Jennifer's Cellular Regeneration Log

[Jennifer]

Hi @Jennifer! I’ve really enjoyed this thread and learned a lot from it—thank you for your explanatory posts and writing style!

I’ve recently been getting into honeydew and can totally tell the difference in effect between a very ripe one and an unripe one—the latter will wreck me, while the former will give me my life back.

I keep having spikes of high adrenaline throughout the day, often waking up in a very anxious and nervous state. Throughout the day I will have a high heart rate and low temperature. I recall in another thread that you mentioned having high adrenaline in the past. What worked in helping you resolve the high adrenaline symptoms?

Edit: I just saw your response to jet9 back in June, where you mention it happened to you because of gut irritation, or because of going too long without sugar, or having too much sugar at once. I will give these a shot :)

Oh good, I’m glad! It’s my pleasure! :)

For sure! Ripe fruit and unripe fruit are worlds apart in my experience, too.

Yep, from gut irritation but mostly from low thyroid function — NDT stopped the daily adrenaline induced convulsions and syncope episodes — and hypoglycemia triggered by too much protein without enough carbs. I found that milk and gelatin didn’t trigger my hypoglycemia but more than a couple ounces of meat in a sitting did, and that I need a carb to protein ratio of roughly 4:1 to prevent it, as well as salt — I tended to not use much at all.

Have you tried having some protein with your juice and are you getting enough salt? Prior to tolerating milk, I found that I did best accompanying the juice with a couple ounces of salted meat (scallops and crab) or gelatin — I kept a batch of homemade gummies (with salt added to the recipe) in the fridge or added hydrolysate to the juice. The only way I can think to explain it is fruit improves my mood/mental state, protein grounds me and salt calms my nerves.

 

[Jennifer]

Nice then, I like it!
You had a friend... I am certain that this guy was VOS. You still has contact with him?? I hope so.

DHEA is androgenic, for women its as anabolic as Testosterone. The balance is what matters. I read a quote from Haidut saying something like: "DHEA is essential to libido and to the sexual function of women, it even helps lubricate the vagina."

About B1: I would start at the lower dosages to know how my body reacts and slowly up the dose. Thiamine Is A Carbonic Anhydrase Inhibitor As Effective As Acetazolamide
"The highest concentration of thiamine is required to inhibit hCA I and it is 380nM/L. This figure from a human study on the pharmacokinetics of thiamine shows that this concentration is achievable using a 1,500mg dose."

About niacinamide, its important that it is niacinamide not niacin, based on 2 studies, a dosage of 6 to 8mg/ kg seems to be the best!
Low-dose (but Not High) Niacinamide Reverses Reproductive Decline In Old Females
"The HED of the effective regimen was 6mg/kg daily and duration of treatment was 4 weeks. That means a daily dosage of 250mg-500mg for a month should be able to replicate the design (and hopefully findings) of the study for most humans."

Niacinamide Retards/Reverses Aging And Physiological Decline

Yep, VoS. No, unfortunately, we aren’t still in contact.

Oh, okay. Everything is good in that department so I’m thinking I probably shouldn’t mess with DHEA then. I’ll read through the threads you linked to tonight. Thanks for all the info! I really appreciate the help, Matheus! :)

 

[MatheusPN]

Yep, VoS. No, unfortunately, we aren’t still in contact.

Oh, okay. Everything is good in that department so I’m thinking I probably shouldn’t mess with DHEA then. I’ll read through the threads you linked to tonight. Thanks for all the info! I really appreciate the help, Matheus! :)

I put that quote for illustrating how its important for women. Like prog, its very important for men, even Ray uses it.

The pleasure is all mine

 

[Jennifer]

I put that quote for illustrating how its important for women. Like prog, its very important for men, even Ray uses it.

The pleasure is all mine

Gotcha. :)

 

[Vileplume]

Hello again @Jennifer! I hope you’ve been great. I’ve seen in several of your posts that you’ve mentioned healing your adrenals, and I saw that you posted a list of helpful herbs including eleuthero, camu camu, echinacea, and passionflower.

My main question is, what were the biggest factors that allowed you to heal your adrenals? Did you do anything in addition to the herbs? Do you think taking a break from thyroid was necessary to allow your adrenals to heal?

Thanks.

 

[Jennifer]

Hi @Vileplume! Thanks! I hope you have as well. :)

The herbs were in combination with the fruitarian diet and kept my adrenals and thyroid stable during a time when I was dealing with a lot of stress caring for ailing loved ones, and NDT stopped the adrenaline attacks and syncope episodes initially so it definitely helped take the burden off my adrenals, giving them a chance to relax, but I’d say the biggest factors that helped were:

1. Going fruitarian. Prior to this, I had been living with extreme pain for years since my spine collapsed and because I don’t tolerate medication—it makes me vomit so I would have risked injuring my weak, interlocking ribs (due to the osteo and resulting kyphosis)—I had to live with the pain and that in itself was a huge stress. I couldn’t even lift my arms up without my ribs snapping together and re-tearing the cartilage in my chest. The pain vanished within days of going all fruit. It also stopped the hypoglycemic episodes I experienced since birth. I’ve since learned which proteins and how much of them I can have without triggering the pain and hypoglycemia.

2. Refeeding. By refeeding, I don’t mean what is often promoted around here and by health bloggers/vloggers. There weren’t any minimum calorie targets to hit. For me, it was about frequent feedings of specific foods to keep stress hormones down and my adrenals calm. I used foods I enjoy, that digested well, didn’t irritate my intestines, and kept my sugars stable. Each morning I made up 4 liters of fresh pressed juice, or Thai coconut water, with collagen and salt added and sipped on it throughout the day. I also made up sweet and salty gummies in bulk so that I’d have some I could just grab from the fridge or keep with me if I was away from home.

3. Relaxing. Finding ways to relax my body and highly active mind was essential. The main things were napping whenever possible and meditating. Music and dance are my main forms of meditation, but even long walks with my dogs, swimming, massages, warm baths with magnesium salt and calming oils like chamomile and vanilla or something as simple as building with Legos or coloring, helped quiet my mind and relax my adrenals. When I was having the daily attacks last winter, my best friend would take me out at night to get cold air and we’d drive around looking at light shows, you know, the ones where you turn your radio dial to a specific station and the music syncs up with the lights? They’d practically have me in a trance. lol

4. Releasing. Expressing my displeasure and pain wasn’t a strength of mine so I had, and still have, some stored up energy of past trauma, guilt, shame, fear, heartbreak, disappointment and frustration, that needs releasing, as well as disempowering beliefs and dysfunctional habits. There are many constructive ways to do it, but a good cry in the shower, jumping on a trampoline/rebounding or dancing in my bedroom like a maniac—think Jennifer Beals in Flashdance kind of maniac—until I have completely exhausted myself, works best for me. The last two may seem counterproductive given I’m trying to overcome thyroid and adrenal issues, but much of that is the result of suppressing my voice and emotional junk robbing me energetically.

I’m sorry if that was too simplistic and not at all helpful. I’ve tried so many things in the past in an attempt to heal but I seem to respond best to keeping things uncomplicated and in most aspects, enjoyable. I know many people have found the following helpful but most isolated supplements/drugs, consuming foods I hate because they’re supposedly healthy or avoiding foods I enjoy because they’re supposedly unhealthy, and expending tons of energy on special breath work techniques, nervous system retraining therapies etc., just stressed me and my body out more.

 

[Uselis]

Hey Mis,

I remember a forum member Jennifer went back and forth with other member Vision of Strength here and on another forum. Were that you? Apologies that I am not asking something specific about your thread but I am curious how is he doing. Over the years I've noticed tendency for forum members to crack Peat's work and then they would take off (hopefully to promised land ha ha). Also apologies if I am confusing your name with somebody else ☺

 

[Jennifer]

Hi @Uselis! No worries! Yes, that was me. The last time he and I were in communication was on the other forum close to 4 years ago. I emailed him but never received a response so I don’t know how he’s doing, unfortunately. Sorry!

 

[Vileplume]

Hi @Vileplume! Thanks! I hope you have as well. :)

The herbs were in combination with the fruitarian diet and kept my adrenals and thyroid stable during a time when I was dealing with a lot of stress caring for ailing loved ones, and NDT stopped the adrenaline attacks and syncope episodes initially so it definitely helped take the burden off my adrenals, giving them a chance to relax, but I’d say the biggest factors that helped were:

1. Going fruitarian. Prior to this, I had been living with extreme pain for years since my spine collapsed and because I don’t tolerate medication—it makes me vomit so I would have risked injuring my weak, interlocking ribs (due to the osteo and resulting kyphosis)—I had to live with the pain and that in itself was a huge stress. I couldn’t even lift my arms up without my ribs snapping together and re-tearing the cartilage in my chest. The pain vanished within days of going all fruit. It also stopped the hypoglycemic episodes I experienced since birth. I’ve since learned which proteins and how much of them I can have without triggering the pain and hypoglycemia.

2. Refeeding. By refeeding, I don’t mean what is often promoted around here and by health bloggers/vloggers. There weren’t any minimum calorie targets to hit. For me, it was about frequent feedings of specific foods to keep stress hormones down and my adrenals calm. I used foods I enjoy, that digested well, didn’t irritate my intestines, and kept my sugars stable. Each morning I made up 4 liters of fresh pressed juice, or Thai coconut water, with collagen and salt added and sipped on it throughout the day. I also made up sweet and salty gummies in bulk so that I’d have some I could just grab from the fridge or keep with me if I was away from home.

3. Relaxing. Finding ways to relax my body and highly active mind was essential. The main things were napping whenever possible and meditating. Music and dance are my main forms of meditation, but even long walks with my dogs, swimming, massages, warm baths with magnesium salt and calming oils like chamomile and vanilla or something as simple as building with Legos or coloring, helped quiet my mind and relax my adrenals. When I was having the daily attacks last winter, my best friend would take me out at night to get cold air and we’d drive around looking at light shows, you know, the ones where you turn your radio dial to a specific station and the music syncs up with the lights? They’d practically have me in a trance. lol

4. Releasing. Expressing my displeasure and pain wasn’t a strength of mine so I had, and still have, some stored up energy of past trauma, guilt, shame, fear, heartbreak, disappointment and frustration, that needs releasing, as well as disempowering beliefs and dysfunctional habits. There are many constructive ways to do it, but a good cry in the shower, jumping on a trampoline/rebounding or dancing in my bedroom like a maniac—think Jennifer Beals in Flashdance kind of maniac—until I have completely exhausted myself, works best for me. The last two may seem counterproductive given I’m trying to overcome thyroid and adrenal issues, but much of that is the result of suppressing my voice and emotional junk robbing me energetically.

I’m sorry if that was too simplistic and not at all helpful. I’ve tried so many things in the past in an attempt to heal but I seem to respond best to keeping things uncomplicated and in most aspects, enjoyable. I know many people have found the following helpful but most isolated supplements/drugs, consuming foods I hate because they’re supposedly healthy or avoiding foods I enjoy because they’re supposedly unhealthy, and expending tons of energy on special breath work techniques, nervous system retraining therapies etc., just stressed me and my body out more.

No, not too simplistic, and it certainly was helpful! Thank you for such a thorough response. I love those light shows, and I want to get some Legos too. It sounds like you have an awesome best friend.

I hope you don’t mind if I ask you questions in the future. You’ve been a helpful resource!

 

[Jennifer]

You’re welcome, @Vileplume! :) I’m glad it was helpful. Yeah, my friend is amazing!

Absolutely! Feel free to ask me questions anytime. :)

 

[Vileplume]

Hey again, Jennifer. First off, as I clicked over to this thread, I noticed that it has over 156,000 views. That’s mind-boggling. Your reflections and knowledge have reached hundreds of thousands of people. That’s such an awesome contribution to the world. Way to go!!

I have a question about thyroid and cholesterol, because I know you have used cholesterol as a way of keeping tabs on how your thyroid supplementation is going. What cholesterol were you aiming for with the supplementation? How did you know when your cholesterol was to low? What cholesterol number did you settle at?

Before supplementation, my cholesterol was at 206, and after about 2 months on 6 drops tyromax my cholesterol is at 184. I would love to add one more drop of tyromax, but do you think 184 is fine and I should not risk lowering my cholesterol further?

Thank you, as always.

 

[Jennifer]

Thank you, @Vileplume! :) I’m very grateful for people taking the time to read the log. Being a shy person, it was slightly terrifying for me to share my thoughts on a public forum but my hope was that by doing so, someone might gain something positive from it, even if that something was simply knowing that they’re not alone in the fight, and totally worth fighting for—that they matter.

I’m still trying to find the exact quote where Ray said what a safe cholesterol range is when supplementing thyroid, but I’m almost sure it was 160–200. Stress hormones and depression start surfacing when my cholesterol gets below 150 so I try to keep it above 160. My cholesterol had dropped below 150 so I worked at raising it (mainly by lowering my fiber intake) so that I could safely increase my thyroid dose and thankfully, the last time it was checked it was up to 187.

It’s hard to say for sure but if going by my own experience, I think 184 is still high enough to safely add an extra drop of TyroMax, especially if you continue to get enough sugar for cholesterol production and go easy on the fiber. However, just to be on the safe side, you may want to have your cholesterol retested after a couple weeks or so given you already struggle with an elevated heart rate and hot flashes, which may make it difficult to tell by symptoms alone if your cholesterol has dropped too low?

 

[Vileplume]

Thank you, @Vileplume! :) I’m very grateful for people taking the time to read the log. Being a shy person, it was slightly terrifying for me to share my thoughts on a public forum but my hope was that by doing so, someone might gain something positive from it, even if that something was simply knowing that they’re not alone in the fight, and totally worth fighting for—that they matter.

I’m still trying to find the exact quote where Ray said what a safe cholesterol range is when supplementing thyroid, but I’m almost sure it was 160–200. Stress hormones and depression start surfacing when my cholesterol gets below 150 so I try to keep it above 160. My cholesterol had dropped below 150 so I worked at raising it (mainly by lowering my fiber intake) so that I could safely increase my thyroid dose and thankfully, the last time it was checked it was up to 187.

It’s hard to say for sure but if going by my own experience, I think 184 is still high enough to safely add an extra drop of TyroMax, especially if you continue to get enough sugar for cholesterol production and go easy on the fiber. However, just to be on the safe side, you may want to have your cholesterol retested after a couple weeks or so given you already struggle with an elevated heart rate and hot flashes, which may make it difficult to tell by symptoms alone if your cholesterol has dropped too low?

Thank you for the thoughtful reply! My temperatures are still not optimal, even when using T3 and tyromax, so I’m continuing to tweak things and see how it goes.

I will continue to test my cholesterol and use this as a guide. Thanks for being a helpful resource!

Also, I notice that in your “supplements” section of your signature, it looks like you are using tyromix instead of tyromax. How has the transition been? I’m thinking myself that a higher T3:T4 ratio might work better.

 

[Vins7]

How do you distribuye your meals? How many meals do you do per day? Is difficult for me imagine eating 2500kcals just with fruit, How do you do It?

Don't you feel bloated or cold with so many liquids?

 

[Jennifer]

My pleasure, @Vileplume! That sounds like an excellent plan.

This isn’t the quote I was thinking of, but I came across this one while looking for it:

“Q: Is 220 a good sign of a strong thyroid?

RP: Yes, anywhere from 160-230 is good, but if your thyroid is very active your cholesterol will probably go down to 200 or 190. There is this mirror-image relationship behind cholesterol and thyroid function.”

I just switched to the TyroMix so unfortunately, I don't have much to report yet. I decided to experiment with it because my sinus gets blocked randomly throughout the day, which always happens when I’ve ingested something that has irritated my intestines. Since my mum had diarrhea from TyroMax until she started taking it in gelatin caps and my only other supplement (D3) is in water, I’ve been suspecting the TyroMax—I take it 5x a day. I’m experimenting with taking the TyroMix transdermally (in my navel) so I’m still trying to figure out a proper dose, since absorption rate is now a factor and the T4/T3 ratio is different than NDT’s.

 

[Jennifer]

How do you distribuye your meals? How many meals do you do per day? Is difficult for me imagine eating 2500kcals just with fruit, How do you do It?

Don't you feel bloated or cold with so many liquids?

I no longer consume just fruit but when I did, I rarely juiced it. A typical meal would be roughly 1360 g of fruit—my staples were different varieties of melon and grapes—with 454 g of young coconut meat. Snacks would be freeze-dried fruit like mango and dragonfruit, and fresh dates, often 8 or more in a sitting, things like that.

The majority of my calories now come from raw goat’s milk, and the rest from cheese, eggs, a couple varieties of raw honey, smaller amounts of fruit—a large variety of wild berries, donut peaches, figs—and homemade ice cream a couple times a week. I typically have eggs and a glass of vanilla bean infused milk sweetened with raw honey for breakfast, a liter of milk, 28–57 g of cheese, and some fruit for lunch, and the same meal for dinner, and raw honey all throughout the day.

 

[Vins7]

I no longer consume just fruit but when I did, I rarely juiced it. A typical meal would be roughly 1360 g of fruit—my staples were different varieties of melon and grapes—with 454 g of young coconut meat. Snacks would be freeze-dried fruit like mango and dragonfruit, and fresh dates, often 8 or more in a sitting, things like that.

The majority of my calories now come from raw goat’s milk, and the rest from cheese, eggs, a couple varieties of raw honey, smaller amounts of fruit—a large variety of wild berries, donut peaches, figs—and homemade ice cream a couple times a week. I typically have eggs and a glass of vanilla bean infused milk sweetened with raw honey for breakfast, a liter of milk, 28–57 g of cheese, and some fruit for lunch, and the same meal for dinner, and raw honey all throughout the day.

So, for healing at first, did you need to eat mainly fruit and now you can eat more animal foods such as milk and eggs?

And most of your problems (even dygestive issues) were related to lymphatic system and detoxification?

Really inspiring Jennifer.

 

[Jennifer]

Thank you, @Vins7. :)

In hindsight, what I really needed was to clear the SIBO I had and heal the resulting gut damage from having gone untreated for years due to a misdiagnosis. I think the healing I experienced with fruit had mostly to do with its ease of digestion. Due to poor thyroid function and a compressed digestive tract from my spine collapsing, food passes through my intestines at a slower rate, making me susceptible to overgrowths, and ripe fruit just happens to be one of the easiest foods for me to digest. Goat’s milk was the real game changer, though, and I suspect most of my problems were a consequence of poor thyroid function and the resulting injury.

 

[Jennifer]

Edit: Removed double post.

 

[Jennifer]

Update:

It officially makes a year that I’ve been consuming a dairy-based diet so after a decade of severe rashes, constipation, depression, brain fog, anaphylaxis and a few false starts, I think it’s safe to say that I’m finally tolerating dairy again. I’m really glad I didn’t give up on it. There are so many reason why I love it, but the main one is what it does for my bones. My bone density is improving so there’s a real possibility I may actually achieve my goal of getting this little lemon of mine up a mountain. ??

My health overall is excellent now. I contribute it not only to diet but the release work I’ve done, some major self-love and acceptance, and tapping into my intuition and playful side more and my mind and “adulting” side less. I realized that life doesn’t just happen to me, I happen to life and so I decided that I wasn’t going to wait until life was no longer difficult to be happy and have made it a priority to do what brings me joy. Suffice it to say that I feel pretty incredible and so at peace, most days now.

With that said, one of the loves of my life passed away last week and even though I’m happy she’s free, I don’t know this world without my grandmother physically in it so it’s going to take time adjusting to that and having her with me in spirit now. She saw and got me in a way few people have and I will forever be grateful for having the opportunity to love, and be loved by, that beautiful, accepting, unconditionally loving and wonderfully stubborn, little French woman. I wouldn’t be the same without her.

It’s times like this where I’m learning to embrace and honor the fact that I’m human. In a world that seems to reject our humanness for a perpetually numbed, photoshopped, filtered, surgically enhanced, living the perfect destination, Instagram life, I’m learning that it’s okay to not always be okay. It’s okay to be sad, lonely, insecure, anxious, frustrated, and God forbid even helpless, at times. It doesn’t mean anything is wrong with me or that I shouldn’t feel the way I feel just because it’s uncomfortable.

I’ve also been learning to trust my inner knowing that I don’t have to struggle or settle to have health, that it can come naturally and in a way that brings me joy and is, in fact, a byproduct of living my joy. I don’t have to chase it or resign myself to a life of raw meat, kale smoothies, meditating on a pillow for hours a day or living as a fruitarian recluse in some jungle, forced to forgo personal hygiene and cr*p in a dirt hole just so I can have access to good fruit. I can actually have health and indoor plumbing.

Speaking of fruitarians, I no longer worship the sun. Thankfully, I only require a minimal amount of it now, since I don’t care for it or heat nearly as much as I used to. I think in the past, because I was so tiny, cold and unable to keep my vitamin D level up, I was desperate for the sun and too much of a purist to just supplement. As a child, I was drawn to the shade and now that my temps are stable (average 99°), I find myself drawn to it again, and my fair skin is happier for it. My grandmother was right!

As for my diet, I no longer need as many carbs to prevent hypoglycemia. The majority of my calories come from animal proteins now and the rest from mostly raw honey and to a lesser extent fruit. Goat’s milk was a real game changer for me and I was happy to learn that the farm I used to get my raw cow’s milk from during my WAPF days, started raising goats and selling goat’s milk, too. They practice calf at foot, something that’s important to me. I go into more detail on the practice here if anyone is interested:

Impossible Milk Is Incoming

Sadly, with all the science and health advice I’ve accumulated over the years, I got so used to selecting foods based on what the “experts” deem healthy that it took trialing a wide variety for me to remember which foods I actually enjoy and not too surprising, they’re the same foods I enjoyed as a child when my mind was free of dietary dogma. What was surprising was discovering that I don’t actually care for most tropical fruit. The following is a list of my current diet and supplements:

PROTEINS (30%)

• Local pastured raw skimmed goat's milk
• Local pastured soy-free eggs (scrambled, omelette, quiche, custard, egg drop soup)
• Goat’s milk gouda—made with rennet (Whole Foods [Spring Koe] and Trader Joe’s)
• Homemade fresh curds
• Local wild sea scallops (downeastdayboat.com and www.vitalchoice.com)

CARBOHYDRATES (60%)

• Pastured goat’s milk
• Cherries
• North American pawpaw
• Figs—black, brown and green
• Peaches—white fleshed Saturn
• Melon—honeydew, canary and watermelon
• Grapes—black, cotton candy, jam and pink muscat
• Berries—black mulberries, black raspberries, boysenberries, goldenberries, golden raspberries, heirloom raspberries, heirloom strawberries, honeyberries, Idaho huckleberries, marionberries, saskatoon berries, wild bilberries, wild blue huckleberries, wild mountain blackberries, wild strawberries (home grown and nwwildfoods.com)
• Sweet corn—white sugar variety (grilled on the cob and in clambakes)
• Onions—Vidalias (for French onion soup)
• Dates—Sukkari (soaked in milk overnight then strained to remove fiber)
• Raw honey—(Altay Meadows’ acacia—amishhoney.com, Wendell Estate—wendellestate.ca, Eisele’s—eiseleshoney.com)
• Maple syrup (from my uncle’s trees)

FATS (10%)

• Goat’s milk gouda
• Local pastured eggs
• Avocados (occasionally)

SEASONINGS

• Culinary herbs and spices—cinnamon, vanilla beans, orange peal, chives, dill, parsley, rainbow peppercorns, tarragon
• Refined additive-free kosher salt (Diamond Crystal)

MISCELLANEOUS

• Mushroom broth—a mix of varieties (used as a beef stock replacement for my French onion soup)
• Cacao nibs for brewed iced cocoa—mycotoxin-free (www.addictivewellness.com and supervitalfoods.com)

SUPPLEMENTS (daily)

• NDT 2 grains (TyroMax)
• Vitamin D3 2000 IU (bio-alternatives.net)

I still seems surreal that I’ve made it this far. To no longer be fighting to stand on my own, to walk, bathe, feed myself, counting down the hours until bedtime because in my dreams, I could run, I wasn’t broken. To no longer feel like a bystander in my own life, having mentally detached myself from my body because it was too painful to be in it, both physically from the injury and emotionally from the abuse. I finally feel in my body and it feels so light, like the weight of the world has been lifted off of it.

This might sound crazy, but I’m so grateful I had the chance to fight for myself. Having kept silent every time I was abused and finally release the guilt and shame I felt, to no longer feel anything but compassion for all those involved, and make peace with it being a part of my story, is so freeing and healing. I now understand the damage caused by holding on to that kind of energy, and how the burden of someone else’s guilt, shame and lack of love was never mine to bear yet I bore it for years.

As a little girl growing up Catholic, I feared that I wouldn’t be accepted into heaven for having kept silent while being molested, and didn’t have the courage to tell my family. Had I not suffered the injury and broken my filter, I might not have found the courage to speak up and instead, taken that secret with me to the grave, likely an early grave. Breaking my back was one of the best things that ever happened for me. I found my voice. I hope I’ve made you proud, Mem.


View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FcOkmShJG9Q