Heading Into Overpouring Abundance

Joined
Jul 20, 2016
Messages
315
Hey whats up guys am starting a new journey that I want to document and type about and share along the way with concepts and ideas I've learned over the years.

So where I am currently is in a weird state. I have had this same state of being on loop for over a couple years now which is utterly depressing, hopeless, and helpless - not really getting anything done, having fatigue, having brain fog, losing motiviation, being irritated frequently, not really having emotions or feelings and feeling like a broke person.

So that is where I am coming from, it is so much better than what it use to be but still do not feel quite right, I have faced many hard and terrible days isolated and away from a lot of the world because the way i was functioning made me want to avoid everything and everyone because I felt broke. I still feel this way and have minor brain fog even as I am typing this but it is much better than what it was. I really just have a desire to fully be myself again and to just feel normal and I feel like it is on the horizon and hope to reach this soon.

So where I want to head is to a state of thriving, which is basically a few bumps up the state of being chart from where I am now. Having a **** ton of energy, killing it financially, having tons of friends rich in being and abundant warmth and connectedness, being a warm open and loving person and have an amazing sex life. Ultimately just living a sexy life full of life.

My biggest issue right now is the brain fog / confusion like feelings and deadness emotionwise. It is such a ******* damper and I have felt this for well over a year and its like ground hog day. I feel stuck because of this. And its like wake up .."okay its still there, I know how this days going to go", day is uber boring and thennnnn go to bed. I need to bring life back into my vessel and start overflowing life into life. That is where its at. Also have this non sexuality feeling in my genitals which is annoying. Sometimes can have a decent libido but other times it just feels....dead and numb no fire no passion no nothing. Its a huge annoyance of mine that it doesn't work.

So how I plan to get there is obviously with diet and beasting out on calories as well as utilizing hormones and other supplements which can contribute to my well being. Currently don't have clear indications on my temps or calorie count, but I have a decent guess and with temps I know I am in the 97.9 - 98.3 range usually with temps breaking into 99. For calories I usally eat 2000-2500 so currently undereating.

I think that my enviornment may contain mold in it, but it is hard to get out due to not working really for the last year and not having enough financially to make a move. I really would love to move as my current environment really sucks the life out of me and is a total drain. Debt has also stacked up a bit which makes it harder for me to make a play. Long story short being not well sucks and most people don't truly understand which can be painful, it feels like you are doing it on your own.

I currently have a mirad of supplements which I bounce around on which can be both very on point and also off because I have no idea what is doing what or when it is doing what. Most frequently taken are
MB - daily 2mg-5mg
Thyroid - on and off depeneding on how I feel
Pansterone - 2 drops once everyweek
Emodin - everynight
Phosphydatylserine
Vitamin e
Aspirin
Activated Charcoal
Penecillian
Taurine
Lisuride

Really I know what I desire is in reach, just need to tweak somehings, move out of my environment, build enough energy to inject my creative ideas back into my business and really get it going, getting out of this decreped state and into a fruitful being. This will be a place where I share a lot of my ideas and also my biochemical journey which will lead to overflowing abundance. I will mention ahead of time I am an open person and enjoy a range of topics and hope you enjoy what is to come
 

lampofred

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Joined
Feb 13, 2016
Messages
3,244
Sounds like depression. RP mentioned depression is a problem of insufficient pregnenolone and excess cortisol.

How is your diet in terms of total calories and protein intake? Are your temps/pulse good? Do you get light and vitamin D?

PUFA depletion, sunlight exposure (for both light and vitamin D), thyroid supplementation, high protein + salt intake, aspirin, sugar, high caloric intake, gelatin, thoughtlessness/avoiding rumination, etc. all shift hormones in the right direction.
 
OP
Elchapchapchapo
Joined
Jul 20, 2016
Messages
315
Hm interesting and yeah defintely depression, I havent had my Preg tested since last year, but I was in the higher range for preg. Curious your thoughts on supplementation assuming those conditions are still present. I need to just try pregnenonlone, take a big dose and see what happens, DHEA-S was also above range, and I doubt much really changed from the last year, but obviously need test to confirm this.

Sunlight exposure is a bare minimum, not much happens, I sleep alot as well and use red lights. I do use vitamin D but have to keep dose low due to getting manic like energy as well as insomina like energy from this. Maybe need to change brand here but use d3/k2 combo from throne.

Temps are usually 97.9 to 98.3 id say as a true average and can hit the 98.7-99 sometimes as well.
 

sunraiser

Member
Joined
Feb 21, 2017
Messages
549
Sounds like depression. RP mentioned depression is a problem of insufficient pregnenolone and excess cortisol.

How is your diet in terms of total calories and protein intake? Are your temps/pulse good? Do you get light and vitamin D?

PUFA depletion, sunlight exposure (for both light and vitamin D), thyroid supplementation, high protein + salt intake, aspirin, sugar, high caloric intake, gelatin, thoughtlessness/avoiding rumination, etc. all shift hormones in the right direction.

Cortisol being too low could also contribute to this though. That said, I think hormones fall into line once you're able to metabolise minerals and enough calories properly - the hard part is understanding what's wrong.
 

Runenight201

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Joined
Feb 18, 2018
Messages
1,942
What’s a day of eating like? Specifically, how do you prepare your meals? Do you practice yoga/meditation? How bloated are you? Can you touch your toes with your stomach drawn in? Are you able to walk? Are you able to run? Have you had moments, even short-lived, where you found enough energy to work on your hobbies/self for some amount of time? Or felt emotions/alive/good? What happened then to support such a state?
 
OP
Elchapchapchapo
Joined
Jul 20, 2016
Messages
315
Posting an update have been eating a bit more as of recent and am probably hitting 3k calories daily for the last two days. Am beginning to be super hungry even faster after eating. Its like I am constantly hungry, which I enjoy to one degree because its been so long since I have had such an appetite and also wonder about in another. I've read some posts about this before that it may not be a good sign but I'll worry about this later. Eating enough is huge on my plate right now. I

have had more moments of wellbeing but still have two problem areas which is one having an adrenaline like energy always up which causes me to behave weird and feel tense and just ahhhh weird in my body i hate it. This has been my biggest problem area I haven't quite figured out how to resolve. The same feeling contributes to weakness also and I feel so soft versus feeling grounded, strong, and alive in my body.

I think this may be from thyroid or MB I am not 100% sure

and 2 still having brain fog issues, with it running in the background hardly enough but enough to mess with me.

I have meditated today for the first time in forever which feels great it feels good to type and just journal and just release. Over the last few years I have really kept to myself and not talked alot as I sit behind my computer isolated from people which has been painful, and have become socially awkward but the awesome thing is the effortless vibing has returned with people in moments the last week. That feels great it feels like well being in conversation.

I am moving my focus towards cleaning things up, that means my enviornment, and my emotions and just emptying the slate everyday by typing. I am wanting to not rely on people so much in life for things, not saying never count on people etc. But I have been hurt and for some reason have clung to this pain and feel like I relive it everyday. Have thoughts come up that are basically like Im arguning with people sometimes that feel like anger and rage and also betrayl. I'm really looking to release this and get off this angry path and more into a path of wellbeing joy and peace. I grew up in an environment where anger was the primary emotion and arguments were usually the mode of communicaiton, so it's easy for me to push people away easy and want to make a conversation be about being right rather than about sharing moments of love and bliss with another.
 
OP
Elchapchapchapo
Joined
Jul 20, 2016
Messages
315
What’s a day of eating like? Specifically, how do you prepare your meals? Do you practice yoga/meditation? How bloated are you? Can you touch your toes with your stomach drawn in? Are you able to walk? Are you able to run? Have you had moments, even short-lived, where you found enough energy to work on your hobbies/self for some amount of time? Or felt emotions/alive/good? What happened then to support such a state?

Day of eating is as much as I can really, pretty open right now not super specific. Have been drinking tons of milk lately, up to 2.5 gallons this week and have also begun to drink orange juice with it. Had 1k+ calories of this alone today of the half and half mixture and then ate other food, not the best food choices to be honest fast food. But I prefer this over not eating which is what I was doing. Started mediation and have done yoga in the past. I do get bloated sometimes but take activated charcoal and vitamin e to knock this out. Yes I can walk and run. Yes have moments of well being. What supports this state is when the brain fog has disappeared and the wired liek feeling goes away in my body, when these exist it ***** up the whole reality to be honest which is crazy because it is so miniscule but also so loud in my experience
 
OP
Elchapchapchapo
Joined
Jul 20, 2016
Messages
315
I love the concept of abundance and the feelings emotions and lovingness that comes with it or from it. For me its like being plugged directly into the source of juciness and I have experienced great moments in the past of supreme abundance feeling absolutely great and thriving. This is a meditation I like to do to restore that and to build up an abundance of love and trust in myself and to create a loving union. it feels really warm and connected inside and that feeling is worth a million bucks. I plan to share a bunch more of content like this and plug in to this type of energy more frequently. Theres tons of people who tell me I am crazy for desiring a state like this frequently but I dont agree with them and just dont think they get it. I was sick for almost 3 years straight and that was shitty. Theres no reason I can't be in a state of wellbeing for a consecutive period straight as well.
 

CLASH

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Joined
Sep 15, 2017
Messages
1,219
opiate properties of the milk can induce the effects you mentioned:

"not really getting anything done, having fatigue, having brain fog, losing motiviation, being irritated frequently, not really having emotions or feelings and feeling like a broke person."

"Also have this non sexuality feeling in my genitals which is annoying. Sometimes can have a decent libido but other times it just feels....dead and numb no fire no passion no nothing. Its a huge annoyance of mine that it doesn't work."

Eating too low fat and too little in general can also induce these effects.
 
OP
Elchapchapchapo
Joined
Jul 20, 2016
Messages
315
opiate properties of the milk can induce the effects you mentioned:

"not really getting anything done, having fatigue, having brain fog, losing motiviation, being irritated frequently, not really having emotions or feelings and feeling like a broke person."

"Also have this non sexuality feeling in my genitals which is annoying. Sometimes can have a decent libido but other times it just feels....dead and numb no fire no passion no nothing. Its a huge annoyance of mine that it doesn't work."

Eating too low fat and too little in general can also induce these effects.

ah I see these feelings were obtained before milk. Before earlier this week milk and dairy really wasn’t apart of my diet
 

GreekDemiGod

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Joined
Aug 9, 2019
Messages
3,325
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Romania
Following, since I relate a lot to this.

Sounds like depression. RP mentioned depression is a problem of insufficient pregnenolone and excess cortisol.
How is your diet in terms of total calories and protein intake? Are your temps/pulse good? Do you get light and vitamin D?

PUFA depletion, sunlight exposure (for both light and vitamin D), thyroid supplementation, high protein + salt intake, aspirin, sugar, high caloric intake, gelatin, thoughtlessness/avoiding rumination, etc. all shift hormones in the right direction.
Interesting angle. My Pansterone will soon arrive, really optimistic about it.

  • My diet is high-calories, more than enough protein.
  • temps are decent, could be better
  • I get little light, supplemented Vit. D and took my serum levels high, but no effects from it.
  • high-enough salt intake
  • Aspirin Yes
  • sugar - Yes
  • gelatin - No
Preg. might be the missing piece for me.
 

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