Help Requested: How To Heal From Masturbation, Mentally And Physiologically

CDT

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So many of you here might already be acquainted with my journey to reduce, ultimately eliminate PMO. I started this because I noticed a significant change in mood and psychology (for the worse) when I had my extreme bout during the Summer of 2018. Since then, I have consciously tried to eliminate masturbation, to no avail as I keep relapsing when I am in a condition that elicits a relapse. Also, many people don't believe it, but I think that masturbation also affects hair growth, or inhibits it, more specifically. I noticed that I have medium length vellous hairs that sprouted over my period of abstinence, and the hair grew considerably thicker. Again, nutrition and supplementation were unchanged factors in this observation.

This is a narrative on my most recent relapse, as of yesterday, which was after a 72 day period of abstinence. Honestly, I feel absolutely terrible. I really wish that I could have done anything else but relapse, but I did, and I ended up doing so 4 times within 24 hours.

I am posing the inquiry here as people here tend to be much more in line with evidence based approaches and are generous enough to provide much more descriptive and insightful anecdotes than on other forums I have visited: How can I recover from this? I never thought I would relapse again and its tearing me apart. From a physiological perspective, can I recover from this? I worked so hard trying to get some hair regrowth these past two months, and I feel like all my progress has been lost. I think I know what I wrong: I got complacent. I stopped tending to my daily journal, I stopped caring about masturbation, and I stopped the intention. Ultimately, my mental discipline weakened over the 72 day period because I started to feel "normal" again and thought I could ride it out to infinity and beyond. That obviously wasn't the case, and here I am, imploring to anyone who can provide some perspective. Thank you all so much for your time, and I wish you all the best of health.
 

Soren

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I don't think you should be so hard on yourself. 72 days is very good. I don't believe that you've wiped out all progress. If there is a connection between hair loss and masturbation it is probably down to chronically elevated prolactin but having a relapse and an acute elevation does not wipe out all the time where your prolactin has been lower.

If you're really worried about the relapse you might want to try something like metergoline as a form of "damage control" after a relapse although based on what you've said here I don't think that is necessary or even wise.

It seems to me that mentally you have placed too much weight in this and it has made you unnecessarily anxious. Life is about balance, total abstinence from sexual activity is not necessarily a good thing and it is unlikely to be a cureall for hairloss. There are many factors involved.

My own hair growth has greatly improved by following the advice on perfecthairhealth.com. This is a series of daily scalp massages to break up calcification and increase blood flow. Don't know if you've seen this but check out the before and afters they are impressive. It's greatly helped my hair loss.
 
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CDT

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I don't think you should be so hard on yourself. 72 days is very good. I don't believe that you've wiped out all progress. If there is a connection between hair loss and masturbation it is probably down to chronically elevated prolactin but having a relapse and an acute elevation does not wipe out all the time where your prolactin has been lower.

If you're really worried about the relapse you might want to try something like metergoline as a form of "damage control" after a relapse although based on what you've said here I don't think that is necessary or even wise.

It seems to me that mentally you have placed too much weight in this and it has made you unnecessarily anxious. Life is about balance, total abstinence from sexual activity is not necessarily a good thing and it is unlikely to be a cureall for hairloss. There are many factors involved.

My own hair growth has greatly improved by following the advice on perfecthairhealth.com. This is a series of daily scalp massages to break up calcification and increase blood flow. Don't know if you've seen this but check out the before and afters they are impressive. It's greatly helped my hair loss.
Thanks a lot! I've actually been in contact with Rob and we discuss scalp massages in depth. I do them everyday in conjunction with handstands. Ill try to start oilin more consistently, as I actually regrow my hair beyond its natural thickness back in 2017 with a combination of the three
 

GorillaHead

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I don't think you should be so hard on yourself. 72 days is very good. I don't believe that you've wiped out all progress. If there is a connection between hair loss and masturbation it is probably down to chronically elevated prolactin but having a relapse and an acute elevation does not wipe out all the time where your prolactin has been lower.

If you're really worried about the relapse you might want to try something like metergoline as a form of "damage control" after a relapse although based on what you've said here I don't think that is necessary or even wise.

It seems to me that mentally you have placed too much weight in this and it has made you unnecessarily anxious. Life is about balance, total abstinence from sexual activity is not necessarily a good thing and it is unlikely to be a cureall for hairloss. There are many factors involved.

My own hair growth has greatly improved by following the advice on perfecthairhealth.com. This is a series of daily scalp massages to break up calcification and increase blood flow. Don't know if you've seen this but check out the before and afters they are impressive. It's greatly helped my hair loss.
Massaging actually thickened you’re hair. How confident Are you of this?
 
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CDT

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Massaging actually thickened you’re hair. How confident Are you of this?
Very. As in, I regrew a lot of my hair through massaging and oiling in 2017, fapped a lot in 2018, lost a lot of my hair, and its coming back with gusto in 2019 after reinstating the massage and handstand regimen. Still got the some work on the temples though...
 

Tarmander

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I don't think you should be so hard on yourself.

This. You are making progress, be proud of yourself.

Also, you need an outlet man. Creative would be the best. Don't clench your teeth and try and to muscle it. Channel the energy is the only way
 

Vinny

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How about finding a good girl and replacing the fap with a healthy satisfactory relationship? Never thought resolving it from that perspective?
 

Teres

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@Vinny +1

These quests to stop playing with yourself for months or forever are..worthless. I just have been told that there are sites and forums dedicated to this.

I find it worthless not because I don't think masturbation is damaging. I do. The problem is that..masturbation isn't the problem itself, but it's symptom. And this is something many people either fail to realize, or are lying to themselves.
They get pumped up - "I'll not masturbate for half a year. I'm gonna change my life!"

No, you are not changing anything. You're treating your runny nose and enduring the flu, without taking care of the core problem. I bet some do but who knows how many?

Masturbation is a symptom of a problem and a [cowardly] way to fill a void. Let's be honest here. If you are in a healthy state of being, both physiologically and psychologically, if there's something meaningful you love doing, if you are activelly engaged with life, then you have no problem and there wouldn't be the symptom we're talking about. That's why people "relapse". They perceive the habit of masturbation as the problem, they endure the quest for months and..once again fall asleep with a hand in the pants. Why? I bet quite often nothing is being changed apart from not looking at entertaining pixels.
And by psychologically healthy I mean not being a coward.

Be socially and sexually active with women, be responsible for yourself and do something that - out of enthusiasm for it - doesn't let you fall asleep at night. If you have time to masturbate, you have too much free time.

And of course - no pill or substance will help you fully recover if you don't take steps such as these above.
 

Nebula

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Undoing the physiological damage of excessive ejaculation from masturbation is something that should be better studied. I don’t think anyone has all the answers. The damage seems real though and is not just something simple like dopamine desensitization as lots of the nofapers report not feeling any better or even worse after even a year of refraining from masturbation and porn.

I would focus on nourishing the brain and gonads.

Some things that may help and probably won’t hurt:
Low dose bromocriptine (0.8 mg)
Diet high in zinc (beef, oysters not supplements)
Uridine Monophosphate
DHA from sea food (dha supplements are sketchy, but the best quality are probably safe in a small dose, raw seafood from sushi and oysters is safest though)
Egg yolks
P5P B6
Gelatin/glycine
Exposure to bright daylight (preferably all day long, but at least for an hour in the morning)

Psychologically I think the way to reduce excessive masturbation is to focus on getting plenty of positive natural stimulation from real life and friendships. The primate in a zoo masturbates a lot because he’s bored, lonely, feels trapped and bombarded with unnatural stimuli. Basically the same conditions as a lot of modern men.

Close secure social bonds are a need, not a luxury. Otherwise healthy people can commit suicide or get violent without secure positive social bonds. It’s a need. Oxytocin release is a primary drive for mammals.

Plenty of real sex doesn’t necesarily satisfy this drive completely. There’s lots of masturbation addicts who also get lots of real sex. The deeper drive is to feel connected and needed in something positive and meaningful. Volunteering to help suffering people, or acts of service for friends, family, neighbors etc. Participating in sports, music groups, of any other kind of social hobby also help the brain to feel like it’s getting enough oxytocin release.

I see excessive porn and masturbation as a social deficiency that can be exacerbated by suboptimal brain metabolic health. It’s better to focus on addressing those things directly rather than hope abstaining alone will “reboot” you. It doesn’t seem to be nearly enough.
 
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I don't masturbate or watch porn since February of 2018. 21 months strict no fap. Not even once. Honestly I don't feel any difference. Makes me think NoFAP movement is kinda pure marketing/cult sort of things. Anyways I'm going to continue practicing it, probably life-long.
 

Nebula

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I don't masturbate or watch porn since February of 2018. 21 months strict no fap. Not even once. Honestly I don't feel any difference. Makes me think NoFAP movement is kinda pure marketing/cult sort of things. Anyways I'm going to continue practicing it, probably life-long.
The theory behind nofap is probably wrong. A “reboot” doesn’t automatically fix the root causes. There’s more going on than just dopamine desensitization. There’s nothing wrong with deciding not to masturbate and watch porn. It’s probably a net positive for most guys, but simply abstaining doesn’t seem to heal the damage of excessive ejaculation in a lot of people or fix underlying issues that were already there. There’s clearly some metabolic and social issues that need to be addressed.
 
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Feeling physically bad after ejaculation is some kind of disease-state,and people need to fix their diet
and micronutrient deficiencies.
 

boris

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CDT have you ever thought that what you are experiencing is purely psychological? Your text sounds like are stressing about this a lot.

I don‘t see anything scientific about this nofap movement, not to call it utter bull****.
 

Nebula

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Feeling physically bad after ejaculation is some kind of disease-state,and people need to fix their diet
and micronutrient deficiencies.
It’s more complicated than micronutrient deficiency. The pituitary probably isn’t evolved for multiple prolactin spikes every day. The pituitary isn’t always easy to calm down with just diet. Some prolactin inhibitor along with zinc rich diet might work.

Thyroid + proviron/dht might be therapeutic to restore androgen sensitivity.
 

boris

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Honestly, I feel absolutely terrible. I really wish that I could have done anything else but relapse, but I did

This is the biggest problem. Your attitude towards this whole topic.
 

Nebula

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CDT have you ever thought that what you are experiencing is purely psychological? Your text sounds like are stressing about this a lot.

I don‘t see anything scientific about this nofap movement, not to call it utter bull****.
The issue of excessive ejaculation causing metabolic damage is real, but their solution is inadequate in most cases. Refraining from ejaculation for a long period probably won’t likely fix underlying metabolic and social issues.
 

redsun

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The issue of excessive ejaculation causing metabolic damage is real

No it isn't. If you are already metabolically ****88 by eating a bad diet or lets say a vegetarian or vegan diet or keto diet or any diet that is inheritantly inadequate but touted as healthy by mainstream then everything you do will be "metabolically damaging" because you are basically a walking corpse with no vitality because you eat trash or incorrectly.
 

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