economic climate its essential, the financial system is a mess.

Some have mentioned high serotonin brings out perfectionism, not sure if it's from Peat.
In saying that criticism is a full time profitable job for people these days, it's everywhere and the more ruthless the more clicks they get, stay true to your art here or try be anonymous if you feel it's not entirely your work. Many of them are out of work,decide they will become a blogger ,they work tirelessly on social media to build a following, they have no clue about the pressures of an entrepreneur, whimsical shock criticism,constructive is rare these days.
This can increase perfectionism and cause you to freeze,sometimes the only way out is to laugh at the seriousness of it all.

Finding underlying patterns in your work can help for times when you are unmotivated, it can give the illusion of continual creativity to fit mainstream bells and whistles mentality. You could make this your style,it may be repetitive to you and easy but to others it seems remarkable, in that time you can be unmotivated and looking elsewhere or working on evolution of style.
True Artistic behaviour and breaking new ground will require unmotivated periods, I see this as a form of good sleep.
Unfortunetley the mainstream want no gaps on your resume and you probably need to pay bills, for me it is currently about being creative about periods for uncreativity.
Ticking boxes for me but for employers it looks creative.

I use other Art for inspiration, it's all the same underlying dynamics at work , what's also vital to remember is the connection to other people, thinking about them when you produce, if they are not that enlightened to your art it shows true creativity on your part to dangle the carrot so to speak, elevate their energy with it, to much elevation can cause shock for some.
I think with this pressure the laughing at the seriousness around any form of Art is important, when you compare human Art to the complexity of the inner workings of organisms you can't help but laugh.
 

artemis

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Dec 19, 2014
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196
Hi Lindsay,

The photo is great, but don't you think you should have moved the scene a hair to the right? :p Haha, just kidding, just poking fun at your perfectionism.

Yes, the old writer's block. I make my living as an artist, painting on canvas, and a muralist, painting on walls and ceilings. I am rarely unmotivated to create -- luckily there's so much work to do for clients, and then there's the stuff that I want to do for myself, new ideas always percolating in the back of my mind about things I want to try out. Once in awhile I do get stuck, and the best thing I can tell you is to just do it. Don't wait for motivation or inspiration. There's a wonderful quote about art by Pablo Picasso -- I have it hanging in my studio. It says: "Inspiration exists, but it has to find you working." In other words, the inspiration probably isn't just going to hit you over the head while you're watching TV or doing housework or whatever. It will come while you are working, doing your thing, creating. Just do it. So what if you take some crappy pictures in the meantime. Maybe place a new goal on yourself, a little less stressful, like one great photo a week?

As for obsessing over one photo forever, I have definitely been there and done that with paintings, and murals, too. I just sometimes don't know when to stop. That's when I think of my other favorite quote about art, by Leonardo daVinci: "Art is never finished, only abandoned." So true for me. I don't consider any work I've ever done to be "finished," there's always more I want to do. I just force myself to abandon it, and move on.

I'm sure you will eventually find that sweet spot between working too much and too little! :artpalette:
 
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lindsay

lindsay

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Hi Lindsay,

The photo is great, but don't you think you should have moved the scene a hair to the right? :p Haha, just kidding, just poking fun at your perfectionism.

Yes, the old writer's block. I make my living as an artist, painting on canvas, and a muralist, painting on walls and ceilings. I am rarely unmotivated to create -- luckily there's so much work to do for clients, and then there's the stuff that I want to do for myself, new ideas always percolating in the back of my mind about things I want to try out. Once in awhile I do get stuck, and the best thing I can tell you is to just do it. Don't wait for motivation or inspiration. There's a wonderful quote about art by Pablo Picasso -- I have it hanging in my studio. It says: "Inspiration exists, but it has to find you working." In other words, the inspiration probably isn't just going to hit you over the head while you're watching TV or doing housework or whatever. It will come while you are working, doing your thing, creating. Just do it. So what if you take some crappy pictures in the meantime. Maybe place a new goal on yourself, a little less stressful, like one great photo a week?

As for obsessing over one photo forever, I have definitely been there and done that with paintings, and murals, too. I just sometimes don't know when to stop. That's when I think of my other favorite quote about art, by Leonardo daVinci: "Art is never finished, only abandoned." So true for me. I don't consider any work I've ever done to be "finished," there's always more I want to do. I just force myself to abandon it, and move on.

I'm sure you will eventually find that sweet spot between working too much and too little! :artpalette:

Thank you so so much for your response! And to the others too :) I am so glad to say that the endotoxin passed and now I am seeing clearly and feeling good again. I just get extreme bouts of un-motivation, or I want to try something new - like I recently decided to make my own masks for photographs, but then I wasn't feeling well and was not inclined to photograph them, which is stupid because I can at least hide behind my panda mask :)

Would love to see your artwork! The image I attached is an old one now (almost a year old). But it is actually one of my fav's on account of the location and the fact that it sums up my feelings from time to time. I guess I get lost in my own thought process.

Thanks again for your sweet response :)
 

bobbybobbob

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Lindsay, what is your wedding rate? Your work is amazing. I love your russia pics. I'm in the mid-atlantic, so an overnight trip from you up north. I have no idea what people charge for these things. $3K?
 

artemis

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Would love to see your artwork!

Well, here is a ceiling mural that I just completed (or abandoned, really!):

simmons ceiling full.jpg


I used a theme of "night and day," with one lady being the "day" angel holding the sun, and the other the "night" one, holding a star. Even now, all I see is the things I'd like to still work on, things that are not done to me. But luckily. the clients love it, and I just have to move on.

Here is a painting on canvas that I recently sold:

marsh sunset sm 1994w.jpg


I'm kind of reluctant to post my website on here -- it would remove all my anonymity, and I know I wouldn't feel nearly as free to talk about my various issues! I'll message you with my website info.
 

Drareg

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Well, here is a ceiling mural that I just completed (or abandoned, really!):

View attachment 2506

I used a theme of "night and day," with one lady being the "day" angel holding the sun, and the other the "night" one, holding a star. Even now, all I see is the things I'd like to still work on, things that are not done to me. But luckily. the clients love it, and I just have to move on.

Here is a painting on canvas that I recently sold:

View attachment 2507

I'm kind of reluctant to post my website on here -- it would remove all my anonymity, and I know I wouldn't feel nearly as free to talk about my various issues! I'll message you with my website info.

There amazing.
 
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lindsay

lindsay

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Well, here is a ceiling mural that I just completed (or abandoned, really!):

simmons-ceiling-full-jpg.2506


I used a theme of "night and day," with one lady being the "day" angel holding the sun, and the other the "night" one, holding a star. Even now, all I see is the things I'd like to still work on, things that are not done to me. But luckily. the clients love it, and I just have to move on.

Here is a painting on canvas that I recently sold:

marsh-sunset-sm-1994w-jpg.2507


I'm kind of reluctant to post my website on here -- it would remove all my anonymity, and I know I wouldn't feel nearly as free to talk about my various issues! I'll message you with my website info.

These are both incredible! You have so much talent!! I love to hear what inspires you to create? I suppose it's different for everyone. I actually felt like taking photos today, but I have to work this afternoon and don't like feeling limited by time because setting up lighting & backdrops can be a pain.

Thank you for sharing your stunning paintings!
 

tyler

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Jul 23, 2015
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@lindsay - your work is incredible. I just checked out your website and I am blown away by not only your technical abilities but the depth and layers within the concepts of your photographs. Do you get commissioned for creative works ever? Or are you mainly focusing on weddings?

I myself am (was) a photographer/filmmaker. Until I became sick and obsessed with health (or the other way around).. I am in an identical position that you described yourself to once be in. Depressed, unmotivated, and totally separate from the passions that once made me who I was.

I was wondering if you could share the community that you became a part of? It sounds like something that could push me out of the rut that I'm in. I would love to check it out and consider joining.

Here is my website with some personal work if you're interested.
HOME
 

artemis

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There amazing.

Thank you, Drareg!

These are both incredible! You have so much talent!! I love to hear what inspires you to create?

Thank you, Lindsay. I don't know what inspires me to create, everything I guess. It's just something I do, something I have to do. It's not really a choice. I have done it since I was a child.

Your work is amazing! Best of luck in your career.
 
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hi lindsay, i just wanted to say i really liked your photograph. it has many aspects to it that are interesting like the outside window, the reflection, the black and white, the general feel of it. there is a lot going on and there is a lot of interpretations which i think is cool. the grunge brick wall touching the smooth white wall, like symbolizing different emotions, plus you are looking down towards the bricks, towards the worse part of the wall, i find kind of ironic because it seems to be called "alone" and that happened to be there too which is cool.

in relation to your topic, i had times where i went into full "business mode" working to build a business online and make money online and i do remember feeling better when i did those things. i also picked up DJing recently and felt very good doing it. it was nice to have hobbies and people seemed more interested in me and wanted to learn more about them which is cool too. i think it gives you more layers to yourself as a person and it helps you relate to people better, so i can see it doing a lot of good things.
 

Makrosky

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lindsay, thanks for sharing this with us!! I think what helped you so much is not the photography itself or any form of art per se, but the other things you said, to sum up :

- Stopping compulsively checking health information on internet.
- Doing something you like and is creative, it doesn't have to be "art". Nobody would call haidut an artist in the classical sense but I'm sure his work creating supplements is equally rewarding.
- Having a purpose for the day, a challenge, something to get up in the morning.
- Creating social relationships with other people.

This is not to say Art doesn't have curative properties by itself, but I think it's not limited to it at all.

I was reading this week a small book on the japanese village (Ogimi) which is regarded as having the most longevity index in the world. The authors give the typical mainstream stuff like daily exercise, antioxidants, etc. and really, the authors don't know a ***t. But they interviewed the centenarians and everything is very anti Peat there : lots of vegetables, no sugar, lots of green tea, small caloric intake, etc. But I think the most important thing, and the inverviewed super centenarians said, is that they have these things :

- A purpose in life. It doesn't matter if it's growing a garden, helping others, whatever. Having a goal.
- A very strong sense of community and solid social relationships with LOTS of friends. Real friends, of course. Helping each other.
- Don't retire. They want to feel useful to their very last day. Keep doing things, not in an obsessive manner but just doing things you like or are helpful to others.
- Smiling a lot. Of course not forced. Trying to smile more when you don't want to won't do anything good. This has to come from a deep sense of being at ease with yourself and the world.
- Do things without stress. Calmness. Do a lot of things but not multitasking, one after the other.
- Get up early, go to bed early.

It's too bad people on this forum tend to think of all these as inferior means to reach good health/metabolism.
 

Drareg

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lindsay, thanks for sharing this with us!! I think what helped you so much is not the photography itself or any form of art per se, but the other things you said, to sum up :

- Stopping compulsively checking health information on internet.
- Doing something you like and is creative, it doesn't have to be "art". Nobody would call haidut an artist in the classical sense but I'm sure his work creating supplements is equally rewarding.
- Having a purpose for the day, a challenge, something to get up in the morning.
- Creating social relationships with other people.

This is not to say Art doesn't have curative properties by itself, but I think it's not limited to it at all.

I was reading this week a small book on the japanese village (Ogimi) which is regarded as having the most longevity index in the world. The authors give the typical mainstream stuff like daily exercise, antioxidants, etc. and really, the authors don't know a ****. But they interviewed the centenarians and everything is very anti Peat there : lots of vegetables, no sugar, lots of green tea, small caloric intake, etc. But I think the most important thing, and the inverviewed super centenarians said, is that they have these things :

- A purpose in life. It doesn't matter if it's growing a garden, helping others, whatever. Having a goal.
- A very strong sense of community and solid social relationships with LOTS of friends. Real friends, of course. Helping each other.
- Don't retire. They want to feel useful to their very last day. Keep doing things, not in an obsessive manner but just doing things you like or are helpful to others.
- Smiling a lot. Of course not forced. Trying to smile more when you don't want to won't do anything good. This has to come from a deep sense of being at ease with yourself and the world.
- Do things without stress. Calmness. Do a lot of things but not multitasking, one after the other.
- Get up early, go to bed early.

It's too bad people on this forum tend to think of all these as inferior means to reach good health/metabolism.



I get what your getting at but I think it's hard for people on this forum to live this way,many would love this lifestyle and realise it will give better health, it's not that easy to drop everything and live that way, I think Peat realises this and his advice reflects that.
Current western countries will not have pensions like the baby boom generation have either, we will be lucky to have anything.
You can't even take land to farm without government permission.
Our salaries are lower and we work more, never has inequality been so high. having kids these days must be more difficult.
The only thing many on this forum can be creative with is survival mode these days or get community and hope from rebuilding a toxic system.

It's also important to take note of the fraud rampant in Japanese longevity studies, the fraud is in the name of claiming welfare/pensions.
Some children who's parent died at 83 kept the body mummified in his bedroom for 30 years while collecting the parents pension, there are many examples of this in Japan.
 
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lindsay

lindsay

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I get what your getting at but I think it's hard for people on this forum to live this way,many would love this lifestyle and realise it will give better health, it's not that easy to drop everything and live that way, I think Peat realises this and his advice reflects that.
Current western countries will not have pensions like the baby boom generation have either, we will be lucky to have anything.
You can't even take land to farm without government permission.
Our salaries are lower and we work more, never has inequality been so high. having kids these days must be more difficult.
The only thing many on this forum can be creative with is survival mode these days or get community and hope from rebuilding a toxic system.

I get what you are saying, because I was there too. But internally, as a person, when you get to a point when you are ready to take an adventurous step, it's necessary to health and happiness, I think. And I had plenty of reason to hide away and be upset - I faced the possibility of ovarian cancer at age 30, lost my fertility after having the massive tumor removed, then discovered Ray Peat and began the healing process. And it got worse before it got better. It took me almost two years and a full appendectomy surgery to realize that caring so much about my health hadn't really gotten me crazy far (though I was feeling somewhat more balanced and I had managed to conquer my eating disorders after dealing with them for half of my adult life), but I'm still paying off hospital bills. The year I took time away from hyper-focusing on my health was really positive and life-changing. I still took my thyroid and progesterone, experienced my frustration when I had digestive troubles, etc. But having something to channel my energy and feelings into was really life-changing. And I began listening to my body more.

That being said, a few years ago, my husband and I bought a dirt cheap property in rural Estonia - a town predominantly Russian speaking and close to the border. We are by no means rich and drive old used vehicles and live in a cheap apartment here in the US. But we go there for a few weeks each summer - another therapeutic time when we live without running water and use a compost toilet, sleeping in a 200 sq. foot "house". I've met good number of neighbors there - people who lost everything during the collapse of the Soviet Union and live on a $225 per month pension. I have nothing to complain about. Things stink here, yes. I pay tons of money for health insurance and deductibles and am still paying off student loans, have had a lot of health problems, but it's my choice what I do. I can sit inside all day when I am home and make myself more depressed, or get out and do something.

Anyhow, I've come out of the depressed Serotonin state I was in this past weekend and am feeling much more optimistic. All of this was to say, if I can do this (you have no idea what a non-optimistic depressed person I was 3 years ago), anyone on here can live how they want. However, I realize we all come from different places and what works for me is different than someone else. But with that said, I will stop rambling ;) Anyhow, thank you for the comments on my thread - I really appreciate them!
 
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