It's funny how "male issues" are always self-driven, i.e., men are always made out as losers in the world, whereas females never have to "woman up"

[Makrosky]

This goes back to the dating strategy you mentioned earlier, which I dubbed "social circle game". It's the most successful dating strategy a man can employ today IMO. Obviously, when you're in constant contact with girls, be it at school, work, etc., it's going to be A LOT easier to get dates. I'll repeat once again that humans naturally gravitate towards people they're around regularly. This is true for platonic as well as romantic relationships. Long before the MeToo era, the workplace was a common and socially-accepted place to find romantic partners. I believe some cultures today, including Japan, still embrace the office as a key method for finding partners. Companies are more strict today, HR may be ok with the practice in some instances.

Yes, there are some men out there having success dating today. I haven't read this entire thread in detail, but from what I can see, not a single person here has made the claim that literally no man out there is achieving dating success. What is being debated is the statistics behind it. What proportion of men are having success dating today?

Yes, there are some ugly guys that are able to date attractive girls. Anomalies happen; if you read The Game by Neil Strauss, he highlights a guy he met who had a haram of women all exclusive to him, even though the guy was butt-ugly (this was pre-Tinder, but you get my point). What proportion of ugly guys are having great dating success today?

Some people have come into this thread with real data to support their assertions, while others bring useless anecdotes. It's important to understand the difference. I merely came in here to share my own experience. I personally don't care if it's harder or easier for a man to date girls in the year 2022 vs. 2002. It doesn't change my own strategy, which is to keep approaching girls I find attractive while simultaneously trying to become the most attractive version of myself that I can be.

With that, I'll drop this specific topic.

Thanks for the comment. It happens to me the opposite. I am a chicken when it comes to go to action with women in the workplace. I have had many attention in my current job with many and I have managed to spoil it EVERY SINGLE TIME I tried. Luckily not witj all of them. To me it feels so awkward to move forward besides game flirting that I start to behave weirdly and maybe even sabotagging myselt. It doesn't happen in other contexts. So it is good to read your comment because I thought this might be the norm. It turns out from what I am seeing also it is not. Damn.

 

[DrivesOldTruck]

what is your race? Phenotype matters more than visible markers of health/facial development. East asian men in the US are consistently emasculated by media and do poorly in dating as a result of that while their women have the highest rate of interracial marriage (with white men) and are at the top of the dating hierarchy. As a result, East asian men have to resort to travelling overseas to their native country in order to get married. In Europe and US it would not be very easy for a South asian man either, even if he's healthy, robust and attractive to his own women. African women are an example of females that consistently get underrated on the dating scene and have a harder time finding a partner in the US. Conversely, even the most average white men (north european, blue eyes) can get thousands of matches in east asia because the phenotype is idealised by the people there.

I understand full well exactly what you're saying. I don't want to give specifics here, I'll say that my race/phenotype is not one that women filter out.

 

[ursidae]

Yes but why is it idealized? Is it because of media OR is it because of something inherent and universal?

I think a good amount of the Peaters who are white and male would consistently like to believe that it's the latter. Personally, I strongly disagree, but as a woman, and one originating from a filthy southeastern country, my opinion shouldn't matter anyway.

 

[Vanset]

social circle 'maxxing' is definitely the way. OD are just harem apps for the top males, this is old news. college/uni, dance classes, art classes, religious communities, workplace etc., is definitely the way to go for an average male. the problem is that slowly everything is moving towards online and the pandemic accelerated that.

if someone is interested in this topic more in depth from the perspective of incels/blackpillers/redpillers i recommend a yt channel called Incelmatics and his documentary, it's his most popular video. now some things are just wacky and you should not pay much attention to them, some incel inside jokes and memes.

you have to be open minded tho, because this is deep, deep waters and yet just a starting point

here's the link for the lazy ones


View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jt8JMQUoKto&t=201s

 

[PolishSun]

Talking about healthy, it is not the clothes or gadgets or make up that show the health of the person, brand clothes can make somebody look cooler, but I can recognize in the street which people use good food and supplements like aminos, b's and minerals in good amounts. The quality of the skin, build, frame. They are never too thin because they have muscles (even women). I think they are usually on paleo or some similar diets with a lot of meat (my guess). The difference is big between them and regular people who do not eat healthy or use supplements. I see maybe 10 such people a year, but I am not searching on purpose. It is just people on regular diets and regular lifestyle do look crapy nowadays. If you get used to the looks of regular people then it looks fine, but i know more then that.

 

[Jonnie]

social circle 'maxxing' is definitely the way. OD are just harem apps for the top males, this is old news. college/uni, dance classes, art classes, religious communities, workplace etc., is definitely the way to go for an average male. the problem is that slowly everything is moving towards online and the pandemic accelerated that.

if someone is interested in this topic more in depth from the perspective of incels/blackpillers/redpillers i recommend a yt channel called Incelmatics and his documentary, it's his most popular video. now some things are just wacky and you should not pay much attention to them, some incel inside jokes and memes.

you have to be open minded tho, because this is deep, deep waters and yet just a starting point

here's the link for the lazy ones


View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jt8JMQUoKto&t=201s

I've gained a lot of insight from the blackpill but it was also extremely depressing...

It forces you to take an objective look at the raw harsh data side to life. Nature can be cruel.

Have had to accept a few uncomfortable truths but has helped me to know exactly where I stand now and have come full circle back into the white pill.


Perhaps not neccesarily for everyone but personally I've always been drawn to explore the deeper, darker edges.

 

[haidut]

Perhaps not neccesarily for everyone but personally I've always been drawn to explore the deeper, darker edges.

It's an indispensable part of being a realist, even if it gets rough sometimes. As they say - "life starts where your comfort zone ends".

 

[ursidae]

Talking about healthy, it is not the clothes or gadgets or make up that show the health of the person, brand clothes can make somebody look cooler, but I can recognize in the street which people use good food and supplements like aminos, b's and minerals in good amounts. The quality of the skin, build, frame. They are never too thin because they have muscles (even women). I think they are usually on paleo or some similar diets with a lot of meat (my guess). The difference is big between them and regular people who do not eat healthy or use supplements. I see maybe 10 such people a year, but I am not searching on purpose. It is just people on regular diets and regular lifestyle do look crapy nowadays. If you get used to the looks of regular people then it looks fine, but i know more then that.

if those are random people on the street, how can you know they're taking supplements and dieting? Most of the healthy robust looking people I meet are 1) young 2) doing neither of those things. And those that are very into dieting and supplementation tend to have sickly appearance which is why they got into it in the first place. Just saw a man shopping at the grocery store, cart was full of organic fruit and wild caught meats like venison. He was balding and overall aged and very unhealthy looking

 

[FocusedOnHealth]

The symbol of beauty in Persia from the 1900s is not what you expected

In celebration of whatever you want to dress, act, and look like.

explore.newsner.com

I couldn't get turned on and I certainly don't lack sexual hormones. I will gladly need some extra stimulus to get interested sexually.
Are you saying I am unhealthy because of that?

Those women in the link you posted look like men! I honestly cannot imagine that this was “it” back in the day. Yikes!

 

[haidut]

Those women in the link you posted look like men! I honestly cannot imagine that this was “it” back in the day. Yikes!

If you like them, you'll absolutely love these then

Bearded Women

Photo of Bearded Women

www.popsugar.com

View: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/493777546636829143/

 

[FocusedOnHealth]

Are you speaking from personal experience? Every single person I know IRL that makes this exact claim to me has been a man who is age 40+, married, has kids, and hasn't been in the dating scene since the release of Tinder (2012).

These guys look at me and say, "How can you not be having success when you have tools like Tinder at your disposal? It's never been easier to meet girls!"

Here’s a suggestion for anyone: find a specific interest or group where you might be hanging out with like minded people. Could be sports, save the whales, a cooking club, wine club, whatever. Tinder is not the be all end all. To me it is very shallow. I never did it. My husband found me and vice versa at a gathering of people who had things in common and it was a great way to get to know someone in person, not as a stranger via the internet. That one on one getting to know someone is great. Look for groups where you might have a common interest with someone.

 

[FocusedOnHealth]

If you like them, you'll absolutely love these then

Bearded Women

Photo of Bearded Women

www.popsugar.com

Hideous! Thank God I am no longer modeling. I would be totally embarrassed to have to wear that look. Something changed in the last 10 years in the modeling field. The designers got, well, psycho.. I just read an article where they are now featuring jock straps as a fashion statement….I mean, come on! Insanity.
oh, and they were wearing them on their head…nuts!

 

[DrivesOldTruck]

Here’s a suggestion for anyone: find a specific interest or group where you might be hanging out with like minded people. Could be sports, save the whales, a cooking club, wine club, whatever. Tinder is not the be all end all. To me it is very shallow. I never did it. My husband found me and vice versa at a gathering of people who had things in common and it was a great way to get to know someone in person, not as a stranger via the internet. That one on one getting to know someone is great. Look for groups where you might have a common interest with someone.

@Makrosky already mentioned this earlier, but it's still a good suggestion. This is especially powerful if you move to a new city and need to make new friends.

 

[FocusedOnHealth]

Because you are a tall chad my friend.

Tall chads are nice, I’ve been surrounded by tall chads, (no offense to forum chads) but what really gets a women interested, is can the guy make her laugh…honestly. A genuinely funny guy will get you all the time. That’s a fact. You can go a long way with humor and not necessarily look like a stud in the gym. It shows you have a personality and like to have fun. That’s what charmed me with my hubby. He has that Irish sense of humor.….and yes he’s got a nice rugged Irish bone structure. But if he was just a Chad with no personality, forget it! Boring! Really, I think it’s about confidence. If a guy doen’t care what people think about him, that’s very appealing.

 

[Jonnie]

Tall chads are nice, I’ve been surrounded by tall chads, (no offense to forum chads) but what really gets a women interested, is can the guy make her laugh…honestly. A genuinely funny guy will get you all the time. That’s a fact. You can go a long way with humor and not necessarily look like a stud in the gym. It shows you have a personality and like to have fun. That’s what charmed me with my hubby. He has that Irish sense of humor.….and yes he’s got a nice rugged Irish bone structure. But if he was just a Chad with no personality, forget it! Boring! Really, I think it’s about confidence. If a guy doen’t care what people think about him, that’s very appealing.

You could be right about a few things there.
Unironically I've also taught myself to never listen to woman for advice.

 

[FocusedOnHealth]

You could be right about a few things there.
Unironically I've also taught myself to never listen to woman for advice.

What parts am I right about?

 

[Jonnie]

It's an indispensable part of being a realist, even if it gets rough sometimes. As they say - "life starts where your comfort zone ends".

Absolutely. It's also how we can potentially solve these things in the future.

 

[Ignoramus]

Since I started meditating and getting into spirituality I've been doing well with women. I think 'vibes' are real; I used to think they weren't. I think having a good metabolism/vibe makes it easy to attract people and to make friends. When you're in this state you're focusing on the other person and the energy dynamic you are having together; you want the best for them and they reflect that back to you Sex becomes more of an afterthought - it's just another way to feel good together, but you can also do that by laughing and joking around. When you're in a desperate state it is really obvious to others

 

[Ignoramus]

Since I started meditating and getting into spirituality I've been doing well with women. I think 'vibes' are real; I used to think they weren't. I think having a good metabolism/vibe makes it easy to attract people and to make friends. When you're in this state you're focusing on the other person and the energy dynamic you are having together; you want the best for them and they reflect that back to you Sex becomes more of an afterthought - it's just another way to feel good together, but you can also do that by laughing and joking around. When you're in a desperate state it is really obvious to others

And I should say that I used to be the world's biggest incel! If anybody is reading this and feeling bad about their situation then just know that it can get much better! You can become a very loveable person (you already are- it's just difficult to share love in your current perspective/energy) by choosing to think and feel loving thoughts, and to always follow what feels the 'highest'. You can change your reality very quickly! If you have doubts about this process then you will lose nothing by at least trying it! See what happens ?

 

[FocusedOnHealth]

Since I started meditating and getting into spirituality I've been doing well with women. I think 'vibes' are real; I used to think they weren't. I think having a good metabolism/vibe makes it easy to attract people and to make friends. When you're in this state you're focusing on the other person and the energy dynamic you are having together; you want the best for them and they reflect that back to you Sex becomes more of an afterthought - it's just another way to feel good together, but you can also do that by laughing and joking around. When you're in a desperate state it is really obvious to others

Bingo, that’s it. Feeling good together, emotionally, spiritually is where it’s at. When you are focused on the other person more than what you can “get” from them, things just flow. Genuinely being interested in the other person. That may sound like a cliche, but it’s true. Of course there’s gotta be that attraction, but being on the same wavelength makes things flow, where you are not trying to achieve something, but you are just “being” in the moment, Enjoying the other person’s company. You don’t sound like an Ignoramus btw.