At What Age Do Men Get 'baby Fever'?

[TheSir]

After a decade of search for a rational justification for bringing another being into existence, I realized that my approach is completely wrong. Reproduction should require no intellectual justification, instead reproduction should emerge naturally from our biological imperative. Thus, I see now, that the core of my problem is not a lack of justification, but a lack of biological imperative. I feel no urge to breed.

This worries me on multiple levels. Why do I feel no urge to breed? Am I biologically defective? Is nature telling me that my genes should not be passed on? Should only those breed who feel the biological calling for it? And that's just the physiological level: even though I suspect that I should want to reproduce, I only feel dread thinking about it. It's such an enormous responsibility. The burden of having entrapped a helpless being into this weird existence. The pain of having such pure eyes fixed in adoration at you, an unworthy and depraved being. Such horror.

I seem to be naturally inclined towards antinatalistic sentiments, which I don't like it one bit. It is such a stupid conclusion that it can't be right. It can't be truthful in its own right. It can only be an expression of a deeper issue. What is my issue? I can't say.

Which one is more severe: ending eons of directly descending lineage, or the risk of ending up creating a human whose life is full of misery? Does the continuation of life have more value than the suffering of those who partake in life? Can there even exist an answer to such a complex question?

I don't know what I'm even talking about at this point. I am 27 and still waiting for the nature to urge me to breed, while at the same time fearing for the day. Child or childless, I can't see much good coming out of either path -- in the end someone gets hurt anyway.

 

[ecstatichamster]

Men often become fathers because their wife or girlfriend want kids. After the birth their father instincts kick in and they are very glad. Nothing unusual in your feelings.

 

[baccheion]

Women have baby fever. Men have a higher libido (ie, non-specific; decreases with age). Older males would have baby fever if it ever happens, as estrogens are rising.

 

[Michael Mohn]

A friend had a miserable childhood due to abuse and he became very anti family he said he didn't want to cause somebody else the same suffering. Later he saw the children of his friends growing up happily and the joy of parenthood. He changed his mind and stopped projecting his negative feelings. When his girl friend became pregnant without much trying he was a very happy father.

In western societies there are subversive forces who discourage parenthood for short term economic reasons, to push women into the labour force and lower salaries. Also to further demographic decline and weaken western societies.
Social safety nets like pension plans and social(ist) security will collapse due to demographic decline, if you want some support in old age you better start having children.
Don't waste your time on justifications and indifference, find a good girl and get horny. Trust nature.

 

[Zigzag]

Whatever you do, do not marry.

 

[lvysaur]

The sex drive is your urge to breed.

 

[metabolizm]

I don't think men get "baby fever". We have children either by accident, or to satisfy our partners, or because we genuinely want to start a family. Pretty much what @ecstatichamster said.

 

[GreekDemiGod]

How's your Testosterone levels?

 

[schultz]

Men often become fathers because their wife or girlfriend want kids. After the birth their father instincts kick in and they are very glad. Nothing unusual in your feelings.

Yah I've seen this play out several times. Men have a baby by accident and then it ends up being the greatest thing that happened to them. It gives their life meaning. I wanted children although I don't think it was baby fever like my wife had. I just can't imagine growing to 50 or 60 and having no children and feeling alone and like I did nothing with my life. Some people devote their lives to a career, which just seems pitiful to me, unless you're really doing something incredible and world changing. But working in some cubicle for 45 years instead of starting a family seems like the biggest waste. Im from a family of 4 kids though and we had a lot of fun together playing board games or going different places on vacation, eating dinner together, movie night, playing Lego or building forts outside and all kinds of stuff, or my father reading to us at night. I wanted to continue that with children of my own. It's nice to have little people around to appreciate all the things you did when you were little. Everything is new and exciting to them and it makes you appreciate all of the little things in life. Like they go crazy for a cardboard box and decorate it, turn it into a fort and all that. Plus children are a source of endless amusement. You can't know the joy and hilarity of it until you have your own. The things they say and do. It really changes you for the better.

Whatever you do, do not marry.

I think marriage is for the kids. It's good for them to have a stable family. I told my brother and sister, both of whom are married with no children, that I thought marriage was pointless without children and they got really mad at me lol. But to me it's true. What's the point?

The sex drive is your urge to breed.

Haha, yeah I was thinking this too.

 

[Zigzag]

I think marriage is for the kids. It's good for them to have a stable family. I told my brother and sister, both of whom are married with no children, that I thought marriage was pointless without children and they got really mad at me lol. But to me it's true. What's the point?

Very true about the stable environment for children. Also very true about the marriage being pointless without them. If a man is not 100% sure about having children and is not willing to sacrifice a lot then he should just stay single. By "sacrifice" I mean sexual fidelity. I just don't believe men can be satisfied with one partner.

 

[Deleted member 5487]

After a decade of search for a rational justification for bringing another being into existence, I realized that my approach is completely wrong. Reproduction should require no intellectual justification, instead reproduction should emerge naturally from our biological imperative. Thus, I see now, that the core of my problem is not a lack of justification, but a lack of biological imperative. I feel no urge to breed.

This worries me on multiple levels. Why do I feel no urge to breed? Am I biologically defective? Is nature telling me that my genes should not be passed on? Should only those breed who feel the biological calling for it? And that's just the physiological level: even though I suspect that I should want to reproduce, I only feel dread thinking about it. It's such an enormous responsibility. The burden of having entrapped a helpless being into this weird existence. The pain of having such pure eyes fixed in adoration at you, an unworthy and depraved being. Such horror.

I seem to be naturally inclined towards antinatalistic sentiments, which I don't like it one bit. It is such a stupid conclusion that it can't be right. It can't be truthful in its own right. It can only be an expression of a deeper issue. What is my issue? I can't say.

Which one is more severe: ending eons of directly descending lineage, or the risk of ending up creating a human whose life is full of misery? Does the continuation of life have more value than the suffering of those who partake in life? Can there even exist an answer to such a complex question?

I don't know what I'm even talking about at this point. I am 27 and still waiting for the nature to urge me to breed, while at the same time fearing for the day. Child or childless, I can't see much good coming out of either path -- in the end someone gets hurt anyway.

‘You feel no urge to breed because it is completely irrational to breed in the current socio-political-economic environment.



1) Neoliberal(Crony State Capitalism) Economic Order=Little to NO job security in fear of offshoring, job cutting, automation, technology, H1-B visa. All jobs from high level engineer/doctor(H1-B) to cashier clerk lives in a constant state insecurity.
2) Unbelievably high housing prices with perpetually increasing property taxes due to fractional reserve monetary banking, cast families into debt-peonage and livelong debt servitude.
3) Horrifically Child Support/Divorce courts that claim the wealth/lives of 50-60% of married men.
4) Destroyed social safety nets makes 1 slip cost you your entire live/opportunity.


We have seen nothing yet, when the election+stock market implosion+1/3 people evicted/foreclosed on in decemeber+dried up unemployment benefits You will see how bad the situation really is.

This depression will not last 30 months, but possibly 30 years and will have inter generational effects.

 

[SonOfEurope]

Well I'm 28 and from the realization of my mortality, absent in my active conscience until a few years ago, and the desire to be young with my kids.. I'm already starting to get it.