Looking Much Older Months After Having First Child

cyclops

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My wife, age 35, just had our first child. It's been a few months since the birth now, and she looks like she has aged many, many years in this short time. Her hair also looks thin. She has become quite self conscious.

She is also breastfeeding constantly and getting a good night's uninterrupted sleep is hard/impossible. She's always exhausted. I'm thinking that this has very much to do with it. I'm thinking when she stops breastfeeding and gets better sleep she will look start to look a bit younger again. I am wondering if anyone has any similar experience? Is this quite normal? Could it have to do with hormones as well? Are any supplements highly recommended at this time?
 

schultz

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Stress hormones are probably a big factor. Did she get stretch marks? When she wakes up to feed she could have something to eat quickly. Waking up in the middle of the night already sounds hard, but she's making food with her body at the same time. That's gotta be stressful! My wife co-slept with both of our children. When the baby cried she would just turn over, whip out a breast and go back to sleep, instead of having to physically get up and walk to a different room and all that junk.

Ice cream before bed, for my wife and older child, has been a huge help in my opinion.

Progesterone tends to drop off after the pregnancy and estrogen can become dominant. Thinning hair is a sign of low progesterone and/or thyroid issues I believe... It is not abnormal for women to have thyroid issues after pregnancy. I would consider getting her thyroid tested, or if you're comfortable with it you could start supplementing and slowly titrate up.

Nutrition needs to maximized. Beef liver would be helpful. Eggs, milk, etc. Anything nutrient dense.
 
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cyclops

cyclops

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Thank you. No stretch marks. She actually co-sleeps and just whips out a breast too, but she still has to wake up often to do that. She is taking progesterone, but maybe not enough... a few drops of Haidut's product. How much do you think is good? I will consider talking to her about thyroid.
 

tankasnowgod

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I think the biggest issue is the run on calcium stores. First, she had to build a tiny human's skeleton, and now she still has to breastfeed. She (along with all new mothers) probably has really high PTH and prolactin. Hell, I even the name prolactin implies it's pro-lactation.

I think she'd probably start looking and feeling a lot better if she really upped her dairy intake, and calcium in general. The other Calcium cofactors (like Vitamin D, K2, Magnesium, thyroid and so forth) are also important, and I think milk helps with all those.

I've seen testimonials like this for raw milk in the ancestral health community- Raw Milk Solves Low Milk Supply for Nursing Mom

Maybe a good quality raw milk is superior, but I don't think the raw part is all that necessary. A quart a day of any decent milk every day (or more) would probably do her well.
 

lvysaur

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What color are her eyes?

I ask because post-partum anxiety is more common in dark eyed than in blue eyed women.
 
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Elysium

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She just had a baby, as you say gets no sleep and is always exhausted, and you're asking strangers whether she'll be pretty and young again. Poor woman, she clearly hit the jackpot marrying you.

Instead of talking to her about god damn thyroid, how about stepping in and letting her get some uninterrupted sleep?

And as for being self-conscious? That is highly unusual for a woman who just had a child, as their priorities are typicaly elsewhere. Unless they have an ***hole husband who gives them a reason to be self-conscious. Not saying that's you, obviously.
 
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schultz

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She just had a baby, as you say gets no sleep and is always exhausted, and you're asking strangers whether she'll be pretty and young again. Poor woman, she clearly hit the jackpot marrying you.

I think he's worried about her health, at least that's how I took it.
 

Tarmander

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Very common if they are breast feeding throughout the night. Breastfeeding does take a lot of energy, especially if the woman is worried about losing baby weight and not eating a bunch. I second the ice cream recommendation.

@Elysium lol white knight much?
 

tara

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I agree with those above stressing her need for generous nutrition, including calcium. And I've seen recommendations for around 3500 calories for that first year - she's got to not only recover herself, but is still eating for the rapidly growing young one and working hard too.

If she is having to wake up often, she may need to get bed earlier/sleep in longer/get naps in the day when baby sleeps to keep up with sleep needs. I did the cosleeping, got woken up often, and if I was (rarely) allowed to keep sleeping till 9 am it was OK.

Progesterone is high in pregnancy and I think it tends to drop quite fast post partum. Common for progesterone to be high in pregnancy and then to drop down post partum.

It can be high stress for her, what with life completely changing, and the high demands of the job. How you treat her, and what other support she has around her, makes a huge difference to her stress levels. If you've read a bit of Peat, you'll have seen him refer to excess stress as contributing to the aging process.
What support you get probably makes a difference to your stress levels, and how well you can contribute to making it go well for her and baby too.
Make sure you get some time together without the baby to enjoy each other's company - important for long term sustainability.
 
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cyclops

cyclops

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Thank you all so much for the helpful advice. Does anyone have any recommendations on how many drops of Haidut's "Progestene" Progesterone, she should be taking?
 

schultz

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Thank you all so much for the helpful advice. Does anyone have any recommendations on how many drops of Haidut's "Progestene" Progesterone, she should be taking?

I would start with 10 drops per day. I believe it is a 1mg per drop product?
 
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cyclops

cyclops

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It seems 12 drops = 20 mg so each drop contains approximately .6 mg. But it is dissolved in dmso, so does that mean I have to multiply the dose by 10? So 1 drop is really like 6 mg instead of .6 mg?
 
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mangoes

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It seems 12 drops = 20 mg so each drop contains approximately .6 mg. But it is dissolved in dmso, so does that mean I have to multiply the dose by 10? So 1 drop is really like 6 mg instead of .6 mg?

If she's breastfeeding are there any risks of using DMSO? I dunno but the stuff doesn't sit well with me and a number of others on the forum. Something to think about
 
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cyclops

cyclops

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So confused about this DMSO stuff; don't really know what it is or why it may be bad....but now that you mention it I am concerned. Don't want to give her anything bad.

Anyone else think DMSO is especially bad when breastfeeding?
 

mangoes

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I don't know if it's especially bad when breastfeeding, honestly I don't know. It's just not good for me and might not be for her either (although might be? I think there are potential beneficial effects too) so figured I'd mention it. And I just thought DMSO might pass into the breast milk so baby might end up drinking some?
 

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