Learned Helplessness In The Solar Plexus

[cyclops]

Sometimes when I feel helpless and weak, I seem to feel this fear in my solar plexus area. Can anyone relate? It is like a tightening in this area. How do I heal this?

 

[Luann]

don't know. the stomach and areas around it are very tender areas, its not surprising they sense your discomfort. you're probably going to get replies that talk about better digestion and metabolic rate,if i would guess.

 

[Regina]

I wish I could add something intelligent. Only just my experience.
I do remember I used to be very sensitive in solar plexus. I never even knew about the solar plexus and the SP is often talked about in martial arts.
I thought it was an extremely sensitive spot when I first started aikido as a very very scared and shy, learned helpless person.
At some point, the sensitivity there went away completely. I can pound on it or tap all around it with zero sensitivity. I've been poked with a jo (wooden stick) pretty hard and taken many jabs to it in class.
Nothing. I don't know if Peat would support the idea, but I think tapping on it with your fist 100 times a day for a couple of weeks would help.

 

[tara]

Maybe find a couple of friends and go to the most benign, funniest comedy you can find, and follow it up with practicing making each other crack up? Some vigorous sustained laughing might help strengthen and relax that area. :)

 

[Hugh Johnson]

Stand up, or sit up. Focus on the feeling, bring it up. Note the intensity. Once you feel it there, take it out. You hold the feeling in once hand and use the other hand to make sure you get all of it. This may take up to 20 minutes.

Once you have that feeling in your hand, note the colour it has and which direction it circles. If you don't know, pretend, and then pretend you are not pretending. Now, turn it around, so it moves to the opposite direction, and use your hands to speed it up. Keep moving the feeling as fast as you can, doubling the speed with you mind until it changes colour all the way. Note the new colour.

Once it is all changed, put it back in and notice the change. Give it a few moments. Note the feeling. If you did this right it should be all gone, replaced with something positive. Report back.

 

[Herbie]

This pose opens up the solar plexus and allows energy/electricity/blood to flow through the area. Its opposite to the slouching that closes off that area. Could practice this for 10 minutes and feel better. Im not a yoga person, just have studied biomechanics a bit.

If you access to a swiss ball/exercise ball it can be done laying on the ball which is easier.

 

[Wagner83]

Pay attention to your breathing.

 

[J1000]

Sometimes when I feel helpless and weak, I seem to feel this fear in my solar plexus area. Can anyone relate? It is like a tightening in this area. How do I heal this?

Different stories/memories affect different areas of the body. Solar plexus has to do with things relating to will-power. Don't know if you ever did anything like meditation or so but try and feel into the area, has the feeling any shape, edges, associated color, etc, etc... Things affecting the body like this are usually unresolved stuff which are still in the unconscious, and giving space for it to arise in conscious experience can make it resolve.

just my 2c,

since I started meditation etc I had these type of things in different areas, its not placebo, its psychological related IME. The more attune you become the more clearly do you feel the connection with thought-patterns or belief systems.

 

[Integra]

I think you got some great advice how to physically stimulate the solar plexus, usually by loosening/moving/stretching the diaphragm (either by laughter like @tara suggested, or literally get smacked on it with a stick like @Regina, who literally got it beaten out of her haha). And various yoga poses that stretch that area (like the bridge) can also be of help.

But all of those only handle the mechanics of the sensation. I like to believe that the feeling that’s bugging you is a meaningful psychological signal, and that there is something important for you in your life that you need to realize, accept, remove yourself from, or fight against.

That sinking feeling in your stomach comes with the terror of considering the worst case scenario—the various whatifs specific to your life situation. If it only crops up related to a certain aspect (time, person, place, activity) of your life, you have an idea where the source of fear you need to come to terms with is.

But, as it has been the case for me at one point in my life, if the feeling comes up somewhat randomly and very frequently, even in relation to the most mundane tasks like doing the dishes, mowing the lawn, getting groceries, etc., then your dragon is sitting in a deep cave somewhere, and you can’t really access it, but you definitely feel its stings and it’s confusing.

I can suggest you try two things: the first one is a short-term solution when there's that thing you're facing and your stomach hits the floor; and the second one is what you can do during a pocket of your free time, when enough is enough and you just won't let this stop you.

1. Drop the narrative.
Whatever it is that you immediately need to do, can you describe it in the most neutral, objective language to an imaginary third person? If you do that, and realize that performing this objective thing is your job (so to speak), then you can just discard all the physical sensations and troubling thoughts that accompany it, because they are unimportant to you right now. The thing that needs to be done is this, and you will do it.

2. Plunge yourself into the worst case scenario and make it ok.
This is difficult. This may not work the first time you do it. It is emotionally draining. But if you can voluntarily experience the worst case scenario in your mind, and realize that you are not a bad person even if that happened, and that even if the whole world turns against you, you’ll still fight, you still deserve to be happy, you will still be your own best friend, there is tremendous power in having this realization. Then the scary scenario (perhaps the one in which you are unbearably weak, embarrassed, humiliated, defeated—pick your poison) doesn’t vanish, it’s still there as one possibility of what might happen, but it no longer has a grip on you. It remains possible, but it is simply no longer an issue. You don’t need to ignore, you don’t need to “affirm” it, it’s just there as something that might happen, but you’re gonna do what you’re being called to do despite all of that.

 

[Integra]

I just realized what all of the advice in the thread may have in common.
They temporarily push you out of the position of the sufferer.

1. Shifting perspective: getting a cosmic sense of humor

When you laugh (about anything), you cannot at the same time be the one who's suffering. Whenever you laugh, you've gone a bit "up" to a perspective from which there's a cosmic sense of humor--why, after all, did this happen to that, and why exactly is that funny? The other day a bird pooped on my hand on my way to an important meeting. I was having some really lofty and heavy thoughts when it happened. I didn't even notice it, so I smeared the poop all over my purse, blazer, shirt... All the while I was thinking how hard everything is, and how much good I'll do. So heavy. So saintly.

Then I noticed I was covered in birdsheit.

2. Shifting perspective: engaging the fires of volition over higher goals, something you care for more than the state you're in right now

When you stand in front of a stick, and yell at it, "Hit me! Not once, but hit me a hundred times!" The fear no longer can be there. You decided to feel the pain, and that determination makes the fear irrelevant. You chose a higher goal (to be strong, or good in aikido) over the immediate goal and its risks (get hit by a stick, feel pain). The person who selected the higher goal cannot be the same person who's afraid. They cancel each other out. The first one is stronger because it's volitional, while the other one is reactive and doesn't even wanna exist. Being in a state of learned helplessness is painful.

3. Shifting perspective: merging with the painful feelings in role-play

And if you do the yoga exercises in a certain kind of state mind, as you focus on the feeling in your solar plexus, you completely merge with the pain. You are in fact your pain as long as there is nothing you're thinking about except for that feeling as you perform a certain movement. You literally roleplay as your pain, like ancient people who put on masks and acted as demons who carried disease and so on... As you act it out, you might resolve it. I think you'd get the same effect if you danced to a song whose lyrics impact you/remind you of that thing that's causing you pain, and then dancing as if you're the perpetrator (the bad guy, the bad set of circumstances, whatever that means).

4. Shifting perpsective: imaginative externalization

If you're the type, like someone already suggested, you can imagine colors, shapes, whatever you need to give your feeling a physical existence, and then do something with it in a sophisticated game of play-pretend. For me, this is more useful as an analytic tool to understand the feeling, because if you can't analyze it, you will be able to discover it because you can certainly spontaneously imagine it. That thing that crops up in the process and you don't understand is the symbol for your pain.

 

[tara]

I like to believe that the feeling that’s bugging you is a meaningful psychological signal, and that there is something important for you in your life that you need to realize, accept, remove yourself from, or fight against.

I think of laughing as both physical and a way to release emotions involved in fear and tension.

 

[Integra]

You're right, I corrected myself in the second post! I actually think they're all great tools for dealing with emotions.

 

[Regina]

Maybe find a couple of friends and go to the most benign, funniest comedy you can find, and follow it up with practicing making each other crack up? Some vigorous sustained laughing might help strengthen and relax that area. :)

Yes. This to!:)

 

[Regina]

I think you got some great advice how to physically stimulate the solar plexus, usually by loosening/moving/stretching the diaphragm (either by laughter like @tara suggested, or literally get smacked on it with a stick like @Regina, who literally got it beaten out of her haha). And various yoga poses that stretch that area (like the bridge) can also be of help.

But all of those only handle the mechanics of the sensation. I like to believe that the feeling that’s bugging you is a meaningful psychological signal, and that there is something important for you in your life that you need to realize, accept, remove yourself from, or fight against.

That sinking feeling in your stomach comes with the terror of considering the worst case scenario—the various whatifs specific to your life situation. If it only crops up related to a certain aspect (time, person, place, activity) of your life, you have an idea where the source of fear you need to come to terms with is.

But, as it has been the case for me at one point in my life, if the feeling comes up somewhat randomly and very frequently, even in relation to the most mundane tasks like doing the dishes, mowing the lawn, getting groceries, etc., then your dragon is sitting in a deep cave somewhere, and you can’t really access it, but you definitely feel its stings and it’s confusing.

I can suggest you try two things: the first one is a short-term solution when there's that thing you're facing and your stomach hits the floor; and the second one is what you can do during a pocket of your free time, when enough is enough and you just won't let this stop you.

1. Drop the narrative.
Whatever it is that you immediately need to do, can you describe it in the most neutral, objective language to an imaginary third person? If you do that, and realize that performing this objective thing is your job (so to speak), then you can just discard all the physical sensations and troubling thoughts that accompany it, because they are unimportant to you right now. The thing that needs to be done is this, and you will do it.

2. Plunge yourself into the worst case scenario and make it ok.
This is difficult. This may not work the first time you do it. It is emotionally draining. But if you can voluntarily experience the worst case scenario in your mind, and realize that you are not a bad person even if that happened, and that even if the whole world turns against you, you’ll still fight, you still deserve to be happy, you will still be your own best friend, there is tremendous power in having this realization. Then the scary scenario (perhaps the one in which you are unbearably weak, embarrassed, humiliated, defeated—pick your poison) doesn’t vanish, it’s still there as one possibility of what might happen, but it no longer has a grip on you. It remains possible, but it is simply no longer an issue. You don’t need to ignore, you don’t need to “affirm” it, it’s just there as something that might happen, but you’re gonna do what you’re being called to do despite all of that.

"like @Regina, who literally got it beaten out of her. ' It's true. Whatever was there (and it was huge) has released. It's just gone. I would go as far as to say my solar plexus area is entirely absent of tenderness.
This particular kata that starts at 3:30 in the clip, is what gets you nailed in the solar plexus.

 

[Ashoka]

There's some really interesting advice here. I had this exact problem for a while. Just standing up would cause my stomach to grip together, as if it was trying to balance or hold my entire body up.
Anyway, I believe multiple things can help, regardless exactly what's going on. Learning to breathe gently from the abdomen can help. Actually, learning to properly exhale and purposefully contract that area may be beneficial (a yoga teacher suggested that part to me). In my case I think that area, maybe through fear and anxiety or possibly even infections, became locked in a pattern in which it was continually contracting (the tightening in the area) but not fully contracted and releasing - that's my somewhat non-scientific but rather personal understanding. There's a book by Thomas Hanna called Somatics that names this type of process Sensory Motor Amnesia and claims this type of pattern may be caused by trauma and what he calls the "red light reflex".
But in short, I think you need to strengthen that area and particularly focus on the depth and naturalness of your abdominal breathing. In my case it was something I had to get a feel for it, even with metaphorical imagery (like imagining I was gently inflating a balloon) and it took me some time to figure out and improve on.

Also, anything that opens up the chest, like what BenjaminBullock posted, would probably help. They call these chest openers or heart openers.

 

[Djukami]

Sometimes when I feel helpless and weak, I seem to feel this fear in my solar plexus area. Can anyone relate? It is like a tightening in this area. How do I heal this?

Wait, I think I have this also, but I didn't know that term. I must say I am not an expert on that matter.
But can you tell me an example how it happens to you?
In my case, for instance, when I see a person that has some strange, scary look (I really hate this, because consciously I know that I am clearly judging that person by its appearance, but my body gets really scared anyway when it sees one), I immediately feel some tightening on that area.
I always felt this since I was a kid, but after being robbed few months ago, this tightening became even more intense of course. Like a PTSD symptom, I would guess.
Another example is when I see a person that I don't want to see or talk. Or when I saw my ex girlfriend long time ago.
In my worst days, sometimes even a little noise can trigger this tightening. Even when I am thinking about nothing in particular but if, for some reason, a scary thought crosses by, it immediately triggers also. Some meditation, being conscious and aware of my thoughts really helps, of course. Being in the present moment I would say.
It feels like I am going to have a panic attack any time soon, but it never gets to the point to really happen (I had some in the past and it usually starts by this tightening first).
This tightening is also usually accompanied with the inability to be able look into the eyes of another person. Don't know if that happens to you too.

don't know. the stomach and areas around it are very tender areas, its not surprising they sense your discomfort. you're probably going to get replies that talk about better digestion and metabolic rate,if i would guess.

It seems you guessed it wrong xD. There are some good advices here already that I will try, but I really see a connection in what you're saying also. For example, when my digestion isn't that great, I notice how my eyebrows just change their stances: they are always tense and I have this serious look. Actually, my mood on those days is just awful. I get easily irritated by everything.

After reading a lot from Selfhackedcom and Joe's story, I really tried to limit my foods that I think they cause some inflammation. To my surprise, I got some results. When I did that, I was finally able to see some weird looking guy, do not feel afraid of him nor having this tightening sensation. Actually, I could look into his eyes without any problem. It was also the first time I was able to maintain good eye contact in a conversation. It felt so liberating.
The lesson here is: there is really some truth behind gut brain axis.
And guess what? I was pooping two times a day when I was doing that experience. My 'normal' state is being constipated.
Joe's protocol really works, but I can't maintain it long term... It's really hard, because I think am exactly like him: I react to every single food possible. However, he has money and, more important, knowledge. I just don't...

**NOTE**: I have to add this note to be completely honest in what I am saying.
I am doing a chelation therapy, infrared sauna and ozonotherapy for some months. Basically, since I am still not independent, 'failed' in all my life and, hence, I have no credibility, everything I say it's just non sense. The moment I start talking to my parents or, worst, to a physician about my symptoms the classic argument appears "You know that's all in your head, don't you?". I am a classic learned helpless example. So my parents can easily afford doing these therapies, but if I want to do my things, it wouldn't be so easy. But I understand them: they want to help me and I appreciate that.
So, the reason I am adding this note is because, who knows, perhaps the therapies are really working. Even though I was every single day impatient for not seeing any results. That's why I did the experience I've mentioned during one full week. I felt like I have to do something and I just can't wait one more month feeling always shitty.
I am trying now to follow what I was doing before, being learned helpless and follow the recommendations given to me, to see if I am able to get back to square zero and to finally confirm if the therapies are actually working or not. I don't think so, but who knows. Perhaps they really take some time until it's start working. If there will be a point that I have to admit that I was all wrong about these therapies, it will just have to admit it. After all, it would mean that I was feeling better.

 

[Djukami]

The advices here are really interesting. Whether from a psychological point of view, metabolism, meditation, all have some interconnection.

@Regina
What do you mean by an extremely sensitive spot? To me, if a person touches this area, it immediately contracts. I would say it tickles me, but the contraction indeed exists and it's very sensitive.

But all of those only handle the mechanics of the sensation. I like to believe that the feeling that’s bugging you is a meaningful psychological signal, and that there is something important for you in your life that you need to realize, accept, remove yourself from, or fight against.
But, as it has been the case for me at one point in my life, if the feeling comes up somewhat randomly and very frequently, even in relation to the most mundane tasks like doing the dishes, mowing the lawn, getting groceries, etc., then your dragon is sitting in a deep cave somewhere, and you can’t really access it, but you definitely feel its stings and it’s confusing.

Yes, this really happens to me. When I am at worst, indeed, even brushing my teeth tightens this area.

I want to ask this first: is it possible to carry my mother's pain with me, so to speak? My mother also suffers from this and when I hear her telling her story, it is very easy to understand it was because of my grandfather that she has this tightening. My grandfather was like a 'sergeant' in her house. The moment he arrived home, everyone would change their mood and position.

However, to be honest, unfortunately, me and my brother also suffered the same whether we carry it from my mum or not.
Our father is actually like my grandfather: a sergeant too. We did the same as my mum: change immediately our mood and personality when he was present. He wasn't also a very present father. Everything we did was always bad and wrong. Having the constant sensation like if someone was watching us all the time (and this was true, he would be watching us all the time. Even pooping asking what were we doing, geez, lol). Perhaps it is what this tightening is all about: feeling like we have a gun pointed in our heads all the time.
I remember when I was a kid that the best moment of the day was when my dad left to work (I loved to play videogames and he hate it) and the worst moment was when he came back home (let's change videogames to study books to seem that I am studying). I remember that I would wait in bed until he went away to get up. It's fascinating sad that I somehow still do this even today with 26 years old (I mean, I can get up first than him now. But there is always this sensation that something is wrong). I have more tools with me now, but his presence still bothers me. For instance, most of things I believe (like blue blocking glasses, eating X types of food, meditation, etc), I immediately stop following them because it seems like he is there just to mock me in what I am doing. He mocks at me when I use the blue blocking glasses; he mocks when I say that eating organic or grass fed is better; etc. Like, I can't really be what I truly am.
It seems this tightening is a continuous behavior that we did for such a long time in childhood till the point we become 'like this' as our normal state of being: scared learned helpless.

And last question: my belly is always tense. I remember someone talking about this too. Does anyone knows what that can possible mean? Of course, in terms of body composition, someone would say that is very good to my abs. But, again, it feels like I carry on some extra heavy and can't liberate it.

 

[Regina]

The advices here are really interesting. Whether from a psychological point of view, metabolism, meditation, all have some interconnection.

@Regina
What do you mean by an extremely sensitive spot? To me, if a person touches this area, it immediately contracts. I would say it tickles me, but the contraction indeed exists and it's very sensitive.


Yes, this really happens to me. When I am at worst, indeed, even brushing my teeth tightens this area.

I want to ask this first: is it possible to carry my mother's pain with me, so to speak? My mother also suffers from this and when I hear her telling her story, it is very easy to understand it was because of my grandfather that she has this tightening. My grandfather was like a 'sergeant' in her house. The moment he arrived home, everyone would change their mood and position.

However, to be honest, unfortunately, me and my brother also suffered the same whether we carry it from my mum or not.
Our father is actually like my grandfather: a sergeant too. We did the same as my mum did with my grandfather: change immediately our mood and personality when he was present. He wasn't also a very present father. Everything we did was always bad and wrong. Having the constant sensation like if someone was watching us all the time (and this was true, he would be watching us all the time. Even pooping asking what were we doing, geez, lol). Perhaps it is what this tightening is all about: feeling like we have a gun pointed in our heads all the time.
I remember when I was a kid that the best moment of the day was when my dad left to work (I loved to play videogames and he hate it) and the worst moment was when he came back home (let's change videogames to study books to seem that I am studying). I remember that I would wait in bed until he went away to get up. It's fascinating sad that I somehow still do this even today with 26 years old (I mean, I can get up first than him now. But there is always this sensation that something is wrong). I have more tools with me now, but his presence still bothers me. For instance, most of things I believe (like blue blocking glasses, eating X types of food, meditation, etc), I immediately stop following them because it seems like he is there just to mock me in what I am doing. He mocks at me when I use the blue blocking glasses; he mocks when I say that eating organic or grass fed is better; etc. Like, I can't really be what I truly am.
It seems this tightening is a continuous behavior that we did for such a long time in childhood till the point we become 'like this' as our normal state of being: scared learned helpless.

At last question: my belly is always tense. Does anyone knows what that can possible mean? Of course, in terms of body composition, someone would say that is very good to my abs. But, again, it feels like we are carry on some extra heavy with us.

My whole chest used to be caved in and I hate even looking at childhood pictures of me. I was skinny and folded in on myself. It was not until I started aikido that I became aware of anything I could do about it. My first teacher talked about the "solar plexus" -- which I'd never heard of. When he said it, I felt around for mine and "Youch!!" It hurt to touch that area. I tried tapping on it and it felt just horrible, tender, sore, nasty pain. One of the zen monks at the school does deep bodywork. He worked on the area and would say, "let me sink in here." We'd done a lot of breathe work, meditation and aikido together. So I was comfortable figuring out how to let areas go and let him sink in. He would reach up under my ribs and sink his fingers completely in. It got better and better each time. I just remember that I would pour tears when he touched that area. Not of pain. He was releasing something. This area on me is like bulletproof now.
But our main teacher is the King of the forest when it comes to Zen and martial arts. He really was amazing at being able to rapidly cut through anybody's delusions. He could see it and his teaching is very direct and physical. He could zap ***t out of a person in an instance. My body composition is completely different than the body I grew up with. The frame looks completely different and how the muscle lay.
As far as other people, well, you must live your life "all in one breath" as they say in zen. One arrowhead cannot hit two targets.

 

[cyclops]

Stand up, or sit up. Focus on the feeling, bring it up. Note the intensity. Once you feel it there, take it out. You hold the feeling in once hand and use the other hand to make sure you get all of it. This may take up to 20 minutes.

Once you have that feeling in your hand, note the colour it has and which direction it circles. If you don't know, pretend, and then pretend you are not pretending. Now, turn it around, so it moves to the opposite direction, and use your hands to speed it up. Keep moving the feeling as fast as you can, doubling the speed with you mind until it changes colour all the way. Note the new colour.

Once it is all changed, put it back in and notice the change. Give it a few moments. Note the feeling. If you did this right it should be all gone, replaced with something positive. Report back.

Tried this. Didn't seem to work.

 

[DMF]

You've probably spent much of your life - from childhood onward, sucking in your belly while sticking out your chest as a defensive mechanism without realizing it. This all thwarted your body's natural development - and predictably, your breathing patterns.
Start by starting from the belly - stick it OUT while inhaling, even if it looks and feels funny. and don't worry about your chest getting enough air - it will. Learned helplessness manifests in "stuck" breathing.
Breathing is deeply ingrained in one's personality but can be first un-learned the re-learned if willing.