Don't Know How Much Longer I Have. Can't Take The Constant, Unrelenting, Unexplainable; Anguish

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LambdaAlpha

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Yeah, I thought about heavy metals but idk if that's the case. I was COMPLETELY healthy in every way until I took accutane about 2 years ago. Now i am ****88. I did what you guys suggested and got blood tests, just got the results. All thyroid hormones are completely normal, vit d levels are completely normal at 39 ng/ml, this is bull****...I am tired if living like this with no explanation. Wish I could go back in time and never take that garbage. I am screwed...thank you all for the help though. Accutane did some things that can't be fixed I am forced to live a shitty life in this broken down/damaged vessel...which I probably can't deal with for long.
 
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LambdaAlpha

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The only cure is death at this point. This isn't some video game or fictional work...my body is screwed. We only get one body...mine got ****88 because I trusted my dermatologist, it is over. For years people have been trying to resolve accutane side effects, nobody knows why or how it happens no labs or scientists even really care enough to look into it. **** this life
 

kremer

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that vit D level is on the lower end...probably not low enough to be causing major issues

you can find out pretty quickly if heavy metals are an issue with a round of chelation
 

stsfut

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Holy ***t bro. We are twins. I very easily could've written this. Every detail. Now 26 but issues started at 21. My TSH was like .7 but still felt hypothyroid. T4 was under range and T3 low and lost like 100 pounds in a year. I am now on TRT and take thyroid meds.. My issues really started after a bad Mono case in college. Then I started doing radical diets like low fat and stupid stuff like that.
 

InChristAlone

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Someone mentioned hydration. I found this weird website after reading a comment he made on quora and haven't been able to stop thinking about it. He claims hydration dehydration cycles are the cureall. I hope to try it soon. Couldn't cause any harm I mean unless you take dehydration too far. But dry fasting is becoming popular to restore kidney health so I can't imagine a day of reduced water intake would kill. http://healthyindianow.in/category/home/
 
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Thanks for the reply, yeah i tried nexabiotic probiotic and it just further escelated the constipation. One of my most bothersome issues is the constipation. Hard to eat 3500 caloroes a day when it barely comes out. Just makes me feel even more crappy. Vit d was making me feel ok, then it started to make my sympto.s worse. Perhaps because no magnesium? I ordered Vit K 15mg mk4 (relentless improvement, vit d, and mag glycinate per your recommendations on my last thread.

i'm starting to understand more about dehydration and water, especially in relation to salt and coffee. ray's article on water makes it sound like water is not "necessary", but he says it because he is eating like 3k, 4k calories a day and gets water from it. now, constipation happens when the stool is hard and all the liquid is getting sucked out of it by the body. water makes the waste more moisturized and gets stuff to move along.

what made me think about it initially was when i tried to understand why an enema works. enema loosens the stools by filing it with water.

i don't know, don't take this for advice, because i don't know yet, but salt/coffee will further drive up dehydration, and if you are all ready not eating enough calories because nothing is coming out, how can you expect to be getting enough water.

the ray peaters will say hypothyroidism is causing constipation, which makes sense from some perspectives, but when you are caught in a bad cycle of constipation, endotoxin, dehydration, high stress hormones, how can these things work together. maybe the dehydration is leading to the hypothyroidism. dehyrdation will increase stress.

anyway, these are things i'm thinking about right now. i havent seen anyone really talk about this before, but i think it warrants some inspection. i would be extremely careful with thyroid as many people will say hypothyroidism causes constipation, but i would think sometimes thyroid can further drive up stress.
 

Luann

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LambdaAlpha, I'm praying for you, don't give up. I pray that peace is with you while you get back on your feet and that you are guided from above. " The peace I give is a gift the world cannot give."
 
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LambdaAlpha

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Stsfut
My T4 is .81
My t3 is 1.12
My tsh is like 1.92
I thought for sure i was hypo but with these bloods...There is no way in hell I'm hypo. Or is there? I doubt it...
I will look into fasting I am up to try anything so I can have my life back. I've spent over 100$ on sups in a month
 
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LambdaAlpha

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LambdaAlpha, I'm praying for you, don't give up. I pray that peace is with you while you get back on your feet and that you are guided from above. " The peace I give is a gift the world cannot give."
I really appreciate it...I do. Though, if the big man upstairs wanted it...none of us would even need this forum. I've spent countless hours praying...begging...for my ailments to be no more...no luck yet.
 

stsfut

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Stsfut
My T4 is .81
My t3 is 1.12
My tsh is like 1.92
I thought for sure i was hypo but with these bloods...There is no way in hell I'm hypo. Or is there? I doubt it...
I will look into fasting I am up to try anything so I can have my life back. I've spent over 100$ on sups in a month
What are the ranges for those values? Is that FT3?
 

Diokine

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Retinoic acid is involved in the maintenance and production of lipocalins, proteins which transport small hydrophobic molecules like steroids and lipids, among others. They are incredibly important for detailed manipulation of metabolism. 13-cis-retinoic acid (accutane) is an extraordinary powerful agonist (activator) of the retinoic acid receptor, and in certain segments of the population its use will result in severe fatigue of the feedback loops maintaining lipocalin production and sensitivity.

The effect, roughly speaking, is to leave the body in a state of constant unresolved inflammation via upregulation of inflammatory cytokines. This will render the body incredibly resistant to the effect of androgens, and in general will increase HTPA-axis dysfunction and can derange emotional well-being. Healing will require restoration of sensitivity - food restriction or intermittent exposure to very low temperatures are very effective. Complete restriction of immunogenic foods is usually required. Wheat, dairy, and eggs can be very problematic.

Did you test bilirubin?
 
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LambdaAlpha

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Retinoic acid is involved in the maintenance and production of lipocalins, proteins which transport small hydrophobic molecules like steroids and lipids, among others. They are incredibly important for detailed manipulation of metabolism. 13-cis-retinoic acid (accutane) is an extraordinary powerful agonist (activator) of the retinoic acid receptor, and in certain segments of the population its use will result in severe fatigue of the feedback loops maintaining lipocalin production and sensitivity.

The effect, roughly speaking, is to leave the body in a state of constant unresolved inflammation via upregulation of inflammatory cytokines. This will render the body incredibly resistant to the effect of androgens, and in general will increase HTPA-axis dysfunction and can derange emotional well-being. Healing will require restoration of sensitivity - food restriction or intermittent exposure to very low temperatures are very effective. Complete restriction of immunogenic foods is usually required. Wheat, dairy, and eggs can be very problematic.

Did you test bilirubin?
yes I tested bilirubin, let me get the paper.
So what steps should I take exactly? It's weird before accutane i could gain muscle easilt and i always had a low body fat and high metab, and extrwnely high sex drive. During accutane i gained alot of weight, started to lose my musculature and gained a feminine fat pattern around my hips, and my libido went south so bad i thought i was asexual. I also got gynecomastia...something I'd never had in my life. Though i still felt like i could do everyday things, I still had energy etc, didn't lay in bed all day...etc. fast forward like 8-9 months after accutane...this is where it gets weird...my body fat, musculature, weight etc that i had pre tane started to return...my gyno went away...I could gain muscle by barely doing anything like before accutane...the female fat patterns went away etc...but then it switched, then came ibs, fatigue, gerd, dizziness, etc...at least before it looked like something could be wrong (even though I felt fine)...now, about a year and a half later/two years later i look like i did pre tane but i feel like absolute trash...it makes no sense. It's like my body resolved part of the damage bit it's not reflecting this in the inside...hormonaly I am highly above average in testosterone and dht. How could it be androgen insensitivity still?
 

Lore

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To everyone suggesting i eat more, i try but my bowels don't move as they should and piling on more food on an already sluggish and underactive bowel makes me feel worse. I don't want a perforated bowel, anytime soon. Gotta try to fix this constipation, as it's one of my more debilitating symptoms.
I'm just halfway through all the posts, but may I suggest (speaking from experience) and I think everyone will agree; The gut and bowel system must work 1st. So, whatever else is happening, start here 1st and get this to work. As mentioned, there are several things to get the bowels moving.

Your Gut:
  1. Three day cleanse (I've used Dr. Christopher's, it works great and it is very tolerable. Suggest a 3 day weekend, you'll want to be home for this)
  2. Synergistic formula w/Cascara Dr. Christopher's ( Christopher's Quick Colon Formula ) (I just picked a link to make it easy for you to find)
    1. He instructs you, that if you get hungry while on the cleanse, eat the fruit or vegetable of the juice you're using, be sure to masticate your food.
    2. I've used as much as 6-8 capsules when I started to get my bowels moving years ago, however, you may cramp up, but you'll survive. You need to get the bowels moving.
    3. You can also do a coffee enema, let me know if you need instructions for this.
  3. After you get your bowels moving and keep them moving, then add your next thing.
  4. You can add your tolerance of Vit C. This too will help get and keep you moving. Find your own tolerance.
  5. And drink water (bottled) when you feel thirsty.
Your Hyperventilation/Anxiety/Emotions:
  1. Next thing you'll want to do is slow down your breathing. You said you're hyperventilating (again, I have experience with this), visit Normal Breathing, follow his instructions and he will teach you how to slow down your breathing. This is contributing to your anxiety.
Your Anxiety/Hyperventilation/Emotions:
  1. The next thing is your emotions. Dr. Nims has a program that you can do in the privacy of your own home, that works! (Again, speaking from experience) He has a few videos on Youtube also.
Here are 3 cost effective, tried, tested and approved methods that should get you feeling better fast (like in days/week or so.)

Chances are, you have something very simple to correct, mainly your diet and emotions. Stress will play havoc with your gut/system. I'm working with another individual going through the same thing you are. He too is 20 some years old. A young buck, out on his own and not taking care of himself. ;) You'll be fine if you do what's right and good for yourself.

Even if you have something that will require more medical attention, this should still be the place to start before you even think of talking to a Dr. These items, and I think everyone on this forum will agree, are probably the most important "basics" for starting one's healing process.

Let me know how this goes. I hope you find this useful.
Lore
 

Travis

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Lol, for months now I've been feeling like I'm going to drop dead at any second, feeling like my body is betraying me. On the outside i look like a healthy, normal, 21 year old. I have a nice build, skin, teeth, etc. I look healthy but I'm not. I have Ibs, 80% of the time my stools are hard balls, i have gerd aswell. My throat is always dry and burning from the acid reflux. I have shortness of breathe and dizziness all day on and off. I feel out of it most of the time. Spsced out, unfocused like I'm not even here. I feel like trash. Shortness of breathe, palpitations, heavy legs, bad cordination, anxiety, heacy chest I look upon people my age and even older with envy. Nobody believes me because i appear completely healthy. Wtf is wrong with me? Always exhausted, mentally, physically. I feel like death is near. Have had several panic attacks, all kinds of tests with the doctors to no avail. They say I'm perfectly healthy. Except for ibs snd gerd. Lol! I can't do this, i have no drive in my life because I'm suffering from some invisible...unknown ailment. Please someone kill me, i want to die. People around me just think I'm a "slacker" haha or don't take things seriously. I FEEL LIKE I'M DYING, all of the time, well most of the time. That's another thing, I'll have brief moments/stretches where i feel like a healthy human should feel, that's when I'll get stuff done, but that feeling doesn't last long. Anyone have any insight? I'd have killed myself already if i knew what happened after death, but i don't so i want to stay alive as long as possible, but not like this.
Perhaps you should stop eating wheat and dairy?

And you could perhaps stop eating vitamin A. You're liver could be saturated with retinol that had been absorbed, stored, yet not used since you had so much circulating pseudo‐retinoic acid (Accutane™).

There is no way this could cause permanent damage, but you'd think it could cause a partitioning of retinol in the body. This retinol–retinoid acid system is under tight control with many enzymes and feedback loops. Taking pseudo‐retinoic acid (Accutane™) might logically affect retinol stores, and elevated liver retinol has been linked to aggression. I would guess that most Americans have enough retinol to last four months on a totally retinol–β-carotene-deficient diet.
 
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LambdaAlpha

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Perhaps you should stop eating wheat and dairy?

And you could perhaps stop eating vitamin A. You're liver could be saturated with retinol that had been absorbed, stored, yet not used since you had so much circulating pseudo‐retinoic acid (Accutane™).

There is no way this could cause permanent damage, but you'd think it could cause a partitioning of retinol in the body. This retinol–retinoid acid system is under tight control with many enzymes and feedback loops. Taking pseudo‐retinoic acid (Accutane™) might logically affect retinol stores, and elevated liver retinol has been linked to aggression. I would guess that most Americans have enough retinol to last four months on a totally retinol–β-carotene-deficient diet.
Interesting...I read somewhere that accutane can cause a Vitamin A deficiency as weird as it sounds.
 

Travis

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Mawson, Anthony R. "On the association between low resting heart rate and chronic aggression: Retinoid toxicity hypothesis." Progress in Neuro-Psychopharmacology and Biological Psychiatry (2009)

'Serum retinol concentrations (normally 1–3 μmol/L) do not reflect hepatic vitamin A concentrations over a wide range of liver values, since the secreted RBP is under homeostatic control. Similarly, serum retinol concentrations vary little despite major alterations in vitamin A intake. Case reports of hypervitaminosis A often show serum retinol concentrations within normal limits, indicating that serum retinol is not a valid measure of vitamin A status during toxicity (Olson, 2001).' ―Mawson

'Research on vitamin A toxicity has been carried out mostly in animals, but observational studies suggest that 75% of people in developed countries routinely consume more than the recommended dietary allowance (RDA) for vitamin A (Allen and Haskell, 2002). Children are particularly sensitive to vitamin A, toxicity being induced with daily intakes of 1500 IU/kg body weight (Coghlan and Cranswick, 2001).' ―Mawson

'Case reports, retrospective analyses of databases and governmental reports of drug-related adverse events (e.g., from the Federal Drug Administration, WHO, and the United Kingdom's Medicines Control Agency) provide presumptive evidence that acute or chronic exposure to high concentrations of vitamin A – either from dietary intake of preformed vitamin A (e.g., liver) or the use of synthetic analogs of vitamin A, e.g. isotretinoin or 13-cis-retinoic acid (13-cis-RA) for the treatment of acne – is associated with depression, suicidal ideation and actual suicide, psychosis, bizarre abnormal behavior, impulsivity, irritability and aggression (Restak, 1972; O'Donnell, 2004; Bremner and McCaffery, 2008; O'Reilly et al., 2008). Numerous case reports and studies suggest that depression, suicide, psychosis and aggression are associated with 13-cis-RA use in particular; reports of positive dechallenge and rechallenge are especially strong signs of an association between 13-cis-RA and depression (Hull and D'Arcy, 2003).' ―Mawson

'The mesolimbic dopaminergic (DA) system, which plays a key role in motivational and reward systems of the brain, is strongly influenced by retinoids, and DA dysregulation is associated with aggression and mood changes, including depression (Nestler and Carlezon, 2006). Retinoids promote DA signaling in the embryo and increase the expression of genes involved in DA signal transduction (Wang and Liu, 2005). The dopamine 2 (D2) dopamine receptor gene contains a retinoic acid response element (RARE) and is a central target of retinoic acid (Samad et al., 1997). Repeated antidepressant treatment, as well as treatment with retinoic acid, increases D2 receptor expression in the striatum (Valdenaire et al., 1998) and in cultured cells (Dziedzicka-Waslyewska and Solich, 2004). It should be noted that the onset of depression (and possibly of aggression/ suicide ideation) occurs after several weeks of using 13-cis-RA, perhaps reflecting a biphasic response involving an initial induction of DA activation followed by a long-term decline (Bremner and McCaffery, 2008).' ―Mawson

Retinoic acid is a lipid, and could potentially be stored in lipid membranes—everywhere.

The serum levels of retinol do not change with isotretinoin, but there are some changes in skin retinol (not shown). And what about the liver? Of course, liver biopsies are too invasive to be a routine procedure but I think you could expect an increase. By taking cis‐retinoic acid, you might expect less retinol ester hydrolysis in the liver; this lower biosynthesis rate in addition to a constant storage rate would yield a net increase in liver retinol. There appears to be no stop point with dietary retinol absorption, and the liver appears to absorb and store it until there is little room for anything else.

retinol.png


Rollman, Ola. "Oral isotretinoin (13-cis-retinoic acid) therapy in severe acne: drug and vitamin A concentrations in serum and skin." Journal of investigative dermatology (1986)
 

Travis

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Interesting...I read somewhere that accutane can cause a Vitamin A deficiency as weird as it sounds.
I think you should demand an explanation from the person you heard that from.
 

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