Childhood Abuse - How to Forgive?

grapes

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On the second question, my theory (somewhat metaphysical) would be that our bad memories are stored at liver level (I think Chinese traditional medicine says the same) The foods you eat somehow affect your liver which releases bad memories.
 

HighT

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So wash your mask, get a new one or just don't wear one. I don't suffer slave mentality, that's all in your head.
Actually is in your head, cause you are the one wearing a rag on your face and washing it like a good boy and most importantly DEFENDING IT.

Just a question. Please tell me honestly. Were you wearing a mask 2 years ago to increase CO2 ? And If there are other methods getting CO2, why would you advocate masks ? My assumption is cause a slave mentality... wether you realize it or not.
 
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oldfriend

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Actually is in your head, cause you are the one wearing a rag on your face and washing it like a good boy and most importantly DEFENDING IT.

Just a question. Please tell me honestly. Were you wearing mask 2 years ago to increase CO2 ? And If there are other methods getting CO2, why would you advocate masks ? . My assumption is cause a slave mentality... wether you realize it or not.
I'm actually defending OPs right to wear one without judgement or persecution more than I am defending masks themselves. Just pointing out one upside of masks and that discussion is more appropriate for this forum than the one you're trying to have. I actually can't be bothered to wash masks and just opt to wear a new one which is 50% of the time I go out maybe? I actually did wear a mask a couple years ago when we had fires in Northern California, that's when I found out about increased c02.
 

HighT

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I'm actually defending OPs right to wear one without judgement or persecution more than I am defending masks themselves. Just pointing out one upside of masks and that discussion is more appropriate for this forum than the one you're trying to have. I actually can't be bothered to wash masks and just opt to wear a new one which is 50% of the time I go out maybe? I actually did wear a mask a couple years ago when we had fires in Northern California, that's when I found out about increased c02.
Of course, Im defending his right to wear a mask too. But is my duty to point him the downside. Negative effects have been proven, including those on behaviour and mental state. But you said they are in my head. Also Im finding this very much appropriate for this topic and for the whole forum.
 
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oldfriend

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Of course, Im defending his right to wear a mask too. But is my duty to point him the downside. Negative effects have been proven, including those on behaviour and menthal state. But you said they are in my head. Also Im finding this very much appropriate for this topic and for the whole forum.
Yeah let's see those studies that show masks cause slave mentality. Maybe start a new thread though? Think we've already done a fair bit to derail this one.
 

Jib

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This is a part of an explanation : in a modern matriarcatic society women often make children with men they don't love, they do it to ensure their financial (& other) resources. (Or else by the time they have a child they no more love the father) They don't love children coming from this union, and use them as a receptacle of their negative energy.

Absolutely. Seen this happen with many of my friends. Disturbing to think of how these kids will be once they grow up.

One of my close friends fell into this exact situation. Basically was the most available guy when it was crunch time to get married and have kids. Come to find out she doesn't even like him, and now they're en route for divorce and she's gladly threatening to take half the house and custody of the kid. Got what she wanted and is more than happy to leave him on the curb.

And has no conception at all about her baby. Does not see any possible reason divorce would affect her daughter. Isn't even a remote afterthought. Having witnessed firsthand the extreme negative energy, yelling and screaming, with the newborn right in the room....yeah. People that believe that doesn't affect babies are completely delusional. And neglectful.
 
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GermanTruther

GermanTruther

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Wearing masks increases c02 levels. That coronavirus was the impetus for universal mask wearing is a bit ridiculous, but I'm happy to wear one in a public honestly.

Glutamic acid isn't inherently bad but with it can be neurotoxic. It depends on your chemistry, nmda function, metabolism, status of certain nutrients etc. Animal foods can be very high in glutamic acid, and refined products like gelatin have been very problematic for me in the past. I used to put it in my coffee and meals every day and my PTSD symptoms were among the worst they've ever been during that period.
lmfao, those bastard PTSD symptoms.
You wear a mask all day long to raise your C02, while sipping on sugared milk?
 
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oldfriend

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lmfao, those bastard PTSD symptoms.
You wear a mask all day long to raise your C02, while sipping on sugared milk?
No but that was probably me 2 years ago when it was advised to wear masks indoors during the really bad fires. I actually don't wear a mask that often now, only when I go grocery shopping really. I live in a community where maybe only 25% of people wear masks so it's not really that big a deal to me. A lot of people in the asian communities around me wear them, and have always worn them in public around flu season and that seems very hygienic and sensible to me. In my early 20s I got the worst flu working at a pharmacy where sick people often come to buy their NyQuil or whatever. Where was the concern back then? People die from influenza every year.
Anyways, Getting caught up in the politics of the pandemic has been an exhausting experience. I see a lot of people going to the other extreme which is more often than not energy wasted in my opinion. I figure if you're a member of the forum you're probably already in agreement about the vaccine, mask mandates, lockdowns etc. so unsolicited comments about masks causing slave mentality in a thread about trauma read like something from a reddit echo chamber. I see that your avatar is probably not a picture of you now so HighTs comment and my reaction to it was totally unnecessary haha. Back to the topic
 
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lampofred

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My mom is a bit critical, narcissistic, superficial, etc. but I sincerely view it as a blessing in disguise because her vanity is what made me care enough about my own hair loss to find Ray Peat, which in turn has given me a chance to turn around my entire life for the better. So I think the type of harshness associated with type A, perfectionistic type of parenting can either hurt your confidence or be used as a tool to improve the course of your life, although admittedly that's much easier said than done.

For deeper, less superficial pain, what helps me a lot is realizing that in 99% of cases, no one purposefully wants to make a child suffer and that their cruelty isn't really voluntary, it's a product of their own harsh past experiences. Once I realize that, it makes me lose the desire to want to retaliate because if at some point someone doesn't stop retaliating, if people keep being harsh to others just because others were harsh to them, then the cycle of abuse will never end.

But I think over-forgiveness is also something to be careful about because in the 1% of cases where someone genuinely enjoys making a child suffer and has no prior incident that could explain why (but it's pretty hard to know whether or not there was such a prior incident, since what's happening in the present day might have its origin in something that happened three generations ago, which we would be unaware of) my view is that forgiveness would be a waste of time; if someone is that deranged then it would be physically impossible for them to feel remorse and change for the better. So I think it would make more sense to retaliate, it wouldn't be immature to retaliate rather than forgive as forgiveness would just get taken advantage of.

(That genuine sadism seems pretty rare but I think it does exist. It seems that everything in the universe has a purpose so I'm trying to understand what the purpose of genuine sadism is and if there is ever a situation where it would be appropriate to forgive genuine sadism. Or is the universe imperfect and not everything has a purpose? Or was the universe purposefully made imperfect?)

Also, I think biologically milk represents forgiveness. If forgiveness in the mind is genuine, then there will be noticeable accompanying hormonal changes in the body, and on the flip side, if the body's hormonal environment is altered (with milk, possibly progesterone also), then it should become easier for the mind to genuinely forgive. This article talks about the physiology of forgiveness: https://drlwilson.com/ARTICLES/FORGIVING.htm.

I'm interested in what things in addition to milk would help with genuine forgiveness if anyone knows. I'd also be interested in what things would help to retaliate intelligently but not immaturely in situations that are so far gone that forgiveness might no longer be appropriate.
 

HighT

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Yeah let's see those studies that show masks cause slave mentality. Maybe start a new thread though? Think we've already done a fair bit to derail this one.
As if they are going to make such study and they will use the term slave mentality. Or if there is not a study about something observable it couldn't be a fact or at least debated. But Im going to try.. Im sure it won't be enough for you so feel free to respond in a PM. Do not try to have the last word here and blaming me for derailing the thread. My argument is still valid to the topic, while you are saying masks increses CO2 - no sht, how people would figure that out without you mentioned.



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Just wash your mask bro. Muh I had influenza muh I don't wash my mask I'm buying a new one ? Asians seem very hygienic and reasonable to me but hey stard a new thread cause we derailed the topic...
 
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oldfriend

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As if they are going to make such study and they will use the term slave mentality. Or if there is not a study about something observable it couldn't be a fact or at least debated. But Im going to try.. Im sure it won't be enough for you so feel free to respond in a PM. Do not try to have the last word here and blaming me for derailing the thread. My argument is still valid to the topic, while you are saying masks increses CO2 - no sht, how people would figure that out without you mentioned.

Just wash your mask bro. Muh I had influenza muh I don't wash my mask I'm buying a new one ? Asians seem very hygienic and reasonable to me but hey stard a new thread cause we derailed the topic...
Yeah that was like my point. Masks are not a modern day symbol of slavery and I just don't find them as triggering as you do, sorry. That's great that you already know they increase c02 levels. I guess taking an unbiased and fresh look at the case for mask wearing in a general and non-covid context is an interesting topic IMO? If you want to chat through PM that's fine.
 

Birdie

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Wearing masks increases c02 levels. That coronavirus was the impetus for universal mask wearing is a bit ridiculous, but I'm happy to wear one in a public honestly.

Glutamic acid isn't inherently bad but with it can be neurotoxic. It depends on your chemistry, nmda function, metabolism, status of certain nutrients etc. Animal foods can be very high in glutamic acid, and refined products like gelatin have been very problematic for me in the past. I used to put it in my coffee and meals every day and my PTSD symptoms were among the worst they've ever been during that period.
Glad you brought up the CO2/mask idea. We asked Ray about this once. I had bought masks thinking it was a good idea, 10 years ago. Ray said no. I don't remember how he put it. Just wanted to insert Ray's take here.
 

Birdie

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I had a very verbally abusive mother that was most abusive to me and not my sisters. It was like a Cinderella situation honestly. I feel like I reminded her of my father and that was why she hated me? ( they were divorced when the abuse got bad ) . My father was pretty high strung and I had a lot of " spankings " ( bruises ). My mother had no thyroid and was medicated with Synthroid her whole life. I am going to blame it on that and her really hard childhood and possibly a gluten allergy that I have then she didn't know she had. The only thing that really helped me was having Ketamine during a surgery . It seemed to wipe out a lot of PTSD. Yoga helps. Boxing helps. Sleep helps. I will never understand why she thought it was ok to verbally abuse me and **** with my young head like she did. She got very sweet when she was diagnosed with " dementia " . She was an older mother and a Mensa member. When she died I was very sad but also relieved in a way. I am not sure if you ever totally heal.
Beautifully put.
 

Hugh Johnson

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In the end you have to decide you want to stop carrying their crap. Resentment is a poison you drink while hoping it harms another.

That is the start. Louise Hay has some nice method, as does Teal Swan, because practically speaking letting go is not that easy.
 

Pet Peeve

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I would advice you to search up narcissistic personality disorder on YouTube.
 
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oldfriend

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They are indeed. It's an easy observable fact. I won the debate.
Sure bro, you win
Glad you brought up the CO2/mask idea. We asked Ray about this once. I had bought masks thinking it was a good idea, 10 years ago. Ray said no. I don't remember how he put it. Just wanted to insert Ray's take here.
I thought I was standing up for OP and was looking at increased c02 only as a positive side effect of wearing masks, not the sole reason to wear a mask because bag breathing would be easier and probably more effective. However, I am curious about the efficacy of mask-wearing in preventing the spread of pathogens in general (not just covid) and would love to find out more about that or maybe revisit this topic here when members can stomach it.

@GermanTruther Do you still live with your mom or recently moved back home? Did something happen recently to precipitate re-traumatization?
 
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Michael Mohn

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My family situation was similar to yours, working single mom, early separation from my father and lots of abuse.

When I started peating all the suppressed memories, anger and rage came up. I think high metabolism allows you to face your demons.
I don't want to do my Gordon Gekko bit how Hate is Good but hate against people who threaten your life and well being is natural. Reacting to these emotions in real life is obviously futile when the events are far in the past but still you want to own your hate.

If you can't feel hate in the moment when you're abused than you're conditioned to submit. This is why the elites promote single motherhood.

Something that helped me a lot with childhood trauma was doing Brazilian Juijutsu. Experiencing violence in slow motion, defending against it and doing it over and over again is truly liberating.
 

Razvan

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I‘ve been emotionally and physically abused by mother since I was a child. She wasn’t a bad mother over all, she did a lot to make me happy and I was taken care of.
Unfortunately, I think she’s mentally ill or just has a destroyed gut which made her unleash all her anger and frustration onto me.
I was severely emotionally tortured and insulted, made fun of and told I should have never been born etc.
The typical stuff a stressed parents tells their children. Also physically abused and basically grew up being scared when she’ll have another breakdown.
On top of this my parents divorced when I was 8.. so yeah imagine that, the only person who was always nice and chill (my dad) had to leave the house. Super traumatizing.
Funnily enough whenever I consume raw animal foods, my desire for revenge increases a lot and all i re-experience all the trauma in my head. Drank fermented raw milk yesterday and now all the memories come back.. this always happens.
My questions:

1. What causes a parent to physically and emotionally abuse THEIR OWN child?

2. Why does something like raw milk make me re-experience all the trauma?
All the people said that milk gives you serotonin that's why you remember it and you want revenge.

I don't think it's like this,in fact i think raw milk raises DHT and makes you take revenge, serotonin will make you anxious and scared If you remember traumatising moments, not taking revenge.

Serotonin makes you remember trauma in a bad way, like a nightmare, with fear and anxiety.
DHT makes you stop caring about anything and you think in a very different way, that's why with DHT all my reletionships go down .
 
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GermanTruther

GermanTruther

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All the people said that milk gives you serotonin that's why you remember it and you want revenge.

I don't think it's like this,in fact i think raw milk raises DHT and makes you take revenge, serotonin will make you anxious and scared If you remember traumatising moments, not taking revenge.

Serotonin makes you remember trauma in a bad way, like a nightmare, with fear and anxiety.
DHT makes you stop caring about anything and you think in a very different way, that's why with DHT all my reletionships go down .
Are you on NoFap brother? You sure seem like someone whose goal is to maximize androgens
 

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